“South of Nowhere” Recap: Episode 3.10 “Spencer’s 18th Birthday”


Sing a song

In New York, Ashley is gearing up for the big performance and

Kyla is chanting “I can’t do this.” Not a good sign. Remember

when I told you I sensed an episode of acid reflux coming on?

It’s happening. Ashley starts to catch on that there might be

something awry just as the stage manager starts to count them in for

their performance.

The song begins and it’s

immediately a train wreck. Kyla is swaying off-tempo, and Ashley is

on key but frozen in place with a petrified look on her face.

Then Kyla appears to forget

the words to the song but her part keeps playing and the whole thing

looks like Godzilla: The Musical!

(Kyla still sounds off-key to me. If you lip sync, shouldn’t the track

at least be on-key?)

Back a Chez Carlin everyone

watching gasps in horror. Glen predicts, “Ashley is going to freak!”

Diving into the wreckage

Ashley is just getting back into her apartment when Spencer

calls. She asks if Ash is ok, and she tells her,

“Well, my music career is

completely over. But other than that, I’m great.” Spencer

offers to come cheer her up (bring your trench coat!), but Ashley wants

to get some rest first.

Spencer hangs up with Ash only

to be faced with her next problem, The Seed. She’s packed up her family

values and is ready to go back home.


Grandma, you don’t have to go.


: Oh, I think it would be best.


Can you even look at me?

The Seed

I never loved your grandfather. When I married him, I thought I could.

But I never did. Yet I stayed married to him until the day he passed




The Seed

Because it was the right thing to do.


But doesn’t your heart tell you what’s right?

The Seed

If it were only that simple.


Maybe it is.

The Seed

I should get going


Grandma, no matter what, you are always in my heart.

It’s a nice sentiment, but

it doesn’t keep The Seed from speeding away in her gilded cab from

the scene of the big gay crime.

Next week on

South of Nowhere
Kyla plays Meet the Press while Ashley

meets her competition.


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