Let’s take a look at some of the fashion high points and low points from last night’s Ellen-hosted extravaganza. Without further ado:
Cate Blanchett — Love the actress, but you know what this dress made me realize? She has a bone spur sticking out of her bare shoulder! Cate, in the future, you might want to cover both shoulders. Jennifer Hudson — Why, oh why did you wear that weird bolero silver cape thingie? Take it off! Thank you. Much better.
Jennifer Lopez — Kinda looks like a costume from Rome, but I like it. She looks like she might be pregnant, but maybe it’s just the empire waist thing. Hmm.
Gwyneth Paltrow — Interesting. Kind of a blah color, but I think I like the design. Maybe. I know that the hair-to-one-side thing annoys me, though. Why?
Cameron Diaz — Love the hair. The dress? That top part is a bit odd, but I like the flared train at the bottom.
Kirsten Dunst — This dress is just wrong. It’s like a combination between a peacock and an old schoolteacher. Who told you to wear it? Not a good idea.
Kate Winslet — This one, on the other hand, is so right! Kate is gorgeous! Any dress would look good on her.
Penelope Cruz — The bodice is fantastic, but not sure if I’m so into the Big Bird bottom. But you know what would make me love it? If Penelope had brought her girlfriend, Salma Hayek. Hee.
Rachel Weisz — Now, I do really like this one. I think it’s one of my favorites. So shiny! Love the diamond detailing! Love the peek-a-boo train effect. I. Want. It.
Beyonce — Thank you, Beyonce, for looking like a real woman with no bone spurs! And you really rocked that song “Listen” onstage, too. Woo! I’m listening!
Anne Hathaway and Nicole Kidman — What’s with the bows? That’s all I’m asking. Why?
Last but not least — Who wins for Best Suit of the Night? I honestly think that award should go to Milena Canonero (right), who took home the Oscar for Costume Design. Look at the collar! And if you’re gonna wear a bow, that’s the way to do it. But really, I did love Ellen‘s red velvet suit (with the fab white shoes) and Melissa‘s blue tux.
