The L Word Recaps: Episode 1.2 “Let’s Do It”

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The country club — Dana’s agent surprises her in the locker room. He tells her that a Subaru rep will be there the next day to watch her train. Dana lies down on the bench, giddy and overwhelmed. The sous chef walks in to change her messy jacket; she sees Dana on the bench and asks her if she’s okay.

Dana: "Um, I’m fine! I’m fine. That was my agent. He just told me Subaru might use me for an ad campaign. So they’re gonna watch me train tomorrow, which is so cool."

Lara: "That’s so exciting!"

Dana: "Yeah, it is. It is, kinda. I mean, you know: I can’t mess up."

Lara: "I’m sure you won’t. Um… you can turn around now. My jacket’s back on. My job is so messy. I have to change like three times a day."

Dana: "Yeah? You always look nice when I see you. I mean, I mean, you never look dirty. When I see you… I’ve gotta go. I, I have to go."

Lara: "Listen, why don’t you come by later? I’ll send something down for you."

Dana: "Okay. Yeah."

Lara: "Great."

Dana: "Thank you."

Dana is so flustered throughout the whole thing. She even leaves her bag behind and has to go back for it. They’re both so adorable: I think my vagina is spontaneously rejuvenating itself.

The Planet — Alice has been stood up. Where is that Gabby? I’m gonna deck her. Oh, there she is: she says she’s sorry, and Alice says, "Yeah, yeah, you really are." Ha ha! Alice says she has to go because her friends are waiting. Gabby asks her whether she has to do everything her friends tell her to do. Shut up! I used to like you, Guinevere, but now I’m not so sure. Alice goes with her friends, but she mouths "call me" to Gabby as they go. Tsk tsk.

The country club — How many lesbians can you fit into a Mini Cooper? Four, apparently, and they don’t look a bit rumpled. This is a hilarious scene: Bette, Tina, Alice, and Shane infiltrate the country club to spy on the sous-chef. The music is great, the editing is great, and the Charlie’s-Angels-meets-Inspector-Gadget feel of the whole thing is fabulous.

Shane sits with Dana and identifies the target; she passes the dossier to her fellow agents via cell phone. It’s impossible to do this scene justice in print: it’s zippy and clever and whee! Every time I think it’s going to cross the line into stupid, somebody does something funny. They check out Lara’s shoes — "kitchen shoes, neutral" — and then the earrings — "hoops, hard to read" — and then when they notice that Lara’s looking back at them, Bette and Tina start smooching. And it’s great smooching! Some other guests get annoyed, but Lara doesn’t react much either way. They suddenly abort the mission, and Dana watches them go, with a hilarious mix of worry and confusion on her face. Erin Daniels, you are definitely the comedic genius of the group.

The spies regroup in the bathroom. There’s no clear answer; Bette notes that Lara "got some good lezzie points for her walk and for the way she wields that chopping knife." The bottom line is that she’s got "nine in the lez column" and "only seven in the straight," but the margin of error is plus or minus five percentage points. Bwah ha ha! They decide to send in the secret weapon.

Shane sneaks up to the — hmm, what do you call that? The chef’s counter or service counter or something? I dunno from country clubs. Anyway, she starts hitting on Lara. I already love Lara, so I didn’t need much more, but the fact that she’s thoroughly unimpressed by Shane — well, that gives her major points in my book.

The secret agents tell Dana that it doesn’t look good. Well, maybe Lara could be "a different kind of lesbian." Don’t be silly — we’re all exactly like you five! That’s why we love this show: because it’s like looking into a mirror. I can’t even count the number of times I’ve played spy games at the local country club in order to catch a friend a date. Speaking of catching someone, Lacey the Stalker drives by the country club as our fearless heroines walk to their car. Shane gets nervous — I thought she was too cool for that — and I laugh.

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