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“The L Word” Recaps: Episode 5.6 “Lights! Camera! Action!”

THIS WEEK’S L WORD VOCABULARY:

Détente: Hard to come by when you share a border with SheBar. Love: According to Alice, it doesn’t always matter. Tongue-clicking and winking: Ways to get the ladies. Comparing: What’s never fair in love or war.
THIS WEEK’S GUESTBIANS: Malaya Rivera Drew sheds her skin; Jane Lynch makes a deal; Clementine Ford gawps at the natives; Alicia Leigh Willis and Elizabeth Keener take their gloves off; Kate French questions authority; Wendy Glenn and Angela Gots play dumb; Cybill Shepherd gets wild; Wallace Shawn laughs his trademark laugh.

No less icky the second time around – Oh, boy: a Lez Girls rehearsal. Nina is peeing on an ovulation test stick.

Gretchen/Nina: You’re not gonna shoot the pee stream, are ya? Jenny: I might. So just keep on going.
Ack! She might shoot it?! I guess Carmen taught Jenny to appreciate pee streams. And clearly Jenny wants to make Lez Girls the darling of the festival circuit. I can see the blurb now, peppered with Sundance-y words like “edgy,” “carnal” and “no-holds-barred.”

Bev enters the scene, expressing her excitement about the ovulation and giving Nina a little kiss.

Bella/Bev: [to Jenny] I’m fine with all that. But then it says that I “F” her against the sink. I just … I’m not really sure what that means. Jenny: Really?
Jenny tries to show Bella just how that works.
Jenny: You’re gonna take her, and you’re gonna kiss her, with tongue … and then I want you to reach down, and then I want you to finger-f— her, and give her the best f—ing orgasm ever.
And then Jenny does a finger-pointing, tongue-clicking thing that’s almost worthy of Joyce Wischnia. Ha ha!

Bella/Bev: Oh, you mean with my hand. Jenny: Yeah. Unless you have some other apparati that I don’t know about.
Apparati. You know, the plural of apparatus. Kinda like bogi is the plural of bogus.

So Bella tries to do as she’s told, but Jenny’s not impressed.

Jenny: It might be nice if you look like you’re actually giving her pleasure, rather than moving furniture.
Jenny’s shrug is surpassed in hilarity only by Adele’s pursed lips in the background. Bella keeps trying, but Jenny says it looks more like she’s trying to sew up a hole in Gretchen’s jeans.
Bella: [whispering] I don’t really know what I’m supposed to be doing. Gretchen: [conspiratorial] Neither do I.
Isn’t that precious? Isn’t it adorable when straight actresses have no clue how to play gay? Because, gosh, they’ve just never imagined it! They wouldn’t know the first thing about kissing a woman or what two women get up to together!
Jenny: [waving her hand] Step away. Move away from her.
Jenny tells Adele to schedule some workshop time for all the actresses who are clueless on this point.
Jenny: You guys are gonna learn how to f—.
Well, at least something good will come of all this. Uh, so to speak.

Hey, wait a minute: How would Jenny even know anything about Bette and Tina’s activities – finger-f—ing or otherwise – while Tina was trying to get pregnant? She wasn’t in that scene in Season 1. If you needed proof that Jenny is Ilene Chaiken, I think you just got it.

A rude awakening – Shane is at SheBar, trying to order some humble pie. But Dawn Denbo and her lover Cindi aren’t serving anything but attitude.

Shane: I came here to apologize. I didn’t meant any disrespect. Not towards you, or to your relationship. I apologize. And I’m sorry for the way I treated you when you came into my house. I was just a little, uh … I wasn’t me that night. So I’d like to make peace. And if there’s anything I can do to even the playing field …
As it happens, there is. Dawn Denbo wants Jenny to use SheBar as a location for Lez Girls. Shane reluctantly agrees to ask her “best friend and roommate.” (I thought Alice was Shane’s best friend?)
Dawn: You know, you make that happen, we might be talking détente.
Am I the only one who wants to hear, “Hi, I’m Dawn Denbo, and this is my lover Cindi, and this is our daughter, Détente”?

Dawn has one more stipulation.

Dawn: It has to be called SheBar in the movie. Not the Pluto Cafe or whatever the stupid thing was called that’s supposed to be The Planet. Shane: What? Dawn: SheBar is such a better location. I can’t believe they were going to pay $50,000 a day for that wannabe Peach Pit of a s—hole. Shane: You’re too much. I can’t do it. Dawn: What? What can’t you do, Shane? Other than make my girlfriend come?
Whoa! The Peach Pit! And uh, the other comment – Dawn fights dirty, eh? And she just gets meaner when Shane says she can’t betray her friend Kit like that. They snarl at each other some more, and then Shane gives up and leaves. As she goes, Cindi whispers, “Call me.”

Yeah, the neighborhood is definitely livelier with these two wingnuts around. And Elizabeth Keener is rocking this role. I think she might be almost as badass as Pam Grier.

Tasha doesn’t live here anymore – Alice is packing Tasha’s things into a small suitcase. She takes the suitcase to the door, where Tasha is waiting to trade it for a key.

Alice: Did you want to come in and see if I forgot anything? Tasha: I trust you. Alice: That’s bull—-. You don’t trust me.
Tasha steps forward and stands toe-to-toe and eye-to-eye with Alice, who seems to get a bit flustered by the nearness of her soldier girl.
Tasha: I trust you. We’re just not good for each other. Alice: I’m really sorry that I f—ed your life up. Tasha: I was gay long before I ever met you.
For a moment, it seems like they’re going to kiss, but then Tasha steps back. They chat briefly about Tasha’s case and Alice’s opportunity to be on a talk show called The Look. She would be replacing someone name Kelly Corrigan. (Gee, whatever and whoever could that be a reference to? I just can’t think of a former talk show host with an Irish surname and a connection to someone named Kelly, or a talk show with a vision-related title. I’m drawing a blank.)
Alice: I don’t know if I’m gonna do it, though. If I want to be, you know, the replacement dyke. Tasha: Oh, come on. Alice: No, you know, ’cause they want me to be out and flamboyant and audacious, and … you know, it’s on national television. I don’t know if I want to be gay for the whole world.
Uh. Didn’t you just gay it up on national TV in the last episode? I guess that was cable news, not network daytime, but still. You’re a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma, Pieszecki.
Tasha: This is why we’re not good for each other. Why would you think twice about something like this? It’s like a dream come true for you. Alice: You don’t know what I dream of.
Ouch. They both know that’s not the truth. It’s just what it has come to.
Tasha: You’re right. I’m gonna go.
And she does. And it’s sad. But not quite sad enough, somehow; I guess because it seemed inevitable.

Parts of that almost felt like a scene from a lesbian pulp novel. They totally should have envisioned it that way, like they did when Shane and Paige were talking about moving in together. Imagine the cover: Tasha in a uniform and Alice in a peignoir, with the title The Devil’s Duty and the teaser, “She served her country … one woman at a time!”

And if I were the music director, I’d have cued up “One Less Bell to Answer” as Alice closes the door. “All I do is cry!”

Sing it, sing it – Instead, we hear Joan Armatrading’s “Love and Affection” as the scene changes to Bette’s kitchen. The song makes no sense for Alice and Tasha, and is a little too obvious for Bette and Tina. But I do like it – especially in the film Eulogy, when Debra Winger plays it on the piano to express her affection for Glenne Headly’s character. Yum.

As Joan sings, “I am not in love, but I’m open to persuasion,” Tina shuffles into the doorway and asks if she can come in. Who wouldn’t welcome that black tank top? Bette is surprised to see Tina. She explains that Kit and Angie aren’t going to be back from Disneyland for a couple of hours.

Tina: I came early. I hope you don’t mind.
That is so totally fine with Bette.

Bette is cooking (uh, I mean, cooking food, and also otherwise), so Tina asks whether she’s having a dinner party. Bette chuckles, as if to say, “No – for a change.” She just likes to cook for Angie sometimes because it makes her feel more like they’re a family.

Tina inches closer and closer and gets very interested in the food and the fragrance and whether Jodi taught Bette to cook. I think maybe you did, Tina.

Bette: I’ll have to cook for you sometime.
Yeah! How ’bout now?

But I’m being too glib; there’s a serious overtone here too. Tina definitely takes the talk of “family” seriously, and seems to be at war with herself over whether to give in to her impulses or hold back in the interest of boundaries. I think everyone’s going to win this battle.

Tina: [from behind Bette, with a hint of pleading] Bette …
Bette freezes. She is equal parts fear and hope.

Tina: Turn around.
They look at each other, confirming, hesitating.
Tina: Look, I know that you don’t want to hurt Jodi … Bette: No, I don’t.
And then Tina closes the distance between them and they kiss, confirming, no longer hesitating. These two are soooo sexy together. They still have more chemistry than any other couple on the show.

But I do wish Bette weren’t cheating on someone again. And I do wish they had turned off the stove burners before pulling each other to the bedroom. Safety first, ladies!

Bette stops for a moment to ask, “What are we doing?” But Tina shushes her. Tina does more than shush her, actually; she essentially tops her, even though Bette initially defaults to their old patterns. Tina even tries to talk dirty, but she just recycles that speculum-worthy “spread ’em” line from her date with Brenda. Luckily, Bette doesn’t seem to mind.

Tina: You’re so wet. I just want to f— you.
I think I forgot to turn off my burners, too! Pardon me while I cool off a bit.

A tirade – Jenny. What are your boots about? Are you going clam digging? But no; she’s just in her usual weirdo-diva mode. Apparently she’s scouting locations in Canada, but it’s not going very well.

Jenny: [on the phone, leaving a message for Tina] It’s not gonna work. All right? Vancouver doesn’t pass as L.A. And I am not gonna shoot here in this waterlogged, provincial little city.
Mama Chaiken, I think you’ve just passed Meta Town and gone right on into Masturbatory City.

Jenny throws her phone away in disgust. It lands in some bushes, and Adele trots off to fetch it. Rarely do we get to see such a creature in its natural habitat. Adele also gives Jenny some Nicorette and stands by for her next assignment. But hey, why wait when you can act? She interrupts Jenny’s rant and says William the money guy just texted her back. He wants to shoot in L.A. – the financing is in place and everything.

Jenny: When did I text him? I don’t remember doing that. I feel like I’m going crazy.
Oh! That last line is like a present you never knew you always wanted. Delightful.

Adele, who is actually pretty adorkable in her hat, confesses that she took the liberty of texting William because she saw how unhappy Jenny was. Jenny doesn’t even really react to Adele’s audacity, probably because it’s right in line with her inner compass of Jenny First.

Jenny: I think that we need to celebrate.
She grabs Adele’s hat right off her head and throws it over to those accessory-attracting bushes. Adele immediately goes into fetch mode again (I love it!), but Jenny stops her. It’s time to go shopping.
Jenny: We’re gonna transform my lovely assistant.
Just don’t saw her in half, OK?

Dr. Kroll’s office of obligations – Phyllis is asking Joyce for advice about her divorce. But Joyce takes it to the next level. She offers a countersuit and her services – the legal ones, not the lady-loving ones. Not that her lawyerly skills don’t warrant a wink.

Joyce: Phyllis, you hired me to represent you, and then you fired me so we could make sweet love. And then you broke my heart. So, the way I see it, you’re down a lawyer; I’m down a job.
Phyllis isn’t sure about this. I am: Hire her!
Joyce: Phyllis, I’m the best in the business. I win cases. It’s what I do. And I got a bum deal here. So I’m not gonna walk away from a sweet piece of business just because we didn’t work out as lovers. In fact, I think you kinda owe me this one.
A “sweet piece of business”?! I have to start incorporating that into my everyday speech. Not to mention tongue-clicking – that’s two instances in one episode, from Jenny to Joyce. Phyllis should put the tongue-click in her notebook of lesbian lingo.

Joyce, is your scene over already? I wish I could hire you, too. You would have made sure guestbian was mine, all mine. Muahahahaha.

Mallrats – Uh. We’re in a mall. Jenny and Adele are ascending the escalator to the tune of “Pull Shapes” by the Pipettes. You thought it was the Spice Girls, didn’t you? Maybe that was just me. Adele thinks the clothes are way too pricey, but Jenny drags her over to the Chanel. It’s all coming out of the wardrobe budget anyway. They shop till my eyelids drop.

Jenny: We should get you some jeans now, because, um, Adele, the appliqué on the back of your jeans was declared an abomination by the Geneva Convention.
Arrrgh! For the love of all that is legally binding, there is no “Geneva Convention” – no gang of rumpled businesspeople who went to Switzerland for a weekend of team-building! There are several Geneva Conventions, plural, and they are international treaties, not gaggles of balding capitalists waiting to hit the hotel bar after the last PowerPoint presentation.

Sorry. I feel better. Adele and Jenny shop and wave to each other from escalators and buy a necklace for Niki (that was Adele’s idea, of course). Jenny worries about keeping Niki a secret.

Adele: I’ll make sure that nobody has the slightest inkling.
Finally, surprise, surprise: What was once mousy is now magnificent. But Jenny won’t let anyone touch Adele’s hair. Only Shane can have that honor.

Sheesh, was that scene 19 hours long or what? And was it supposed to be some sort of extended movie reference or something? I’m no expert on the makeover/shopping genre. But at least Jenny apparently traded in her boots at some point.

Emotional whiplash – After that giddy bubblegum stuff, we see Alice on her bed, crying. The camera moves slowly across the bed, and I half expect to see Ghost Dana perched on a pillow. I don’t know whether that would have been good or bad. I could use a little pick-me-up, frankly.

We are family – Tina and Angelica are having breakfast at Tina’s house. (Nice digs, by the way.) Tina suggests that they call Mama B to see if she wants to meet them at The Planet. Angie whispers “Mama B” so many times and so cutely, I think I’m going to faint from gasping at the darlingness. Alas, it’s not to be: Bette is having breakfast with Jodi. Funny how girlfriends can get in the way of affairs. But actually, Jodi wouldn’t have interfered at all. She’s in the mood to go out and is surprised Bette doesn’t want to join Mama T and Angie.

Bette: I would really just like to sit in my garden and read the newspaper.
Ahh. The perfect Sunday morning. But this one isn’t, at least not for Jodi.
Bette: But if you want to go to The Planet and do another podcast …
Passive-aggressive much? That’s not fair, and Jodi knows it, and so does Bette – and we know what it’s really about.
Jodi: I said I was just joking. And I said I was sorry, too. Are you gonna go on punishing me forever?
Bette apologizes and says she really just needs some “Sunday alone time” so she can prepare for the meeting with the board about the traumatic soapstone-gun performance art. (Is there such a thing as non-traumatic soapstone-gun performance art?)
Jodi: What are you going to tell them? Bette: I really don’t know. Jodi: [signing] Tell them your judgment was clouded because Professor Lerner is an incredibly hot f—.
Bette laughs nervously, which probably isn’t the reaction Jodi was hoping for. But she winks anyway. Gosh: First we had the tongue-clicks from Jenny and Joyce, and now the winks from Jodi and Joyce. Everyone whose name starts with J has been taking courses at the Wischnia Institute for Advanced Progressive Sustainable Global Policy Reform and Macking Innovation.

The Planet – Since Bette didn’t deign to dine with her and Angie, Tina is breakfasting with Shane and Alice. Could Angie be more adorable? (Looks like she has also found that sippy cup Mama B was shrieking for at the beginning of Season 4.)

Shane asks whether they’re all going to Phyllis’ party tonight. Tina asks whether Bette’s going to be there.

Alice: I thought you guys were getting along lately. Tina: Yeah, yeah. It’s not a problem.
In fact, it’s what you might call a good problem to have.
Tina: Is Tasha coming? Alice: [strident] It’s over, Tina!
Some people are so touchy!
Tina: Come on, this is crazy. You two are so in love. Alice: It doesn’t always matter.
Before Tina can continue to torture Alice, Tina’s phone rings. Her ringtone is beyond sweet: It’s Angelica saying, “You have a phone call” in a singsongy way.

Guess who’s on the phone? Bette. It seems she didn’t need alone time after all. Tina explains that she’s no longer wanting for company.

Bette: Well … I really wanna see you, Tina. Tina: Well, I can’t right now.
Did Tina just refuse to ask “how high?” when Bette said “jump”? Maybe things really are evolving, at least on one side of the equation.

The conversation and the breakfast – not to mention my rodent-phobic girlfriend’s peace of mind – are suddenly derailed by the sight of some rats scurrying through the cafe. Angelica exclaims, “Puppies!” Shane hops right up onto a chair. She knows when to fold those butch cards.

Next thing you know, Kit is trying to convince a health department inspector that she doesn’t have rats. Well, maybe not before those pesky party-throwing neighbors moved in – you know what they say about new construction scaring up the vermin.

The inspector shuts down The Planet until further notice.

Kit: How did this f—ing happen? Shane: I have a theory.
And her theory is enough to send Kit into full Pam Grier mode. Kit, I might have to start calling you Kate!

Phyllis’ Shake Shack – It’s the party of the year at Phyllis’ house. She and her late-in-life lesbian pals are shimmying to oldies-but-goodies like “Leader of the Pack.”

Tina sees Bette and walks right over to her. Bette is clearly trying to protect herself from gamma rays. Or maybe she’s preparing for a joust. Tina asks where Jodi is.

Bette: She didn’t want to do a work thing, and Phyllis is work for us. Tina: Right. Bette: Tina? Do you want to get out of here?
OK, I’ll admit it. I swooned a little. So did Tina. Bette turns without a word, and Tina follows.

They left just in time, because things are getting crazy. Phyllis and her friends are suddenly disrobing and hooting and hollering and dancing on the diving board. And they’re all wearing similar undergarments.

Alice: [to Shane] You gonna dance in your black bra?
Now that’s our sassy Alice!

Just as Phyllis is about to get even looser, someone interesting arrives at the party. Shane asks Alice who she is.

Shane: She’s cute. New arrival: Mother!
Yes, it’s Phyllis’ daughter. And it’s also Cybill Shepherd’s real-life daughter, because the meta-er, the merrier.

Equally shocking – Bette and Tina have tea at Tina’s house. They chat about Lez Girls and Director Schecter. And then they really talk.

Bette: I don’t know what to do.

Tina: You’re in love with Jodi, right? Bette: I adore her. And I respect and admire her. But … Tina: [barely daring to breathe] But what?

Bette: [softly] It doesn’t really compare.
They make love to the haunting, seductive strains of Feist’s “Honey Honey.” Maybe Feist didn’t win a Grammy, but I think we can crown her Sexiest New Artist after this. My poor heart can’t take much more of this hotness. This sex scene recalls the incredible scene of the pilot episode, and reminds us that these two just might be made for each other.

The cold light of day – It’s 4:03 a.m. Bette reluctantly unwraps herself from Tina’s embrace. With her back turned to Tina, she silently mouths the words “I love you.” But Tina’s not so silent.

Tina: Jodi would be so devastated. Bette: She can’t find out. Tina: Well, I’m certainly not gonna tell her. Bette: I’m sorry, I just … I just need more time. That’s all. Tina: I’m not pushing you. I don’t even know what I want.
They agree – to the point of saying it about five times in five different ways – that they need to figure out what they want and what’s right for them. Individually. Right. Yes. Starting with one more kiss.

The Lez Girls set – Jenny and Adele have arrived for the first day of shooting.

Jenny: Wow, Adele, can you believe this? All of this because of a few little words that I put on a page.
False modesty does not become you, Jenny.

Jenny is generally clueless – not knowing, for example, that a “room” is a “trailer” – but Adele somehow knows everything about showbiz. Curiouser and curiouser.

A crew member stops them and asks if they’re looking for extras holding. Oops. You’re fired! Keeping up appearances – Jodi and Bette are meeting with Chancellor Kroll. They think they’re there to discuss the traumatic art project. But Phyllis wants them to help her smooth things over with her daughter, who now thinks her mother is a “promiscuous, debauched lesbian.”

Phyllis: I need you to help me convince Molly that lesbians can be respectable and upstanding and stable.
Bette, are you willing to make such a statement today? Phyllis thinks Molly will get the message if she just spends some time with Bette and Jodi. And then the conversation turns to the shoot-himself-in-the-head art student. Bette proposes that she make a statement and Jodi do some sort of mea culpa.

Molly interrupts; Phyllis insists that she sit down and meet the upstanding lesbian citizens.

Phyllis: [whispering] They’re lesbians.
Hee. Phyllis still cracks me up, and is obviously perfect for Joyce.

Out of nowhere, Jodi resigns, shocking the room. She supports the student’s provocative art but knows that Bette never would have approved it.

Jodi: I love teaching here. I love my class. [to Bette] But it sucks that your job is jeopardized by something that I’m totally responsible for. So, I can’t live with that. I’m resigning. But remember, I have my work. And, most importantly, I have you. So I’ll be fine.
Fine is definitely not the word Bette’s thinking right now. It’s the right number of letters, though.

The artistic temperament – Niki is an hour and a half late; everyone on the Lez Girls set is annoyed. When Niki does arrive, she’s surly and uncooperative. She doesn’t want to “sniff the rosemary,” even though that’s definitely what Jenny did when Tina gave her a sprig as a gesture of goodwill in Season 1.

Niki: Who walks around with a plant for no reason?
Have you met Jenny, let alone boinked her in a closet? Jenny has her brief moment of bliss when she gets to yell “Action!” She seems so very directorial, doesn’t she? Niki doesn’t think the script makes much sense; she doesn’t want to pretend to be confused when Nina says she and Bev are trying to have a baby.
Niki: Everybody knows that lezzies are having babies all over the place, Jenny.
Gosh, it’s like she’s been reading AfterEllen.com!

Jenny reminds Niki that the character “in my script” is naïve and has never met a lesbian before.

Niki: What about Ellen and Portia? I mean, does she not have a TV?
Good point. It’s true that lesbians have become a lot more visible in the last decade, and The L Word is a big part of that. And now we’re spoiled for everything else – hand-holding and head-butting on Cashmere Mafia just won’t satisfy us anymore.

Niki is dissatisfied too. She storms off the set to go pout in her trailer. Dorothy Snarker has the perfect image-math representation of what happens next. Let’s just say it isn’t wise to keep your mic pack on when you’re making out with the director in your “room.”

Two peas in a psycho pod – William the financier has arrived, just in time to get the scoop from Adele. (Side note: I don’t really know what William’s last name is. In the first episode of this season, it was Halsey, but in the second, somebody made a typo and it was Hasley – and Shane even pronounced it that way. I’m just going to call him William Reed Halsey Barker, in honor of Swoosie Kurtz’s character on Sisters.)

Adele very carefully explains that Niki and Jenny are “kind of involved with one another.” William doesn’t like it at first, but Adele knows just how to spin it.

Adele: [Niki’s] just so young and so fresh and green.
Like a sprig of rosemary!

Adele says Jenny just had to “make Niki her lover” in order to keep her from dropping out of the picture.

William: Well, that’s interesting. That’s a very interesting approach, Adele.
She pretty much blinds him with her crazy science. But Aaron is screaming at Jenny nearby. He starts to present his side of the story to William, but William just wants to greet Jenny.
Jenny: [pointing to Aaron and pouting] He’s being so mean to me!
I can’t decide whether I want to smack her or kiss her. William is definitely on her side, though.
William: That little Niki Stevens. Her movie hasn’t even opened yet, and already she’s out of control. Jenny: Well, she’s a bit fragile. William: Well, if there’s anyone who can take a fragile person and glue them back together, I think that would be you.
Fine, but will all the parts be in the right places? Or are we talking about abstract carnival art here?

A sobcast – Alice records the intro for her next podcast, which of course comes to us direct from the set of Lez Girls. She keeps tearing up, though. Come back, Tasha!

A Denbo is a person in your neighborhood – A security guard tells the movie moguls there’s a problem with the neighbors. It seems some of them don’t want their neck of the woods to be a “hotbed of lesbian sex and salaciousness.” Guess who the restless natives are?

Tina: She doesn’t even live in this neighborhood.
I gotta say, Tina: The black-T-shirt-and-shades look really works for you. Rrawr! It looks much hotter on you that it does on Delta Dawn. William strolls up (well, he limos up) and pays them to pipe down and go away. Wait, has that always been an option on this show? ‘Cause, speaking of limos, we could have been spared a whole lotta Papi scenes.

Nobody saw that coming – Shane (Shane in her glasses! Yay!) cuts Adele’s hair just the way she wants it. Which is just like Jenny’s.

Just passing by – Bette and Kit visit the set. As they walk, Bette tells Kit about the soapstone-gun art project. Kit mentions that she’s “thinking about” getting a gun.

Bette: You’re not gonna feel safe with a gun. A gun does not make you feel safe!
But she wasn’t at the shooting range when Kit was making her badass face.

Tina is happy to see Bette, even though Bette has brought her soccer-mom hair with her.

Tina: I can’t believe you’re here. Bette: I couldn’t resist.
They watch as Jenny does her thing.

Tina: Jenny is f—ing the star. Or should I say she’s f—ing herself?
Nearby, Max – yes, he’s still on the show – chats with Adele and says what we’re all thinking about her hair:
Max: Seems like it’s a pretty popular cut around here.
Also nearby, Alice, Kit and Shane plan to take down SheBar. Is this episode just sort of unraveling, or is it me? I feel like we’re just jumping around from line to line and I have to keep connecting them with nearby.

Max takes a seat and tells them that Adele said Shane insisted she cut her hair like Jenny’s.

Shane: Why would she say that?
Nobody knows. I sure don’t know why we’re ending the episode right here, after one more nugget from Bette:
Bette: [to Tina] It’s gonna be great. It’s gonna be great because you’re producing it.
Next time on The L Word: Turkish oil wrestling, Shane’s latest fling and Kelly McGillis.

Phenomenal photo research assistance provided by Phantom.

Can’t get enough of The L Word? Check back Wednesday, when the We’re Getting Nowhere vloggers offer their take on this episode, and keep up on the latest L Word forum topics, news, articles and interviews in our main L Word section.

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