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RachelWatch: It Came Upon a 1 a.m. Clear

Today: Rachel looks at the health care debate, CPACs new scary cosponsors, and some awesome diplomatic judo.

‘Twas the Fight Before Christmas

Rachel started us off with a blood pressure check by looking at the health care reform debate. After making short work of Senator John McCain’s (R — Arizona) snit over Senator Franken (D — Minnesota) denying Senator Lieberman (I — Connecticut) an extra couple of minutes to speak, she moved on to the grueling (for the Senate) schedule for the weekend ahead.

(Yes, Senate, it’s a big weekend, but some of you might want to do a quick poll on how many of your constituents have ever been asked to pull a double shift, work weekends, or work over Christmas, and how many of them have recently agreed to do so under the threat of getting let go right now in the current job market instead of maybe possibly not getting re-elected in the future.

Give it a rest with the whining, OK?)

Rachel then moved on to the right’s foot-dragging tactics with the health care bill. And then their tying-cement-blocks-to-their-dragging-feet tactics. And then their balancing-anvils-on-the-cement-blocks-tied-to-their-dragging-feet tactics.

When Press Comes to Shove

Rachel praised White House press secretary Robert Gibbs for his “bad-assery” outside President Obama’s meeting with the Chinese premiere in Copenhagen.

She showed a clip of Gibbs going blackberries-to-the-wall when Chinese officials tried to keep members of the American press pool out.

It is kind of sweet to know that in the end, he has their backs. I’m hoping awkward hugs and shoulder-slugs were shared afterward.

Diplobamacy

Oh, Senator Inhofe. Like many superheroes, James Inhofe (R — Oklahoma) is misunderstood by the public. The Truth Squad’s visit to Copenhagen was not everything he imagined it to be.

Senator, I told you to wear a cape and jumpsuit! I begged you!

Rachel also took a look at President Obama’s somewhat more successful trip which, while it didn’t produce binding commitments, did involve some more diplomatic bad-assery. It’s one of the more awesome things I’ve ever heard of happening at an event with the words “international” and “conference” around it.

Talkin’ John Birch Paranoid Blues

Clear your calendar! The 2010 Conservative Political Action Conference is just around the corner and registration is now open!

It’s Feb 18-20 and yes, I’m sure your best beloved will understand if you skimp on that Valentine’s Day gift so you can go.

Or why not go together? Is there anything more romantic than a room full of men wearing tricorn hats with teabags hanging off of them?

I see that Ann CoultnoshestillgetsnoGooglehitsfromme is on the speaker list. I haven’t seen her getting as much airtime as in years past. I will predict right now that she will attempt to launch herself back into the spotlight by saying something calculated to be as offensive as possible.

But why wait to be offended? Rachel noted that the John Birch Society is a cosponsor for CPAC 2010, then took us through a few of their greatest hits just in case you’d forgotten the level of whackadoo that’s coming into play here.

Thomas Frank, the author of The Wrecking Crew: How Conservatives Rule, joined Rachel to talk about why the fringe is getting so much play that American politics looks like a ’70’s Westernwear revival.

Walker: Metaphor Mangler

Speaking of Westernwear, Rachel reported that the mindblowingly dumb Chuck Norris “Would Mary have had aborted Jesus with health care reform?” question is actually gaining some traction.

I can see why, though — it works really well if you ignore absolutely every aspect about the story except the part where Mary was pregnant.

I am really looking forward to this form of intelligent political debate gaining steam: “Would David have fought Goliath if Obama had been in charge and not talked about victory enough?” “Would Solomon have built his temple if he’d been oppressed by capital gains taxes?”

Oh, it’s going to be a treat.

Cocktail Moment

Though the TRMS staff has always done masterful work in its political investigations, I think this long-awaited breakthrough may be Rachel’s proudest moment.

Welcome to a Cocktail Moment that reaches to the very highest levels of our government and some engaging bartending zeal from Rachel.

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