Well, here we are. It feels rather like a ceasefire at the end of a war, doesn’t it? There were heavy casualties and it’s hard to say who won, but after today, we all get to go home to our families, (who will no doubt find us much changed). So join me, friends, as we say goodbye to Faking It.
Last week ended with Karma rescuing Amy from the jaws of happiness, by informing her that their childhood friend Sabrina was only pretending to be in love with her, which as we all know, is Karma’s move. Heartbroken, Amy banished Sabrina and fell sobbing into Karma’s arms, thinking she at least had sweet, reliable Felix as a consolation prize. Unfortunately, Karma had already set her dewy eyes on Felix, because Karma (for all I love her) is a bit of a teenage Napoleon in her need to win affection on a global scale.
ALL SHALL LOVE ME AND DESPAIR.
Meanwhile, Shane accidentally offended Noah by running off his big mouth, but for once his heart was pure! And finally, Lauren and Liam started their own fake relationship, so that Lauren would gain Instagram followers and Liam wouldn’t have to be homeless.
We open (at the close) with Amy in full breakup recovery mode, denouncing Sabrina’s name to anyone who will listen, and quite a few people who won’t.
AND THIS IS HOW SHE KISSED. THIS DUMB WAY.
Even Karma, who orchestrated this breakup, is a little burnt out on hearing about hearing what a MONSTER Sabrina is, so when her parents and Diane (their poly girlfriend, for those who have forgotten) float the idea of a cleansing fire, she’s all about it.
IMA JUMP IN THIS BITCH LIKE KHALEESI!
Amy tosses in The L Word Season 6 DVD (the fumes of which rushed to deplete the ozone layer and hasten the end of this sad world, in keeping with the will of Ilene Chaiken), and Diane tosses in her pack of cigarettes (the fumes of which she leans into to score one last nicotine buzz). And somewhere amidst all these transformative flames, this happens:
Much like Karma’s dad’s heart attack, no one makes too much of a fuss when Karma’s house burns down, because as always, it’s just a plot device to push Karma and Amy back together. After the blaze has died down, Karma packs her belongings (miraculously unscathed!) and moves into Amy’s room, which doubtless would have been the setting for countless stolen glances and confusing dreams next season.