Archive

“Call the Midwife” recap (5.7): Loose Lips Sink Barges

This week, Call The Midwife delves into the subculture of Bargees, itinerant folks who live on barges. Nurse Crane refers to them as “water gypsies,” which would surely have struck fear in the heart of my Russian grandmother who always warned my mom that gypsies were out to kidnap children. Oh, old people and their unfounded prejudices!

We open this episode in the sleepy hours just after dawn, where we see Patsy cuddled up with Delia. She quickly gets out of bed and sneaks back to Trixie’s room so that no one will notice.

Do we have time to squeeze in some morning sex before rounds?

Across town, we meet our Mum o’ the Week, Daisy, a bargee with a gaggle of kids. She’s turning the barge crank when she collapses on the dock.

Sister Julienne calls on Sister Mary Cynthia, to tell her how much she admires her hard work and perseverance since her attack. She wishes to send MC to the mother house for prayer and reflection, but with Sister Evangelina still gone, they simply can’t spare her. It’s been six months since she left, but they haven’t heard whether or not she’s coming back. Also, the locals keep giving Nonnatus House baskets full of apples, and Sister Monica Joan is NOT feeling it.

Barbara makes her rounds and visits our other Mum o’ the Week, Gina. Gina is in full nesting mode and ready to burst, but her husband Leslie seems less than interested. They live in a brand new flat on the 8th floor of a modern high-rise. This will be important information later.

Don’t worry; babies love lead-based paint!

Dr. Turner and Shelagh meet with Julienne to discuss the latest medical breakthrough: the birth control pill. The Turners are excited by the new possibilities that the pill brings, but Julienne is concerned about the moral implications. And by moral implications, she means the impending sexual revolution. She tells Dr. Turner that she wants to hold a clinic to discuss the pill with the rest of the team.

Back at Nonnatus House, everyone has gone out on rounds, except for Barbara. She invites Tom over, pops on one of Trixie’s records, and they dance and smooch all over the house. Tom is wearing so much Brylcreem that, in the midst of making out against a wall, he leaves a big oil stain with his big greasy head. Good luck explaining that to the sisters.

This is worse than the jizz stain you left in the chapel!

Across town, Patsy and Sister Winifred pay a visit to Daisy on the Molly Belle barge. Daisy is hesitant to accept help from the midwives and tells them that they’ll probably be shipping off to their next port soon. Patsy asks her to come to the clinic so she can get the results of her blood test and free juice for her kids. Daisy’s oldest daughter, Lou, wants to go. Because of their lifestyle, none of the kids are enrolled in school.

That night at dinner, while discussing the Bargee life, Nurse Crane notices the oil stain on the wall. Barbara tries to pass it off as an optical illusion while MJ thinks it’s a sign from the spirits. The next day, MJ tries giving away the apples and talks to Julienne about how much they miss Evangelina. Julienne sends her a letter to ask about her return.

Over at the clinic, Barbara tends to Gina, who feels like her husband doesn’t care about her or the baby. Barbara assures her it’s just nerves, but I think he’s just being a dick. Daisy shows up with her kids, but she only wants to see Patsy. She had another dizzy spell, and Patsy tells her that she is anemic and has low blood pressure. She recommends bedrest in the maternity ward, but Daisy is scared to leave her family. Patsy tells her that she can enroll the kids in school, and they can visit her every day, and Daisy reluctantly agrees. We also find out that Daisy is illiterate, and that she had all four of her children by herself on the boat. Daisy asks Lou is she would prefer to go to school or stay on the boat, and Lou immediately says school.

So you’d rather go to school than clean out the barge toilet? Suit yourself.

That night, Dr. Turner leads a discussion group about the pill with the midwives and Tom. MJ would rather watch TV and enjoy a cookie. They discuss how the pill puts reproduction entirely within the woman’s control, and how some men might not like it. Nurse Crane tells the group that she thinks the pill is brilliant, as she’s been trying to promote condom usage, but none of the local men will do it. She also asks Julienne for permission to say the word “penis” which is hilarious and also insane considering they are all in the medical profession.

Julienne is concerned that the pill will promote promiscuity, and looks to Tom for moral back-up. Tom remains vague and mutters something about the sanctity of marriage. Delia brings up the reality, which is young couples in love who can’t help themselves and want to have sex. Tom says he would counsel them to wait, which is ironic since he was just playing grab ass with Barbara in the parlor.

Can we get a pass on this? Trust me; we will NOT be needing it!

Later that night, Barbara calls him out for keeping mum and he admits that he’s out of his depth, especially when they talk about sex and menstruation (the pill was originally designed to help regulate menstrual cycles). She tells Tom that she doesn’t believe in sex before marriage, but she understands how couples can get swept up in the moment.

Meanwhile, Trixie is at her AA meeting, where she tells the group that she’s been sober for one year. She complains that life without booze can be super boring, and she misses the fun of mixing drinks and partying. However, at least she’s not alone, and she’s made great friendships with her fellow AA members.

Gina goes into labor, and Barbara spends the night caring for her. When she runs out of gas, she sends Leslie to call Nonnatus house for a fresh tank, and Crane soon arrives with reinforcements. Soon, Gina delivers a healthy baby boy, who they name Robert. She confesses to Crane that she doesn’t think Leslie is excited about the marriage or the baby, and Crane assures her that he will adapt. Yet another couple forced into marriage by an unplanned pregnancy.

I’ve got a can of laughing gas and a bag full of biscuits, let get this party started!

Barbara and Crane discuss the situation, and Crane talks about being born out of wedlock. During the war, no one cared much for morals, and Crane had an affair with an air force sergeant. She used douche as birth control and was lucky enough that it worked. The sergeant died in battle, and Crane never regretted the romantic time they had together.

Back at the maternity ward, Daisy’s health is getting better, but she’s overwhelmed by the level of service. Shelagh is asking how she likes her eggs, and Patsy gives her a dressing gown with the maternity ward name stamped on it. It’s an abrupt change from living on a barge and pooping out your own kids!

The moon is full, and a storm is moving into Poplar. Patsy tells Delia that the school children were making fun of the barge kids, and she wishes they could help. Delia wants to take her to Gateway’s Club, a lesbian bar. Patsy says no, claiming that she doesn’t want to be around other women, but Delia just wants to be able to hold her hand and dance with her in public. A lesbian bar in the 60’s? Count me in!

A gay bar? But we don’t even own fedoras or leather wrist cuffs!

Patsy and the midwives wash up the barge kids and give them haircuts and a de-lousing. They also find them new clothes to wear so they can fit in at school. However, Daisy is appalled when she sees them. They don’t smell or look like her kids, and Daisy is furious that Patsy would interfere so much. She storms out of the ward and takes the kids home to the barge.

The storm blows in and gale force winds knock out the power lines. The barge rocks on the waves and Daisy goes into labor. Lou runs off the boat in search of Patsy. Across town, Gina starts getting sick and Leslie calls for a midwife. Trixie is stuck at the clinic racing between two mums in labor while Tim turns a crank to keep a string of lights on. It’s full moon madness all over town.

Patsy arrives at the barge to find a community of bargees looking after the children. They don’t know Daisy, but they’re part of the Bargee community, and they stick together. Patsy has them clear out so she can examine Daisy, who apologizes for her harsh words. Lou, who was on deck to help with the delivery, is thankfully spared and sent to play with the other kids.

Sorry, I didn’t mean to BARGE in, get it?

Get off my boat.

Nurse Crane checks in on Gina, but with the power out, she’s forced to hoof it up eight flights of stairs. She diagnoses her with post-delivery preeclampsia (aka Lady Sybil disease for you Downton fans), and the family has to make their way down the eight flights as windows get smashed in and Gina pukes over the stair railing. The only positive outcome is that Leslie springs into action, realizing how much he loves his wife and child.

Patsy helps Daisy deliver a baby girl, and Daisy asks her to wait on cutting the cord. She wants to enjoy a few moments of connection with her baby while she is still physically part of her. Everyone is healthy and happy.

The next morning, Julienne sets out to find someone to fix the phone line, but she encounters huge pile of debris. The storm knocked down some walls, and she watches as Fred tries to clean it up and clear a path for the midwives. Suddenly, Sister Evangelina’s head appears over the rubble. Julienne is delighted to see her, and before she can climb over the rubble, Evangelina has already ordered the phone lines re-routed to the post office. Evangelina then has a joyful reunion with MJ, and they quote scripture together and get some cake.

Damn the man! Save the Empire!

But Evangelina has come back changed: she confesses to Julienne that she suffered a stroke while she was away, and her hand is still damaged. She spent several weeks recovering from paralysis but took it as a challenge and a sign from God. Evangelina tells Julienne that the world keeps changing, and they must adapt with it.

Still a better time than the gay bar

Speaking of adapting, Patsy and Delia go to the lezzy bar and dance together. Ugh, I would watch an entire show just about that bar.

This would be so nice if the DJ stopped making siren noises and calling us bitches

Next week is our final episode of the season! Are you excited? Tweet me your feels @ChelseaProcrast

Lesbian Apparel and Accessories Gay All Day sweatshirt -- AE exclusive

Related Articles

Leave a Reply

Back to top button