“Call the Midwife” recap (4.4): Hoes before Bros


Dr. Turner and Wini visit the brothel, where they tell Midge that she has syphilis. She needs to move into the clinic and be treated, and there may be some health risks for the baby. Midge seems shocked that peroxide douche didn’t prevent the disease, and Wini is upset that none of the sex workers are practicing safe sex.

Barbara sees Frank Robbins laying a rope wreath at a war memorial. We learn that his father and brothers died in the war, and that he made a promise to his dad to carry on the Robbins and Sons business. It’s sympathetic back story, but this guy is still an ignorant douche.

mid6 Heteronormativity is a family tradition

Midge checks into the clinic, which Shelagh adorably calls the Poplar Ritz. We find out that Midge almost had an abortion, but had a change of heart, and now wants to give the baby the love she never had. Wini is upset that none of the sex workers are using sheaths aka condoms, but they all refuse because the clients don’t like them. Wini asks Sgt. Noakes to introduce her to sex workers in the hopes of teaching them safe sex. They hit up Poplar’s red light district, and are unanimously rejected by clients and sex workers. No one is interested in not getting syphilis.

mid7And Jesus said unto his disciples, “No glove no love”

Barbara tells Trixie that the bishop is a tee-totaler, and makes fun of Trixie for drinking so much. It’s light ribbing, but we see Trixie taking it personally. Does Trixie have a problem with booze? Spoiler alert: YUP.

Sister Julienne finds MJ looking at old suffragette photos of herself. MJ remembers being young and vital, but now she feels useless. Julienne assures her she is still a valued member of Nonnatus house, but MJ feels more like a relic of days past.

mid8 We can’t have these nudie judies floating around the convent, sister

Midge receives penicillin injections from Patsy, and they talk about options. Patsy recommends that she move to the young mother’s house that Chummy is running, but Midge doesn’t want to leave the only family she’s ever known. Midge’s friend stops by and tells her that Dora is upset, and she sneaks Midge out of the clinic.

Trixie serves tea to Tom and the bishop, who congratulates Tom on his great work in Poplar. He offers him a parish in a dodgy area of Newcastle, and Trixie balks at raising her family in an impoverished neighborhood. She was hoping for something more rural, but the bishop and Tom make it quite clear that they don’t give a shit about her opinion. Tom chastises Trixie for talking out of turn, and questions whether a life in the church is something she’s suited for. A sad Trixie finds solace in a bottle, and starts drinking the night away.

mid9So glad I filled this tea cup with whiskey

Meanwhile, Midge has returned to the brothel, where a disoriented Dora is dancing for some cruel sailors. She tries to tend to her until her water breaks. Looks like this baby is getting born in the brothel. Wini and Phyllis arrive to assist with the birth, and they call Dr. Turner. A baby girl is born, and she seems to be healthy.

Back at Nonnatus House, Sister MJ is interrupted by a pregnant woman banging on the door. The woman is in desperate need of medical help, but Trixie is passed out. It falls on MJ to tend to her, so she walks the pregnant mum to the clinic through the pouring rain. Shelagh is there to greet them and she and MJ proceed to help deliver the baby. A healthy girl is born, and the mum is so grateful for MJ’s help that she names the girl Monica in her honor. A teary-eyed MJ is honored and I start crying. She feels useful again, you guys!

mid10 Cake for everybody!

Barbara comes home after delivering a baby and is ready to go off shift. When she finds Trixie passed out, she tucks her in and goes off to see to Susan Robbins. It’s three for three on girls, and Susan cries with disappointment. Frank is desperate to know what the child is, but he is sent to call the doctor when Susan has a retained placenta. Susan is taken to the hospital, and Frank finally finds out the baby is a girl. He refuses to look at his newborn daughter, and Barbara has had enough of this misogynistic bullshit and shames him for treating his wife and baby like garbage.

mid11Ur a dick, bro!

Barbara goes home and finds Julienne looking after Trixie. They agree that no one else has to know, and tell the midwives that Trixie was sick. After a long night, the women tally up the births to a record-breaking ten in one night. It’s raining babies in Poplar! Barbara gets congratulated for delivering three on her own.

Shelagh tells Dr. Turner that she miss being a midwife, and feels less useful as his receptionist. They cuddle, and Turner’s son makes fun of them for being mushy.

mid12Congrats Barbara, you get a gift certificate to IHOP!

Trixie feels terrible about sleeping through Babypalooza, and tells Julienne that she feels lost and unsure about her life. We find out that Trixie’s dad was an alcoholic. Julienne urges her to talk to Tom about her drinking, but Trixie has bigger problems with her intended.

Frank still hasn’t seen his daughter, and Susan is devastated. Dr. Turner goes to see Frank at work, and reminds him that his dad would be more concerned for his happiness than his promise. Besides, women can do things now, and maybe his daughter can run the shop. Frank realizes his daughter needs him, so he takes the baby girl in his arms and walks her around the rope shop. Looks like this dick is finally coming around.

mid13 Sorry I’ve been the worst

Tom and Trixie talk about their relationship, and Trixie breaks off the engagement, Tom is devastated, but Trixie returns her ring and walks out. This is sad, but Trixie was never meant to be a clergyman’s wife. Also, Tom is kind of a tool, so good riddance.

mid14 I wonder if this ring will fit Pats

Wini visits the brothel, where Midge is holding her baby. She’s healthy so far, and Midge urges Wini to keep spreading the word about safe sex. Good luck with that, sister.

What did you think of last night’s episode? Hit me up @chelseaprocrast and tell me all about it!

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