“Lost Girl” recap (5.13): There will be blood

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At the clinic, Lauren and Tamsin are passing some totally not awkward time together. Lauren is feeling foolish and all-too human. Tamsin is feeling uncomfortable and all-too mortal. Lauren notices the mortal part, too, or more specifically, the falling locks of hair from her head. Tamsin tells her it’s nothing, just a sign that she is dying. No biggie, just impending death. Lauren being Lauren, she immediately goes into Doctor Hotpants mode and starts to science the problem.

The series of questions that follow don’t help the one-sided awkwardness. In the last 24 hours has Tamsin: Eaten anything unusual? Touched any creams? Done anyone sexually? Tamsin can’t leave this line of inquiry fast enough, but the doc won’t be dissuaded and joins her at the bar to continue going over symptoms. Poor Tam-Tam, is there something opposite of an apple you could eat to keep the doctor away?

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Back at the family dinner, Bo is acting like a sulky teenager and refusing to eat her sea urchin. Ugh, dad, why can’t we have tater tots like a normal family. But then Jack brings in the main course–Christian and Victoria. Bo insists she isn’t hungry, so Aife helps herself instead. Wow, am I glad Bo did not learn her table manners from her mom.

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Then Hades makes another horse allusion to Bo, in case the horseshoe “weapon” connection wasn’t quite clear enough yet. He also asks Bo if he has ever lied to her. Bo isn’t sure. People, can we all please just stop trusting the devil? Like if there’s one person in the entire world to not trust, that person would be the ruler of the underworld. Instead this unholy parental tag-team casts dispersions on Trick. Which, granted, is fair–he has lied and hidden the truth from Bo repeatedly. But just because grandpa hasn’t always been honest doesn’t mean mom and dad are necessarily total truth tellers.

Jack lets out a sigh and says, “It’s time we told her the truth.” You know what time it is? It’s time Bo figured out what’s true on her own instead of listening to a string of people claim to know her destiny. Trick. Rainer. Hades. Girl, live the life you choose–remember?

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Instead, Aife spins her tale of how her father Trick wrote a truce in his blood between the Light and Dark, but she refused to choose. That part we knew. When Aife killed a Dark Fae elder, Trick handed her over to the Dark to maintain the peace–and she was imprisoned, tortured and went mad. That part we also knew. But then she claims Jack saved her and Bo was born in hell out of their love. That part is new–and highly unlikely.

Jack says it is time for them to rise together as one big hellfire family. Perhaps, he says, all this time she has chosen the wrong side of the family. Well, at least Bo has the good sense to get up and stomp off at this point.

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Bo stumbles away, back to her car and is about to indulge herself with a good cry on the steering wheel. But then Aife pops into the passenger seat and asks the most pressing question in all of Lost Girl history: What are you doing? But, seriously, Bo–did you think Hades was good? Aife calls Bo out for being way off her game and says they’re going to send him back to hell. Finally, some good parenting.

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