Archive

“Rosewood” recap (1.2): No Such Thing as TMI

Within the first five minutes of this week’s Rosewood, we were subject to watching straight people make out with and groping each other for several scenes. We should start a One Million Lesbians group to try and protest such a thing!

While Rosie is being a perfect gentleman and not taking advantage of his drunk crush, Detective Annalise Villa is being anything but ladylike and is punching some dude in the bar because he grabbed her arm, yet everyone says she has anger issues. Sorry, if some dude is grabbing me by the arm and won’t let go when I tell him to stop, HE’S GETTING PUNCHED.

Anyways, lets cut to the chase: Rosie gets a call during his morning-after breakfast date with Nicole Ari Parker, asking him to get to the police station and help the captain who is feeling under the weather. While he is there, the station gets a call about a human foot found buried on the beach and he runs off to try and land the job. Which brings me to my first unanswered question: Why does Rosie have to beat everyone to the crime scene in order to get the job? I don’t see any other pathologists trying to take it away from him.

Rosie takes it upon himself to head to the beach even though the cops told him not to, where he starts throwing around all the information he knows about severed feet, ultimately landing him the job, which then pisses off Detective Annalise. He better be careful because she can throw a mean right hook!

After the beach, Rosie makes his way to the lab to find his sister Pippy and her fiance TMI doing what they do best: WORKING. Oh, and singing “Lady Marmalade” from Moulin Rouge with each other, which I told my wife we should sometime and she didn’t seem into it. At this point I am starting to feel like Pippy and TMI are only meant to be props in the background to make sure Fox meets some type of LGBT diversity quota.

Back at the police station, Detective Annalise is called into the captain’s office to tell her she needs to see a mental health professional, due to not being able to handle the loss of her husband-and she is getting a partner. Rosie storms in with a cooler of supplies for the sick Captain, who looks less than thrilled at Rosie’s new life-changing plan for him. (Second unanswered question: Can people who are not part of the police force just barge into a police Captains office like that? Especially while he is talking to someone else about a very serious topic!)

In order to kill time until the lab results on the foot come through, Rosie follows Detective Villa to the local watering hole and tries to get her to open up about her feelings and asking her questions about her life. Their dynamic is actually very annoying to me, its like flirting but angrier and more childish. They also play a round of pool, meaning TMI and Pippy are back at the lab DOING ALL THE WORK.

Once they get the results back from the lab, the prints on the foot belong to a woman who gave a pedicure to the person and they were able to identify who the foot belongs to: a well off businessman who is part owner of a match making business.

They start to question people involved with the match maker, including his wife and his fiancée. SCANDAL. They locate his business partner (who happens to be at a swanky party in Miami that only seems to have beautiful women everywhere. A move to Miami is in my future.) in hopes she can answer some questions and hands over his work computer for evidence. If only they could find the rest of his body!

Later that night, Rosie heads to his mothers house for movie night where he then tells her he has taken himself off the heart transplant list (I forgot to mention he has a heart condition-my bad) and she is devastated, which she has every right to be. He leaves because his mom “can’t even look at him” and goes into the office to work, where Pippy and TMI suddenly show up, further convincing me that these two may never have a life outside of the lab and are basically at his beck and call whenever he wants. Rosie asks them to listen to a voicemail from the victim’s sister and then puts them to work on more tests from the severed foot, where they find more information that leads Rosie back to the precinct to fight off Detective Annalise.

I’m actually going to stop here because, to be honest, this episode was so boring and it feels wrong to even try and make it seem otherwise. The exact same thing is being done in every scene: Rosie takes a case, argues with the female detective in a childlike manner, goes back to the lab to force the lesbians into working overtime, goes back to weird flirting with detective, etc., etc.

Sure, there is a dinner scene later at Rosie’s mothers house which offers us a glimpse into what TMI and Pippy are like outside of the lab-approximately five whole seconds of seeing them cuddling on the couch and then giggling in the background. BIG DEAL.

Aside from putting the lesbians in the corner, the show has way too much Rosie. I know he is the protagonist and all, but his cheesy personality and overly white teeth are actually getting on my nerves and I wish they would balance out the amount of times he is on camera with some of the other characters.

Oh, and in case you wanted to know, in the end we find out the guy with the severed foot was killed by his wife and his fiancé. But even that was uneventful.

Follow Erin Faith Wilson on Twitter: @erinfaithwilson

Lesbian Apparel and Accessories Gay All Day sweatshirt -- AE exclusive

Related Articles

Leave a Reply

Back to top button