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An interview with Sarah Golden of “The Voice”

When Sarah Golden stepped onto The Voice‘s stage, the audience was in the dark along with the judges. Her silhouette couldn’t fool us, though, and soon as she began singing a folked-up version of Lady Gaga‘s “You and I,” it was evident that not only was she a woman who has been judged by tine industry for her not-so-feminine looks, but she is the kind of talent that drives this competition.

The self-professed “out and proud” 27-year-old singer from Houston, Texas has been performing since she graduated high school and says she has a sizable lesbian following, which is only going to grow as the season continues. Sarah was scooped up by judge Cee Lo Green, whose finalist last year was out singer Vicci Martinez. Sarah Golden talked with us about her experiences in the music business, rooming with her team’s other lesbian and why she refuses to change for anyone.

AfterEllen.com: I’m assuming that today has been kind of crazy for you, after seeing the actual episode air?

SG: It has been pretty crazy. My phone has not stopped blowing up, which is awesome, but I also get work emails on my phone, so then I have to sift through hundreds of other notices. Otherwise, I mean, I’m sure there are worse problems to have. But yeah. It’s been very crazy, but awesome.

AE: I was wondering how you picked the Lady Gaga song to perform. Do you have a list of songs you’re allowed to choose from or have you sung the song before?

SG: There [is] a list of songs that you get to choose from. It’s a very comprehensive list. It’s not a list of six songs and it’s like, “Good luck, guys.” It’s hundreds of songs and you have to put them in order, which is very time-taking, to put a hundred songs in order, in terms of which one I would want to do the most, all the way down to which one I would want to do the least.

The things I have to say I love about this show are … this is not the kind of thing where they say, “OK, here’s what you’re doing. And whether you like it or not, that’s what you’re doing.” They very much are open to your opinion and what you want to do and making you as comfortable as possible. And it’s been kind of the resounding note throughout this whole thing, which has just been outstanding. But to answer your question, they do give you a list, and you pick from that list.

Now, I did not regularly sing “You and I.” I regularly sing “Poker Face,” but I sing it in kind of a folky way. And that’s what I actually auditioned with. I auditioned with “Poker Face” and then a very folky song by Gillian Welch, which they had never heard of, which was not a surprise. So, yes. My “Poker Face” was really my song that was something they would know, that they would be able to see where I was coming from. But in the end, I would have to say, throughout the duration, I realized how lucky I was.

A lot of people, I came to realize, really wanted “You and I.” They really wanted Lady Gaga and that was my first choice on the list of songs. And I was always allowed to do it. I was definitely thankful for that.

AE: Did you watch the first season?

SG: I did. … I was totally just attracted to the whole concept of the show. I swear it wasn’t for — this is going to sound stupid — but not for entertainment value. Like, not because I wanted to see if someone got turned around or not. But really, because it really went along with kind of my story and my life. And it was just something that, I swear, I had no intention and no idea of participating in this season, so it was really just one of those inspirational things. There was like, “Oh my God! We’re making strides.” Not to mention, like, half of the finalists last year were gay. Like gay gay. Not like, “You look gay.” I mean, they were gay.

AE: Totally.

SG: And the talked about it. And I was totally in love with it. Even after watching the whole season — again, I still never had the intention of trying out myself — it was just something that we would goof around with during commercial breaks, and we would sing along. And then “Oh, commercial’s over, come over!” and we would jump back on the couch. And that was it. So, yeah. The whole thing was crazy.

AE: What has it been like working with Cee Lo? Were you a fan of his before?

SG: I was a fan of Cee Lo’s. I know, and I told him this as well, I know of his older stuff, Goodie Mob and things of that nature, but I was not as involved with Cee Lo and his musical history until, honestly, until Gnarls Barkley. It wasn’t that I loved Gnarls Barkley, per se, as much as I really loved this guy’s voice. And honestly, I had never seen him, when Gnarls Barkley came out. I bought the CD, but I didn’t know if it was just a band or what.

…And I saw Cee Lo on [Austin City Limits], but I was totally preoccupied doing laundry. And I heard his voice and I recognized it because it is a very unmistakable voice. And I remember just kind of sitting on the floor, was in the middle of laundry, and then, I remember I kind of came to that I had been sitting on the floor in a room with totally wet clothes. And I had just become captivated with this guy. And it was really just effortless. I love his sexy, smoky, sultry sound. It was like he had the ability to be blues-y, gospel-y, but he wasn’t being blues-y, gospel-y. He was being kind of pop and R & B and hip-hoppy. I don’t know. I just love the whole mesh.

So, I recognized his voice at that moment and just became a bigger fan. And since then, I have covered “Forget You,” but the other version. And I even told him as a joke, I said, “Thank God you made ‘Forget You’ because I sing it everywhere.”

I mean, I have a relatively large lesbian following, and I said, “I sing it everywhere. I appreciate so much that it exists. … “Forget You” is like the lesbian national anthem. But I told him, “The lesbians love you, by the way.”

But yeah, I have been a fan. He was the person I wanted to pick when I watched the show, in a pipe dream, in my living room.

AE: You have the other lesbian [Erin Martin] on your team, too. So what is it about Cee Lo? I guess the lesbians just love him.

SG: [Laughs] Well, Cee Lo likes the ladies, I would say that’s a safe assumption. I think the other person on my team has very feminine qualities [that] I don’t know many guys wouldn’t like. We were actually roommates – Erin and I were roommates, which was ironic. And I told the show, I was like, “Really? Of all the people, you’re going to put me with the other lesbian on the show?” I mean, they couldn’t be any dumber here; they put me with a totally not-ugly lesbian. Thank you for that. I was calling home for that.

But ya know, [Cee Lo’s] kind of different. He’s outside the box. I think there’s a kind of magnetism. I mean, I can’t speak for her, but I know that she and I really bonded a lot. And we talked about how she had a really unique sound. And it really is kind of a different thing. It would make sense for her to pick — and I didn’t know her before until we became Cee Lo team members and we were roommates — but it kind of makes sense. He’s a different kind of guy and he doesn’t fit in a box. And I don’t think either of us do either, so it just seemed like it was a natural thing. It just so happens we’re the two lesbians.

AE: Right. What can you say about your record label experience? You talked about on the show how you were told to change your look, because you hear about that all the time from lesbian artists that they’re asked to look less dykey or be more feminine. What was your experience with that?

SG: The minute I got out of high school, I was hot and heavy in music and played 24/7. I played seven days a week. I was totally driven and pretty enthusiastic about it. And I made a CD and had it out in stores, in Borders and all over on the internet. It was everywhere and I was kind of making my way up. I was super stoked about it because I had that crazy, young drive, like I could take over the world. And I’m also not a big quitter.

But, as a lesbian — and I’m sure any gay or basically any person who’s not a straight, white male can attest — growing up in the life has not been the easiest. For the record, anyone who’s said being gay is a choice, has never been a lesbian. Way too much drama and estrogen – no one would choose that life.

So, anyway. I wasn’t shocked, initially, but when I was 18 or 19, I had really kind of started making a name for myself. And a [record] label who I will refrain from mentioning, but a big label, a major label, everyone knows it, contacted me and said they were interested in meeting me. So, we when through this multiple day rigmarole of, “Give us your song lyrics. Tell us what they mean.” And they kind of listened to everything. And at the time, I was in my first relationship, ever, and all my songs were about a girl. And I probably said “she” and “her” 20 times through each song.

And at one point, I had shaved my head and I was just very much like, “I’m going out and I’m going into it and I’m so excited and I’m going to be super gay.” And so, the first label said, “We really like you and we have agreed that we do want to sign you. But you have to agree to some stipulations.” And I was like, “OK, what’s that?” And I’m a pretty stubborn person. And they said, “We will agree to sign you as long as you agreed to never cut your hair. And you have to wear dresses, and you can’t talk about girls. And we’re going to go through every interview before you have it and make sure that no one asks you about your sexual preference. And that’s how it’s going to be.” And I said, “No. I’m totally not interested in that. That sounds like a terrible life.”

One thing that I will never forget was that I played a show when I was young and there was a woman, probably in her 50s. It was a festival. And I watched her walk by and she stopped and ended up leaning or sitting on a post and she watched my show the entire time. And I played like a two or three hour set. And I was like, 16 or 17 or something. And when I finished, she came up to me, and she was crying. And I was like, “Oh my God. Something bad happened.” And she said, “I just want to tell you, I’m 55, and I’m still not out. And the fact that you’re 16, 17, and you’re so out and you just don’t care, and all of your songs are about how gay you are. That has been the hugest inspiration and that has changed my life. And I want to tell you, ‘Please don’t ever change that.'”

And that made me start crying. It makes me start crying when think about it. It impacted me that much. And that was, honest to God, the first thing that came to mind when this label tried to get me to sell out. I was like, “No, man. If only for that one lady, I can’t do it.”

AE: [Laughs] That lady would come after you.

SG: [Laughs] I never saw her again, but she would not have been a fan anymore. The same thing happened with another record label a few years later. But with that first one, I really didn’t care. I couldn’t have given a damn. But then, it happened again with the subsidiary of a company that was interested in me so I thought they would be cool.

They knew I was gay, were totally pumping me along the whole time, but at the end, they said, “We want to go ahead and bring you onto our label – but we do have some stipulations.” And I swear to God, it’s like they had the same manual. It was literally the same conversation.

AE: No!

SG: I was like, “Are you kidding me? Is it always going to happen?” And they said, ” Look. You’re just not marketable the way you are.And I say, “I’ll tell you what. There are no young, gay artists out there. And this would be for any of these reality shows out there – any of these people were brave enough to come out or be out, or whatnot. And there’s no young, gay artists. And sure, I’m going to suck with the middle market demographic, middle America, but there’s going to be a ton of people who are intrigued. Didn’t you ever see the band, t.A.T.u.? They’re weren’t even really lesbians, but they made a killing.

AE: That’s true.

SG: That was my mentality. The guy was like, “Look. Just first, make one million dollars. Then you can be as gay as you want to be.” And it just sucks, to me. I feel like, the Indigo Girls and Melissa Etheridge and Ellen, and everybody else who has had to work their butts off to just get the same kind of respect and then not be able to come out until they were already famous, I think that sucks.

And I appreciate whole-heartedly that they did that for my generation. And I don’t think we would be doing them any kind of favors if we did the same thing. I think it’s to show America, the people that you already love, like Ellen, people that you already trust in making you laugh — I mean what the hell does her sexual preference have to do with anything? But people that you already love are out. And you still can’t help but still love them because you’ve already loved her for 12 plus years. Get over it. And the young person who happens to be gay, too, get over that. I’m just another person.

It didn’t turn out that way. It was very much the same end result. And the guy who was being a scuzzball was like, “You’d look really hot in a summer dress.” And I was like, “Yeah, you, too. I haven’t worn a dress since 1996. There’s no way in hell I’m going back.”

AE: [Laughs] If people like you were changing for them there would never be any progress made, so obviously, you chose the right path. Good for you!

SG: [jokes] Way to be to have a real job and not ever be the musician you wanted to be because you’re so freaking big.

AE: That’s right. Way to have morals and no success. Having The Voice in your life, now that you’re more secure in who you are and your identity, wouldn’t you say?

SG: I absolutely do, I think this was the perfect time. I think I am very confident in who I am. And I don’t really apologize to anyone for being gay, and I don’t really care if anyone judges me by how I look. I don’t dress like I do because I want to be seen as a lesbian. I dress like this because I’m comfortable this way. If I could wear like, tight-fitting girl’s pants and stupid girls shirts, man, I would be all over it because my life would be that much easier, but I can’t. I can’t comfortably walk around in those kinds of outfits. And I don’t think it should matter. But still, I’ve seen posts from lesbians, on lesbian websites, that say, “Sarah Golden dresses gay.” Well, guess what. I am gay. I’m sorry. There’s no gay clothing store that I go to. It really is just how I’m comfortable.

AE: Did you ever ask The Voice if being gay was going to be a thing? I mean, have you had any conversations with them as to why this show is so different and inclusive from other reality competitions?

SG: I was very up front with the show and I told them from the beginning that I was absolutely interested in the show for a number of reasons. One, because of the contest not being judged based on appearance. And then, two, because they had so many openly gay folks the last year, I said surely y’all have to be accepting of this. And they said, “Absolutely.”

And I swear to God, ya know, no matter how may times I say, it — ’cause I’m going to look like a paid spokesperson [for the show] — this one show really did give a s–t. They really did care about the performers and their well-being, and their comfort level and I did not feel judged one time, and I haven’t, through this whole ordeal. And they are, they really, and they really do care.

And I’ve been totally open and gay and I can be gay the whole time and everyone just laughs along with it and has a good time and I’ve never felt, ya know, I’ve never felt any kind of discomfort for being gay. And everyone has been so cool and that is something that I cannot stress enough.

I am so appreciative of NBC, even if it’s Mark Burnett and the drivers of the show who are the ones who said, “We should totally allow anybody to be in this,” ya know? I don’t know whose idea it was, but I appreciate NBC for giving the gays a place to be, because, I swear to God, they have made major kudos with the “ten percent of the population that doesn’t exist.”

AE: I know you have been playing since high school and that you have a lesbian following, but what do you want to do after The Voice? Do you want to go on tour, do you want to record an album? What do you hope to get from this show in terms of reaching another audience?

SG: Really, I’m not trying to tie it to being gay, and I swear, my whole life does not revolve around being gay, but so much of my music life revolves around the inability to just be myself. When I’m singing, it’s like reading a diary. Like, being a musician is like reading a diary. And if I can’t read the things in my diary, than it doesn’t fricking matter to do music. Know what I mean?

So, with that said, my whole kind of hope, I love being – it’s just a very therapeutic thing and it’s something that I think I was made to do, and ultimately, I would love to – I have a whole, two albums’ worth of stuff that I have never put out. And it’s because I get stuck between work life and music life, and just making time for everything.

So, ultimately, I’d just love to finish, and I know my fans give me grief about it every year for not putting out a new album. I’ve played the [new] songs at shows, they just don’t have anything to take home and listen to. I think my fans would love if I finished at least one album. That would probably be a good starting point.

And then from there, honestly just just get out there. If there is one other person that I can influence through just being able to play and just doing what I like because it’s fun, and some kind of positive effect it has on anyone who’s getting bullied or hated or whatever, and if it makes that person have some sort of hope, I swear, that would be the icing on the cake for me. I don’t want to be a bajillionaire. I sing folk. Let’s be honest; that’s not a very popular genre. But yeah, just knowing that I got my chance and I was able to get out in front of folks and just do what I love. if I could get paid to do what I love, that would be pretty awesome.

AE: What modern artist do you listen to, or you think you have a similar sound or aesthetic to?

SG: People say that I’m a mix between Joan Osborne and Shawn Colvin. I think it’s very true with my stuff at home. It is different, they don’t really have songs that are Joan Osborne meets Shawn Colvin, in terms of that [show] list that we go through, so I think it’s a little more rock, where it’s a little harder on the show. But what I do, I think is much more reserved in that sense. I don’t know if that ‘s modern enough for you.

AE: No, that works. And since it’s Valentine’s Day, are you single?

SG: I am not. I’m engaged. Seven-year relationship.

AE: Oh, wow! Congratulations!

SG: Today is my six-year anniversary. But we’re in a tiff right now about whether it’s six or seven years. It’s six, or more.

AE: Well, that’s awesome. When are you getting married? Do you have any plans for it yet?

SG: We’re working on getting that done in the next year or two. We’re in no crazy hurry ’cause this is Texas and it won’t really matter for legality sake. But we will have a big ceremony and a big to-do here. It’s just a matter of finding a place that we like that has some meaning to us. Because the ceremony is really going to be our biggest thing. It isn’t going to be, “Hey everyone! Come to our wedding!” at some place. Because it doesn’t matter where we’re getting married. To us, it’s the ceremony that’s going to matter the most. Because we’re not going to legally be able to get married in Houston.

AE: You do have that lesbian mayor.

SG: Yeah, we do. I won’t make any comments.

Watch The Voice on Mondays on NBC. Find out more about Sarah on her Twitter and Facebook pages.

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