“Glee” recap (5.13): I dare you to love me

Truly, there has never been a more accidentally meta commentary on this or any television show. April and Holly stand in the doorway smiling. Their goal, their stated and plotted goal, was to save glee club, at which they failed monumentally. And as they stand there watching the flame of New Directions burn out right before their very eyes, the manifestation of their failure, they toast their success. And also agree to celebrate by taking a lackadaisical trip around the world robbing banks. Have you ever seen a more astute metaphor?
Glee: Here’s what we’re going to do.

Glee: [Fails spectacularly at what it said it was going to do.]

Glee: [Glasses clink!] We did it!

Glee: [Plots more crimes.]
Graduation is short and it is sweet. I really wanted to see Sue’s face when Blaine’s graduation speech was a half-hour-long choreographed musical montage complete with costumes and props and a smoke machine. Alas. Tina announces that she’s going to Brown, instead of New York. (Oh, Jenna Ushkowitz, I will miss how much you were able to do with how little you were given.) The New New Directions hug it out and say goodbye. (Oh, all you guys whose names I never learned except Alex Newell who is wonderful in every way, I’m sorry the writers never gave you something to do that made me care about you. You’re all very pretty.) Becky and Sue embrace on stage. (Oh, Lauren Potter, you are a wizard; I wish you’d had one last chance to flip a xylophone.) Santana even pulled some strings to get Brittany a diploma.
In the bathroom, Santana tells Brittany that her research into Lesbos has revealed some shocking information: It’s an island full of German tourists and not like an Olivia cruise. So, new plan. Lesbos, yes, for a while. Then Hawaii for a couple of weeks. And then Santana wants Brittany to come with her to New York to start a new life together. Brittany grins and shrugs shyly, like that’s all she’s been wanting Santana to say since she left Louisville. They kiss. And are perfect. And are endgame.
On the piano bench in the choir room that will soon be filled with computers, Will and Sue admit that even though they hate each other, they also love each other (and love to hate each other). Sue even got Will an interview to coach the kids over in Vocal Adrenaline. She’ll miss insulting him, mostly, and being inspired by him, occasionally. Oh, Sue. Won’t we all. She leaves, but before he goes, he turns off the lights and takes a bow.
Next week: Kurt and Blaine go shopping for twin beds, Sam gets a haircut, Artie is as boss in the Big Apple as he was in Lima, Rachel gets her own car and driver, and Brittany and Santana blow up FanFiction.net.

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