“Carmilla” recap (2.13 & 2.14): So much at stake

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When we last saw the Silas gang, Laura was trying to get the goods on the board from Vordenberg, when they were interrupted by a very nude, and very dead vampire. Well, not exactly a vampire anymore. Enter JP. You see, LaFontaine went and Frankensteined JP into Will’s staked corpse. (Vamps hold up remarkably well, apparently.) Perry is PISSED about the whole thing—so much so that she slips on LaF’s pronoun while she’s scolding her BFF and trying to get Carmilla on her side. LaF, however, is utterly pleased with themself, and it is kind of impressive.

Perry needs to go bake some of her anger into cupcakes, so she bounces, leaving JP to address his growing hunger pangs. The thing is, since LaF used a vampire’s body, they essentially turned JP into vamp, too. I guess it beats living in a USB stick. Carmilla figures this out pretty quickly when he dives at her Cup o’ Blood.

Screen Shot 2015-07-17 at 9.48.28 AMThe world is a vampire, brah.

She and LaF send him off to get dressed, leaving Laura and Vordenberg alone. Vordernberg tells Laura that Carmilla has a pretty nasty reputation, but Laura knows that Carm has turned over a new leaf, with all the saving and sacrificing and sexytimes. Vordernberg tells her that, once upon a time, Carmilla was betrothed to his great, great, great, great, grandfather. His ggggpaps was so devoted that even when she was turned into a vampire, he tried to protect her. In return, Carmilla slaughtered his whole family. Oops.

Screen Shot 2015-07-17 at 10.51.28 AMMy ears were burning….with the fires of hell.

Vordernberg leaves with a quickness, and Carmilla and Laura are left to deal with that bombshell. I have to say, Laura takes it pretty well and Carm is like, “Come on, who doesn’t like to watch the world literally burn when they are young and foolish?” Laura decides that a good old fashioned protest might help fight the Corvae Corp. She wants to involve Danny, whose name is like a tiny stake in Carmilla’s heart. Laura is not feeling the jealously right now, though. It’s kind of killing her “saving the world” boner.

Screen Shot 2015-07-17 at 10.07.10 AMCarm, can’t we just cuddle and pretend that I don’t have unrealistic expectations of our relationship?