“Orange is the New Black” recap (3.10): A Tittin’ and a Hairin’

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Not gonna lie: This is a brutal episode of Orange is the New Black. Consider this a TRIGGER WARNING.

We open in the white trash squalor of Pennsatucky’s childhood, where a 10 year old Tucky is panicking because she just got her first period. Her mother assures her that she isn’t dying, she’s just becoming a woman, or as she calls it “a tittin’ and a hairin’.” Mom tells Tucky that boys are gonna want things from her (namely sex) and it’s best to just let them “do their business” and get on with it. They then celebrate with chocolate fudge and Mountain Dew. This is how the seed of rape culture is planted.

or1 I don’t know mom, this sounds pretty fucked up

Back at Litchfield, Officer Donuts tries to apologize to Tucky for groping her and perving out at the duck pond. He brings her a shirt full of donuts and tells her he really likes her, and Tucky accepts his behavior as totally normal. Oh girl, no.

Leanna leads a group of Normans in some shouting about feelings, where every woman takes a turn screaming out things that annoy them. One lady really hates papaya, so I’m glad she got that off her chest. Caputo tells them to stop screaming, and they complain about religious intolerance.

or2 WHY ARE THEY RE-MAKING POINT BREAK!?

In the cafeteria, Alex confronts Lolly about her stalker journal, and a guard tries to break them up. Lolly claims innocence and shows her own notebook, claiming the one Alex has isn’t even in her handwriting. Alex feels like she’s going off the deep end, and gets shots for her paranoia. Meanwhile, everyone is celebrating the guilty verdict for Judy King, and starts rooting for her to get sent to Litchfield.

or3 Maybe Dottie dropped the ball on purpose, maybe she didn’t. Either way, Racine won

Piper and Stella recruit Maria, Maritza, and Flaca for panty duty, and they eagerly sign up. Martiza is psyched that she and Flaca will be “panty twinsies” again, which I can only assume is code for something sexual. Please let it be code for something sexual. Stella is all turned on by Piper’s business skills, and tries to make out with her in the yard, but Piper brushes her off. Stella thinks she needs to do some processing, but Piper assures her she doesn’t feel guilty or tortured about what happened….because she’s a sociopath? Fucking Piper, you guys. Alex sees them flirting and gets upset.

or4 OMG I can’t wait to get all up in your panties

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