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“Gossip Girl” mini-cap: Girls just want to have fun

Blair and her accessories friends plan for her 18th birthday party. Blair’s legal! Serena’s there and wants to help, but she’s horribly pre-occupied with text messages she gets from Aaron directing her to his favorite spots around the city. Even Blair’s distracted, because Eleanor has a new boyfriend and Blair’s dying to meet him and envisions tall, dark and handsome — so of course we know right away that he’s none of the above.

Serena skips out of the party planning and follows a text that sends her to the middle of Times Square, where Aaron meets her. Aaron manages to get a live shot of Serena on the gigantic screen! Wow, he must really be in love to do something so ridiculously grandiose, huh? This gesture is grander than grand, and he and Serena kiss for all of NYC — or at least those stuck in Times Square — to see. Aaron asks if she will be his muse, and after a Jumbotron-size show of emotion, how can a girl resist?

Dan’s sell-out of Chuck, aka Charlie Trout, seems to be paying unusually high dividends. Not only does Dan’s story get him a Yale recommendation from his previous mentor, Noah Shapiro, but his high school writing is so incredibly awesome that New York magazine gives him a shot at an article for their fine publication regarding Charlie Trout’s real-life father. They want an exposé of Bart Bass. Dan agrees to do it, because apparently self-righteous only gets you to community college but ruthless gets you Ivy League recommendations.

Finally, Blair meets her mother’s new boyfriend, Cyrus Rose (yeah, Aaron’s father), and is grossly disappointed in his looks, his height and what seems to be his annoying personality. She tries to be mature about it until she learns that Cyrus and her mother are skipping her birthday party and heading to a Cyndi Lauper concert. Blair decides to search for skeletons in Cyrus’ closet to end the relationship once and for all. Over dinner with Cyrus, he tells Blair some long, sad story about a lost love when he was in Vietnam.

Serena’s happy to be Aaron’s muse, and enjoys her time with him. He photographs her all day and makes some cool visual-art piece with the pictures. Right when Serena gets all cozy, a new model reports for her session with Aaron. Serena ultimately realizes that Aaron collects muses the way some people collect stamps. Later Aaron tells Serena that he’s not sure how things are done in high school, but yes, he does date other women. (Um, Aaron? Yeah, well, you don’t Jumbotron a high-schooler and then act surprised when she thinks she might be that special someone to you. Dork.)

Dan approaches Bart Bass under the guise of being interested in construction, and Bart allows Dan to shadow him for a few days. Bart must feel sorry that Dan has a washed-up one-hit-wonder as a father. Of course, Chuck smells a rat. It could either be Dan’s aftershave or his writing voice.

Dan gets inside info from a source that Bart made his fortune by setting a building on fire and collecting the insurance on it. When Dan approaches Bart with the info, Bart says something about feeling bad all these years that a guy died in the fire! (What is it with Upper East Siders harboring secrets of killing people?) Bart tries to bribe Dan, but Chuck rushes in and tells his father that Dan’s a writer and to zip his mouth. Chuck then begs Dan not to write the story because it will ruin lives and families.

Dan soul-searches and sends something to Bart. It’s the story Dan wrote about Chuck. Bart reads it and then goes and apologizes to Chuck for being Daddy Dearest all these years. Dan Humphrey: saving the world one father and son at a time.

Eleanor gets annoyed with Blair and tells her to butt out regarding her relationship with Cyrus. So Blair tells Eleanor that he’s no different than Eleanor’s first husband, because Cyrus cheated on his wife with the Vietnamese woman. When Cyrus shows up to Blair’s party, Eleanor confronts him and kicks him out.

Minutes later, Cyndi Lauper comes to Blair’s party — Cyrus bought out all the tickets and asked for a private concert because he didn’t want Eleanor to miss her daughter’s birthday party. Blair rushes after Cyrus to apologize, and then Blair realizes that Cyrus outwitted her, which gives him cool points (for now).

Aaron shows up at Serena’s the next day for a date that was never confirmed. Serena decides that she likes Aaron and that she’s going to go for it! I’m not sure what the “it” is, but whatever it is she left the house wearing her nightie and a jacket — to show her devil-may-care attitude, I guess.

Meanwhile, Jenny’s crashing at Agnes’, and after the success of the guerilla fashion show the two teens have lofty dreams of being fashion’s Bonnie and Clyde. But the way they behave at a professional meeting with a potential business manager, they look more like Abbot and Costello.

Agnes sees the new clothing line as a partnership, since she has the industry connections and contacts, she had the idea for the guerilla fashion show, and she gave Jenny the inspiration to try to make it on her own. But fashion is a designer-driven industry, and not only are cute/hot models a dime a dozen, but if the models have no clothes to wear while they’re working then they’re probably not making money in fashion but in the adult-entertainment industry. So Jenny and Agnes really aren’t all that equal in this venture.

After Agnes stands Jenny up and seems to not be taking the hunt for representation as seriously as Jenny, Jenny contacts the guy they had met with already and tries to work a deal on her own. The guy is all for it, but since Jenny is under 18 she has to have parental consent.

Agnes learns that Jenny went behind her back to cut a deal with the business manager. When Jenny shows up at Agnes’, she tosses all of Jenny’s dresses in a trash can and lights them on fire.

Jenny returns home to Rufus to see if he’ll sign the contract allowing her to move forward with her line, but Rufus doesn’t want to reward her for all her underhanded tomfoolery. Jenny goes back to the manager and asks what her next step could be, and he tells her she would have to become an emancipated minor. She seems willing.

So, where is the storyline going with Jenny? And what exactly does Serena see in Aaron? Is he worth sharing? And now that Bart is in the running for Dad of the Year, something bad has to happen to him, right?

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