“Rizzoli & Isles” Subtext Recap (6.04): Date night at the museum


So now that the important business is dealt with, the ladies turn their attention to this week’s murder of the week. A guy in a nice Italian suit has been shot and stuffed in a refrigerator. See, not all leftovers are worth stealing.


Back in the autopsy room Maura warns Jane that someone is here. OK, that’s a creepy thing to say while standing over a dead body, lady. Jane is done guessing the names of random people so she tells Maura to be more clear. Turns out a FBI agent is waiting in her office.

You know what that means, right? A jurisdictional pissing match! Normally I’d just tell them to whip out a ruler and be done with it. But, come on, we all know Jane’s will be bigger. The FBI guy can sense this so he tells her their murder victim is a notorious and high-priced, like $10 million a heist, thief from Europe.


Jane goes to see Maura, because that’s what Jane always does. But also because they think this theft involved a high-priced (like $10 million-plus high-priced) painting and Jane knows her girlfriend’s many areas of expertise include art. Jane asks Maura how many museums in the area would have such valuable work. Maura lists off several: Boston Museum of Fine Art, Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum, Peabody. Hold up, Peabody like Helena Peabody? I mean, it makes sense. Of course Maura would know cultured, high-society power lesbians like Helena. Has this crossover been written yet? Make it happen, Internet.

Maura further proves her cultural expertise by recognizing the symmetrical oblong adhesive residue on the victim’s lapel as a sticker from the Boston Museum of Art. She tells Jane she would have recognized it too if she had gone on a date with her to a crime scene photography exhibit there, like she asked her to. See, ladies, there’s no wrong time to give your girlfriend a hard time about not doing what you want.


Jane and Korsak go to the BMA to talk with its curator but he is an uncooperative dick, which automatically puts him at the top of the suspect list. But everyone agrees his glasses are too thick and nebbish to make him a true contender. Also nothing has been reported stolen so it’s making this whole investigating a theft thing difficult.

Also difficult is the Dirty Robber’s plumbing problem. Korsak and Mama R have enlisted Frankie to fix the bad pipes. I’m not sure if being the son of a plumber automatically makes you an expert plumber. But, hey, gotta give the kids something embarrassing to do each episode.


Jane goes to see Maura again, because besides solving murders that’s her main job in life. The camera must be operated by Jane’s subconscious because, damn, did it slow-pan up Maura’s legs before she got there. Together they theorize about the non-existent art heist. Maura found specks of modern-day blue paint. So they think the thief slipped a forgery into the museum. But how will they find it if the curator isn’t cooperative. Well, you see, this is where it really pays off to have a rich, cultured girlfriend.

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