“South of Nowhere” Recap: Episode 3.10 “Spencer’s 18th Birthday”

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Paula’s civic pride is

interrupted by her obsession with the “clutter” in Spencer’s room.

She nervously begins tidying up, which Spencer deduces can mean only

one thing: Paula’s mother is coming for a visit! Paula attempts a

smile, but she’s practically wringing her surgically-trained hands

right off of her body.

Grandmama must be a scary piece

of work to reduce Mother Superior to a big bag of nerves.

The glamorous life

Back at Chez Davies, Spencer watches as Ashley packs for her

trip.

Ashley:

Your grandma does know that you’re gay, right?

Spencer:


Well…do you ever want people to know without actually having to tell

them?

Ashley:


Yeah, all the time.

Their “coming out to grandma” strategery is interrupted by Jake’s overly-dramatic

tirade about how the “girls” can’t ride in coach.

Spencer spies the nifty little

video camera that Ashley once used to capture everyone’s “first

time” confessionals for her “documentary” (yeah, I need to remember

that one). She asks if she can borrow it and I immediately wonder what’s

kind of embarrassing footage is going to “accidentally” get recorded

and made viral.

The old theater rule about

having guns in a scene (don’t do it unless you’re gonna use ‘em)

now holds true for video cameras. Is video the new weaponry?

Of course, Ashley agrees, then

remembers to present Spencer with her next gift. She pulls out a big,

jangly key ring and Spencer’s eyes widen. “You’re giving me your

car?” Uh, no. The keys to Ashley’s Porsche are only for the weekend.

That’s just long enough to give Spencer a taste of the good life and

keep her coming back for more.

Jake hustles everyone out of

the apartment, including Kyla, who has barely stumbled out of her room.

She complains that she’s “sick” and he tells her she’s not.

Clearly, they’re still in that charming honeymoon stage of their relationship.

I feel like I’ve seen this dynamic somewhere before. I hope it turns out better

for Kyla!

Who’s that girl

Spencer is lugging her grandma’s suitcase through the airport

parking lot and making harmless small talk. Grandma (played by guest

star Patty McCormack) tells Spencer that she sat next to a “hippie

type” jewelry-making lady on the plane and bought a necklace (engraved

with the word “Always”) from her for Spencer.

Just as she’s presenting

it, she gets a glimpse of their ride. Her invisible judgment tentacles

spring into the air and begin twitching, “Did your mother buy you

this car?” (i.e. “Paula had better be saving up for my retirement

home fund!”)

Spencer explains that the car

belongs to a “really good friend” who’s in New York. The

tentacles fly up again and Grandma whispers, “A boyfriend?” Wrong

again, grandma. Spencer croaks, “Uh no, not a boyfriend.” Grandma

is relieved. “That’s my good girl. You’re too young. Focus on

school. Spend time with your girlfriends.” Well, if you insist!

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