“Pretty Little Liars” recap (6.5): In Which Aria is played by a Tennis Ball, and it Slays

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You guys, last night’s episode of Pretty Little Liars was a veritable cornucopia of chills, thrills, and Tippi the Bird tattoos! Hold onto your fine china (aka your vagina), cuz we’re about to get into it!

We open with Spencer in a dark, deserted hallway, following a ghostly girl dancer as she twirls and Twylas around. You may recognize her as Maddie Ziegler from Dance Moms/those Sia videos/your future nightmares. Ziegler does an interpretive dance around a decaying old bathroom, pirouetting from tub to tub while Spencer finds an old pair of shoes with C. DiLaurentis scrawled on them.

Screen Shot 2015-06-30 at 8.23.05 PM

I WANNA SWIIIIING FROM THE CHANDELIERS! FROM THE CHANDELIIIIIIIIIARS!

Screen Shot 2015-06-30 at 8.22.53 PMI think that pot cookie just started kicking in

I’m just gonna say it: this is the best cold open PLL has ever done. It’s creepy and weird and hilarious and I can’t get enough. Give Spencer all the drugs, is what I’m saying.

The next day, Spencer is telling Aria about her dance dream, convinced that she’s seen the creepy bathroom before. Aria reminds her that everything we see while stoned isn’t real, which is true because my laptop is NOT made of chocolate and I had to learn that the hard way. MOVING ON.

Screen Shot 2015-06-30 at 8.26.38 PM Ugh, Spencer, just use your drug trips as fashion inspiration like I do!

Aria says that Spencer is giving her cramps, which describes most of my relationships with hot girls (I feel you, Montgomery!). Spencer’s mom wants her to go for valedictorian, which is crazy because Spencer’s practically missed a semester of school. Spencer is chowing down on pot cookies, despite it being morning time.

Screen Shot 2015-06-30 at 8.25.48 PMWake and Bake-d goods

Mona surprises Hanna in her kitchen, because she’s obvs the first person she wants to see. She is scared that Ali is plotting revenge, when she should be scared that A/Charles is still on the loose. Man, people will NOT give Alison a break in this town. Hanna tells her that Ali just stays at home and goes to church now, and Mona is like, “Rosewood has a Satanic church now? Hail Beelzebub!”. Mona is called into the precinct on account of faking her death, and she asks Hanna to give her a ride.

Screen Shot 2015-06-30 at 8.27.57 PM You came to see me before seeing Mike?

Screen Shot 2015-06-30 at 8.27.45 PM Who?