“Lost Girl” recap (5.16): Fae-thee-well

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Alas, that’s what happens. Bo drops her head and rises, eyes blazing blue. She proceeds to group suck the greater metropolitan Toronto area. Only Bo chooses who lives now and everyone’s dying–dudes at bus stops, moms in minivans, everyone.

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Everyone but the folks in that Disco RV, that is. Lauren has fashioned herself an improvised sedative gun with her old Karen Beattie-days skills. Dyson says he is glad they are on the same team. Please take that olive branch in the spirit in which it was extended, dueling shipper teams

Then, in a fandom miracle, Dyson becomes an advocate for Doccubus. He tells Lauren he used to always worry about Bo, but not when she was with Lauren. Doctor Hotpants tries to wiggle her way out of the hot seat and acknowledges it was her who pushed Bo away. But Dyson won’t give up that easily. He starts showing Lauren gif after gif of how perfect they are together. Has she seen all the Tumblrs dedicated to their relationship? How much they should be endgame. How it’s messy and complicated, but worth it. And, just like that, a wolf becomes women’s best friend.

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And then Lauren offers up her own shipper olive branch. It’s that frequent fandom compromise when it comes to The Triangle. She says she doesn’t worry about Bo anymore, either. Because she knows when she is gone, Dyson will still be there for her. See, can’t we all just get along? Can’t we all just get along?

Their kumbaya moment is interrupted by the folks in the front of the bus who notice an Aurora Bo-realis (see what I did there?) lighting up the night sky. They realize everyone’s favorite succubus is getting her group suck on and the only reason they’re not dead too is their Lucky Horseshoe. This realization raises the gang’s terror level to yellow i.e. I pee my pants a little. Oh, Lost Girl, think of the lucrative Depends product placement money you missed out on here.

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So Bo finishes feasting on the city and then goes all Succu-Hulk voice, yammering on about being the most powerful Fae and having everyone kneel at her feet. It’s your standard megalomaniacal rant and/or Donald Trump’s stump speech. Proud Papa Hades tells her the next step is to fill the empty vessels with his will and raise an army. Yo, pops, if everyone is already dead, what do you need an army for?

Among the few remaining undead–but not in that “Brains! Brains!” kind of way–is Tamsin. She wakes from her long suck (ugh, sorry, everything related to Succubus feeding eventually ends up sounding like Cinemax After Dark) and finally has that Tam-Tam gleam back in her eyes. She retrieves a key Bo has kiss-gifted her and proceeds to let herself out while cutely singing, “If you want to know if she loves you so, it’s in her kiss.”

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As daylight breaks, the gang surveys the damage. Everyone is pretty convinced Bo is an evil killing machine now, except Kenzi who will not give up. But, don’t worry, they’re not giving up on her either.

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