Sing a song
—In New York, Ashley is gearing up for the big performance and
Kyla is chanting “I can’t do this.” Not a good sign. Remember
when I told you I sensed an episode of acid reflux coming on?
It’s happening. Ashley starts to catch on that there might be
something awry just as the stage manager starts to count them in for
The song begins and it’s
immediately a train wreck. Kyla is swaying off-tempo, and Ashley is
on key but frozen in place with a petrified look on her face.
Then Kyla appears to forget
the words to the song but her part keeps playing and the whole thing
looks like Godzilla: The Musical!
(Kyla still sounds off-key to me. If you lip sync, shouldn’t the track
at least be on-key?)
Back a Chez Carlin everyone
watching gasps in horror. Glen predicts, “Ashley is going to freak!”
Diving into the wreckage
—Ashley is just getting back into her apartment when Spencer
calls. She asks if Ash is ok, and she tells her,
“Well, my music career is
completely over. But other than that, I’m great.” Spencer
offers to come cheer her up (bring your trench coat!), but Ashley wants
to get some rest first.
Spencer hangs up with Ash only
to be faced with her next problem, The Seed. She’s packed up her family
values and is ready to go back home.
Grandma, you don’t have to go.
Seed: Oh, I think it would be best.
Can you even look at me?
I never loved your grandfather. When I married him, I thought I could.
But I never did. Yet I stayed married to him until the day he passed
Because it was the right thing to do.
But doesn’t your heart tell you what’s right?
If it were only that simple.
Maybe it is.
I should get going
Grandma, no matter what, you are always in my heart.
It’s a nice sentiment, but
it doesn’t keep The Seed from speeding away in her gilded cab from
the scene of the big gay crime.
Next week on
South of Nowhere — Kyla plays Meet the Press while Ashley
meets her competition.