Today: Rachel look at the No on 1 campaign and George W. Bush wants to motivate you.
For Whom the Bellwether Tolls
Rachel started us off with her favorite thing: The MSNBC election animation. You can actually see her draw strength from it.
She was also in a chipper mood because not only is the race for former Congressman John McHugh’s (R — New York) seat heating up, the real fight is between the Republican candidate and the Conservative candidate.
And it reflects a larger shoving match over who will control the Republican Party.
Get a good seat. I have a feeling this could get awesomely crazy.
Maine Squeeze
As you may have noticed, some people can’t just leave equal marriage rights alone and try to start ballot measures to yank them away as soon as they’re granted.
Because why focus your spiritual energies on working in a soup kitchen, running a support group, or mentoring a teenager when you can stop committed couples from visiting each other in the hospital?
I like to think that these people will get their own special pranky section of Hell.
“OK, all you NOMers of the Damned, Old Scratch ruled that you get each get a tall, cool glass of lemonade and five whole minutes to swim in the Tantalus pool.”
“Hooray!”
“But then we put it up to a popular ballot…”
Anyway, gay marriage tends not to do well on the ballot measures, so we have reason to be concerned.
Rachel took a look at the initiative to repeal same-sex marriage rights in Maine and chatted with Jesse Connolly of the No on 1 campaign.
Just as a quick reminder, while you Maine-iacs should be voting No on Question 1, Washingtonians should vote Yes on Referendum 71.
And no matter what state you’re in, there’s still time to jump on a phone bank.
GOP in Exile
Sarah Palin will be speaking at the College of the Ozarks, and normally that would be plenty of occasion for fun, but it turns out that George and Laura Bush have totally trumped her by speaking for the Get Motivated business seminar.
No, wait, I’m sorry: It’s the GET MOTIVATED! “motivational mega-show.” Aren’t you exhausted already?
It’s a business seminar run by two people who do not seem to have realized that Dubya’s oil businesses failed an awful lot.
It also seems to be one of those things that, if you’re lucky, the closest you get to is that one friend of a friend you run into at parties who never shuts up about how fired up he is to succeed.
And if you’re not lucky, it’s one of those things your boss makes you go to as a treat instead of just ordering some freaking pizzas and letting people go home early.
Rachel mocked the daylights out of the whole thing for pretty much the entire segment, and it was great fun.
If anyone goes to one of these and gets to do a ropes course or some trust falls with the Bushes, please keep me informed.
Ms. Information
The Navy’s new semi-amphibious assault vessel, the USS New York, is about to be commissioned. Much of its steel comes from the World Trade Center wreckage, and its special occasion silver might just come from you.
If you would like to buy the USS New York some Tiffany silver off its battleship registry, you are in luck.
Or you could tell it you’re going to buy something off the registry, but actually send it a macramé plant holder that you found at a roadside craft fair that you just knew it would love.
Rachel also noted that a new ABC News poll indicates that only 20% of Americans self-identify as Republicans, and that number drops the minute you stop giving them noogies and let them out of the headlock.
Rachel pointed out that Republicans lost 8 Senate seats in the 2008 election. Senator John Ensign (R — Nevada) was in charge of the Senate Campaign Committee, but it seems he was just a wee bit busy with other things, like bribing and placating the family of his staffer/mistress.
I have a feeling the next head of the Senate Campaign Committee is going to have to go through one heck of an awkward entrance interview.
Spit Take
I think of Rachel as a levelheaded and fair-minded woman, but holy sliding pinstripes, does she dislike the Yankees.
Yankee relief pitcher Mariano Rivera may or may not have been caught on camera deploying the key ingredient in a spitball during a playoff game, and it seemed to be tearing the TRMS staff apart.
Executive producer/general sports geek Bill Wolff stepped in front of the camera to help talk Rachel down.
WARNING: This segment involves a Zapruder film—level analysis of a man hawking out an enormous gobber. Put down the flan before you watch it.
