Previously on Wynonna Earp, Wynonna found out that Bobo is hiding Revenants in the trailer park, the Earp girls found out Henry is actually Doc Holliday, and we found out Doc is on a mysterious revenge mission.
We open with Wynonna running around the house in a white dress, so you know right off the bat it’s a dream. She’s following the sound of Waverly’s disembodied voice, which is calling out Willa’s name. Wynonna hears a scream and runs to the staircase, where an uncharacteristically stoic Waverly calls her Willa and points to her dress. Wynonna realizes that she’s wearing what Willa wore the last day she saw her. Wynonna hears another voice say, “Get them.” Wynonna points to the pile of bones at her feet and says that she has been, she’s been killing them; she’s been trying. “Not all of them,” the voice responds, and Wynonna turns around to see her little big sister standing there.
Wynonna screams.
Waverly rushes in and closes a window and brings Wynonna water, easing her out of her nightmare. Waverly blames the prairie winds because of course she does, and tries to get her sister to drink the water, but Wynonna wants beer instead.
Waverly knows all this killing is affecting Wynonna, and that she has to start dealing with these feelings now, because there are a hell of a lot more Revenants out there. She tells Wynonna that she was calling out Willa’s name in her sleep. She asks if Willa had pierced ears; Waverly was only six when she died, she’s starting to lose the details. Wynonna says that’s how you lose people, one piece at a time. But that if they can just kill The Seven, her and Waverly will be able to think and dream about Willa and Ward without it tied so strongly to such a painful memory.
Speaking of painful, across the town border Levy, now reduced to a melty-faced corpse-monster, chews off his own foot and crawls back across the town line, where existing doesn’t suck quite as much.
Wynonna heads to the station to find Dolls shirtless and working out. He says that the thermostat is broken in the building, which explains why he’s shirtless, but not why he’s working out at the station. Dolls tells Wynonna that the Chief Executive Officer, who is also a judge, requested a meeting, and she has to be on her best behavior because this man can shut down the Black Badge Division if he wants to.
This judge, Cryderman, has a history with Wynonna and is an obvious shitticket right off the bat because he brings Dolls a glass of whiskey and flat-out ignores Wynonna, who is wound tight, her knees bouncing as she tries to keep every awful word that pops into her head to stay there.
After some epic eye rolls, she finally speaks up, but all it gets her is Cryderman calling her a bad seed. She asks him about Bobo Del Ray, and Dolls backs her up, showing Cryderman pictures of him receiving a shady shipment. Cryderman doesn’t really want to do any work during hunting season, but Dolls uses this comment as an opening to butter him up regarding ducks to get the search warrant he was after. Wynonna is grossed out.
As they’re leaving, Cryderman says that the way Wynonna turned out was just too bad, because her father was a legend, all as if she wasn’t STANDING RIGHT THERE.
Despite Wynonna’s disgust, Dolls doesn’t feel bad about kissing the judge’s ass, because now they have their search warrant. Wynonna wants just to stroll into the trailer park and shoot Bobo in the face, but that would cause too much chaos. Instead, they’re going to do things the right way, with a few tricks up their sleeve. Like having Waverly take photos and Doc ID Revenants.
So Waverly takes her spot in a sniper’s nest, complete with a little bag of snacks.
Wynonna and Dolls search Bobo’s trailer while Bobo stands around making gross comments at Wy. Dolls asks Bobo about the crate he received, but he plays dumb and makes more crude comments, which pushes Wynonna over the edge. She jumps on a car, shoots Peacemaker into the air, and demands someone hand over whoever’s left of The Seven.
Waverly sees this go down and knows things don’t go well when her sister does her thing. Bobo’s men attack Wynonna, but she takes them down pretty easily. Dolls ends the chaos by slapping cuffs on Bobo, who spots Waverly as he’s being taken away. And not just spots, more like looks directly at as though he knew she’d be there. She ducks, but she knows she’s been made.
Wynonna drives away, but someone clings to the bottom of her truck to come with.
Back at the station, Dolls is pissed that Wynonna went all rogue cowgirl at the trailer park. Dolls is going to talk to the judge alone to try to smooth this over, and as he storms out, Wynonna tells him that Waverly thinks someone tipped Bobo off that they were coming, because the trailer park was empty.
Bobo is chained up in an interrogation room when he gets a visitor in the form of Waverly Earp, Brave Little Toaster.
She asks Bobo who told him she would be watching, all while keeping her back pressed against the wall, keeping as much distance between them as possible until Bobo kicks a chair at her and asks her to sit. She does, then gets to what she really wanted to ask: Why did he choose her to manipulate when she was younger? She thinks it was because she was gullible or weak, but she is as far from weak as it gets. He chose her because she was angry. She is startled by this; she spends her life being smiley and bubbly, how could anyone call her angry? But she has depths that neither of them knows, and though he’s a creepy nogoodnik who wears too much fur, he’s not dumb.
Wynonna comes in and kicks her baby sister out, turning the camera away and pulling the cover over the two-way mirror, ready to give Bobo what’s coming to him.
He asks her for a lap dance, so she pulls Peacemaker on him. He magics the gun to his own hand (which, .cheating) and makes more gross comments about her and her sister, his hand sizzling all the while. Before Wynonna can do anything else, the door swings open and Bobo greets the woman who powerwalks in as Ms. Stone. She gives Wynonna the eye as she releases Bobo and leads him out of the interrogation room. And not the good eye. The challenging eye.
Wynonna storms out of the precinct and angrily gets in her truck, but didn’t check the backseat even though you ALWAYS CHECK THE BACKSEAT, so the man who was hiding there pops up and puts a knife to her throat. He tells her to hand over her phone and says they’re going to pay Bobo’s men another visit. Wynonna’s misandry is cranked up to eleven, so even though she does what he says to avoid getting flayed, she’s vocally salty about it.
His eyes flash Revenant red as they peel away, and the speed at which the truck takes off makes Waverly and Doc decide to follow close behind.
Dolls goes to see the judge, who is furious, and tells Dolls, and I quote, “If you hire someone for their ass, you’re responsible for covering it.” Dolls does not love that, because HE’S not a sexist monster, and even says Cryderman is out of line. Cryderman says that if Dolls doesn’t get his Division in order soon, he’s going to his superiors.
Waverly pulls some Fury Road maneuvering to stop Wynonna in her truck (impressing herself in the process) and asks why her sister zipped off in such a rush when she sees Wynonna, who used the distraction to take back control of the situation, pointing Peacemaker at her stowaway.
The Revenant has a picture of The Seven with her dad’s body that he’ll happily provide if Wynonna will help him out, which does pique her interest. But then Doc recognizes the man, calls him Fish and hugs it out, the girls watching in extreme confusion.
Across town, in a barn, Bobo is getting seduced and scolded by the woman who released him from the precinct, and she’s a little…unhinged. She hears voices and wishes she didn’t.
He calls her Constance aka Ms. Stone, but she strangles him with magic and calls herself Mrs. Clootie. Which…I’d stick with Stone. Anyway, I think we’ve found our Stone Witch. She wants to know why Bobo is so obsessed with the Earp girls but instead of letting him answer she stabs him with her stiletto and makes him lick it up. It’s strange and gross and made my eyebrows twistier than they’ve ever been, but it’s still weirdly badass.
At Shorty’s, Wynonna asks Fish about the picture, but he won’t give it to her until after she helps him. You see, he got into some trouble with someone he loves, and when Wynonna says he wouldn’t be the first to be lead astray by a hot chick, he says it wasn’t a chick at all.
The man Fish fell for was an old-timey photographer he sat for once. Every time they regenerate, they meet in the same spot on the same day, but this time, he didn’t show, so Fish is worried. Fish says that as soon as he knows what happened to his fella, he’ll let Wynonna shoot him, so it’s a win-win for them.
Fish’s photographer is the one who took The Seven’s hunting photos, including when they hunted Earps, which is why he can give it to her. Fish sends Wynonna to a guy named Vinny who runs a crab shack, and Doc is worried about her torturing someone for information, but she puts on a brave face and stomps all the way to the crab shack, kicking open the door when she gets there.
Wynonna ties Vinny up and ignores him mumbling about “Earps cutting deals” as she tries to get information about the photographer. She picks up a fishing hook and hears her dad’s voice egging her on. But it’s not her dad, and she’s not losing her mind (yet), it’s Vinny throwing his voice. Wynonna puts the hook through his fingertip and then almost in his eye before he gives up the info; Bobo had Doc drag Levy over the town line. She backs off, but he warns her that they won’t, not until she’s “in pieces like your big sister Willa.” This earns him a bullet to the brain.
Wynonna goes back to Fish and says that as soon as she gets the picture, she’ll tell him what she found out. Fish explains that he doesn’t exactly HAVE the photo, he just knows where it is. And it’s in the basement of the civic building. Which is also the police station. Wynonna pretends to be scandalized but just kidding she’s actually kind of excited. Doc is too, and starts talking about getting some dynamite, but they already HAVE dynamite, and her name is Wynonna.
Wynonna goes down to the boiler room in her tank top and turns on the flirt, asking the mechanics how they work in these hot conditions, and is surprised when they turn around and are actually women. She barely flinches and just changes tactics slightly, twirling her hair and asking sweetly for help.
But they’re unresponsive, so they send Doc in instead, and he gets them to help set off an alarm.
Doc sneaks into the Black Badge Division office, but Ms. Stone follows, and he recognizes her, and not in the same fun way he recognized Fish. She freezes him with magic and speaks in tongues (or maybe French) and then disappears, leaving him wobbly and a little shaken.
Wynonna and Fish steal some boxes and make a break for it, but run into Dolls in the hallway.
Wynonna’s face game is so strong that Dolls looks the other way while they scurry out.
Wynonna goes through the boxes they stole, and even though it’s all negatives, not actual photos, the dates line up, so Wynonna says she’ll take Fish to where Vinny said his boyfriend was.
They head to the town line, and Fish stays behind while Wynonna and Doc check things out, which is for the best because all that’s there is Levy’s chewed off foot. Wynonna is pissed that Doc was the one who tied him up out here, leaving him in torture territory. When they find him, back in the woods, he’s half-melted, looking like a cross between a burn victim and a zombie. Fish holds Levy and is glad to be back together. He tells Wynonna that living in fear of the heir, in fear of being sent back to hell at any moment, is no life. He believes she’ll be the one to end the curse, to end the cycle they’ve all been stuck in for years, and he’s glad for it.
Wynonna tells Fish and Levy that she’ll shoot them on three, but pulls on one like a doctor giving a shot.
In her barn, Connie Clootie is dressed in funeral black, singing All the Pretty Little Ponies to some half-built skeletons like the psychopath she is. So it seems these are her boys – sons, possibly, but it’s unclear – and Bobo has been finding their bones for her to make them complete. Once he does so, she’ll get him out of the triangle of doom. Though it seems the appearance of Doc Holliday has thrown her off a bit.
Doc is mad at Wynonna for…I don’t know honestly. Being merciful? I think he’s mad because he got called out for dragging Levy across the down line and didn’t like being faced with his choices. But Wynonna is sorry not sorry. This kill was not easy, but it was easier than the rest of them. It was easier to let them find peace before killing them, because even though they’re Revenants, they’re people too. They have feelings, just like anyone else. Doc doesn’t understand this, though, because he was at the bottom of the well like Samara from the Ring for so long, his thoughts eventually were reduced to just revenge, revenge, revenge. Targeted mostly at Connie, who put him down there in the first place.
And that’s when Wynonna realizes that Doc isn’t in town to help her and her family after all. He has his own vendetta. She can’t live like that; she needs some kind of code or she’ll end up like him.
He says she’s more like him than she thinks and then he kisses her. And despite the fact that it must feel like a caterpillar is trying to eat her face, she kisses him back, and they do it in the woods.
After……..just, after, Wynonna goes to check Dolls’ progress developing the photos. He hasn’t found the photo of The Seven yet, but even if they don’t find it, Wynonna took down three Revenants, so she’ll file today under win. She’s had a change of heart and is going to try to let more of the Revs find peace before she takes them down, because she can’t be fueled by revenge or it will eat away at her from the inside like an acid. As if in reward for her new outlook, Dolls gives her a photo taken before The Incident of Willa, Wynonna and Waverly, happy as can be.
After Wynonna leaves, Dolls finds a pic of The Seven with a body strung up between them and thinks it looks familiar. And if it does, it’s because it’s the same as the photo in the judge’s office, captioned, “The death of Josiah Earp,” Josiah being Wyatt’s son. So Ward wasn’t The Seven’s first rodeo, turns out.
What did you think of “Diggin’ Up Bones”?
Still no Officer Haught, but I read an interview with Emily Andras that said she’ll be featured more heavily in the back half of the season, so have hope! Here are some of our favorite #HaughtDamn tweets from this week:
“bag of chaos” yeah, I’d say that pretty well describes Wynonna #WynonnaEarp #haughtdamn
– Adrienne. (@legacymermaid) 30 April 2016
So I mean when I said, “make me love Wynonna more”, I didn’t actually think it was possible. SILLY ME. #WynonnaEarp #HaughtDamn
– Nik (@njnic23) 30 April 2016
“You’re a hot mess in tight jeans.” SO she’s pretty much my perfect woman. #WynonnaEarp #HaughtDamn
– Call Me Root (@CloneNic) 30 April 2016
BOOBS ARE BETTER THAN EVERYTHING!!! #WynonnaEarp #Wynonnaism #HaughtDamn
– Kimber (@KimberGracie) 30 April 2016
I’m glad we’re all in agreement that boobs are better than dynamite. #WynonnaEarp #HaughtDamn
– My Name Is Kitty (@SongOfSupercat) 30 April 2016
Wynonna, your head is not for carrying things but also, do you #WynonnaEarp #HaughtDamn
– Jessica Buonocore (@jayelkru) 30 April 2016
Waverly you cute peanut, try not to die before your gayness is confirmed… Or after… Just DON’T DIE. #WynonnaEarp #HaughtDamn #WayHaught
– Rachel (@RWatkinsphoto) 30 April 2016
Levi and Fish just broke my heart a bit and Wynonna’s pained expression broke it the rest of the way #WynonnaEarp #HaughtDamn
– MicNic12 (@micnic1291) 30 April 2016
The women have all the power on this show. Good and evil. Amazing! #WynonnaEarp #Haughtdamn
– Jennifer (@JenKasper81) 30 April 2016
Waverly Earp! We just talked about reconnaissance without backup! *throws bulletproof vest at TV* #haughtdamn #wynonnaearp
– Lara (@RSMayfair) 1 May 2016
