“South of Nowhere” Recap: Episode 3.11 “A Very Inconvenient Truth”

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He got game — Over at Chelsea’s

studio, Glen is looking over her winning sketch for Clay’s memorial and gushing

all over, as he should.  She is still the

only person in the LA metro area who is nice to Glen or in any way encouraging

of his well-meaning antics.  In fact, she

credits him with helping her win the contest.

But he gets all “aw shucks” about it and apologizes in advance for

“bailing” on her when she needs him most.

What he really means is, “I don’t want to go camping with my

father.”  Still, she tries to tell him

how awesome it will be to go fishing in the Sierras with his annoying dad. She

reminds him that “they” always used to go, but he corrects her. Clay and Arthur used to go on those

outdoor adventures, while Glen would sit in the tent and play Tetris. Change the game to electronic Yahtzee,

and I will gladly meet you in the mosquito netting, my friend.

She chides him for not being “positive,” adding “father-son

bonding is supposed to be a good thing.” She promises him that he will have a

great time. Neither Glen nor I believe her.

Three’s company — Later at Chez Carlin, Glen is underfoot in

the garage as Arthur tries to get all of their camping supplies organized.  He’s wearing a flannel shirt and a ball cap,

which is, I think, supposed to make him look rugged and outdoors-y.  Instead, he looks like the lost member of the

Indigo Girls (Amy Ray’s not-as-butch younger brother). Paula rolls her eyes as

Arthur tells Glen for the millionth time where to find the propane accessories. Whether

she’s being an evil homophobe or a reformed PFLAG-er, Paula is always good for

an eye-roll.

Ashley and Spencer roll up, immediately followed by Aiden on

his crotch-rocket.  Arthur barely bats an

eye when his daughter arrives, but when he hears the heavenly putters of

Aiden’s arrival he begins shrieking and clapping like a little girl, “Woohoo!

Ladies and gentlemen,  Mr. Robbie

Knievel!”  He glares at the rest of the

family until they awkwardly join him in the applause.

Arthur tells Aiden that they’re going fly fishing in the

Sierras, opening the door for an Aiden invasion.

Aiden: (coyly) My uncle fishes off his boat in Catalina, but

I never really learned how to cast a line.

Arthur:
Wanna come? I’ll have you pitching like a pro in two

hours!

Aiden:
Really?

Arthur:
Satisfaction guaranteed or your money back!

Eww.

Aiden: It’s tempting…I don’t want to intrude or anything.

Arthur:
Intrude? Are you kidding me? I’ve got plenty of

room, I’ve got extra gear, and inside this ice chest I’ve got prime fillets

that have been marinating in ponzu

sauce
for 36 hours strike me dead.

Aiden:
I’m in, okay, I’m in.

Arthur:
(to Glen): You don’t mind, do you?

Glen:
(dejected) As long as I get shotgun, it’s all good

with me.

Arthur:
Great. Next stop, Kern river! Let’s go!

Aiden has perfectly timed his arrival to break-up the little

lovefest between Arthur and Glen. He used to do the same thing to Ashley and

Spencer, so I’m glad he has a new target focus.

Who can it be now? — At the Carlin abode, Spencer is the in

fridge gathering supplies so she can whip up something special for Ashley.  Ashley sashays in wearing a skimpy little

robe and kisses Spencer on the shoulder.

Spencer: This is gonna be good.

Ashley:
This is

going to be out of this world.

Uhh, are you two talking about the same thing?

Spencer: I meant the food. Look at you! You are wearing my

robe.

Ashley: I know. I always wanted to be naked in the Carlin

home…without being slapped and pulled out by my hair!

She means by Paula,

you dirty little minxes!

Per the norm, just when things could potentially get

interesting between these two, there’s a knock at the door.

Ugh. It’s Jonica.

Spencer answers the door and the little skeezer asks, “Remember me?”

Spencer smiles and says, “Of course. Come in!”

Spencer went to the Arthur Carlin School of Cluelessness.

Jonica: So Lily was telling me that you’re really into

documentaries, so I thought I’d bring over my personal favorites, if it’s not

weird of me stopping by like this

Ashley: Hi.

Jonica:
Oh, you totally have company. I should be going.

Spencer:
Oh no, it’s fine. Ashley, this is Jonica. Jonica is

actually a friend of Lily’s.

Ashley:
Jonica? That’s…different.

Jonica:
Yeah, sort of a typo, but it stuck.  I’m thinking of changing my name to Fred.

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