After last week’s jaw dropping, pulse racing turning point of The Good Wife, where we witnessed one of the most traumatic breakups of the entire current TV season—teaching us that law firm breakups are apparently just as wounding as human ones—I wasn’t sure if this week would be a slight let down. But I was wrong: all the muscles in my body felt exhausted at the end of it, worn out from all the tension. If this is the way the rest of the season is going to be, and it certainly seems that way, I might need some anti-anxiety drugs by the end of it. Kalinda again didn’t play a huge role in this episode, but I think this was the first time this season where I honestly didn’t even notice it, because every bit of my attention was already occupied.
This week’s episode is titled “The Next Day,” and it begins, brilliantly, from the very first second of that next day. We see each of our main hitters waking up from their slumbers, identical overhead shots of their faces on their pillows, so lovely in the last moments of peace before their eyes open and chaos once again descends. Will’s chaos starts in an entirely oversexual way, as his approach to dealing with all this tumult is to start having frantic sex with a random tattoo artist. Don’t get me wrong, I am in no way against frantic sex with tattoo artists! But the zeal in his eyes is manic, almost frightening, and gives me the creeps.
Diane wakes up in her and Kurt’s bed, and she immediately plunges into prepping for trial that day, for what she believes will be her last official case as a lawyer. There are too many things about this scene for my body to process. 1) Diane Lockhart is in bed, surrounded by satin and softness. Her hair is still a small slice of heaven. 2) She is nervous and fretful, a state we rarely ever get to see her in, studying notecards like a schoolgirl. 3) Yet, we know that all this nervousness is for naught, as her judgeship has already slipped through her unknowing fingers, released from the hands of Peter Florrick. Baby.
Alicia is awakened by a motherly Grace before she pronounces off to school. Grace continues to show conflicting signs this episode of continuing to grow into her sex appeal, or maybe just really, really wanting to talk to boys about Jesus. She will also tell her mother later in this episode that she wants to try shooting a gun. Grace is going through some stuff right now.
Anyway, Alicia has slept like a rock, so much so that she’s overslept, a fact that seems truly amazing to her, a bit gleeful, like it is something that does not happen to her often, or ever. Luckily, she doesn’t have far to travel to get to work, as Florrick & Agos is still chugging along loudly in her living room, with all manner of repairmen (who are indeed all men, as the age of women installing things and making repairs still hasn’t made it onto 21st century television) now running around to make her apartment up to temporary law office standards.
In the midst of this law firm upstart buzz, two women show up at Alicia’s door in rapid succession. One is Marilyn, Peter’s ethics lady, who apparently really needs to give Florrick & Agos a PowerPoint presentation right now. The other is a woman named Heather, played by Maria Dizzia, known to most of us as Polly Harper, Piper’s BFF on the outside in Orange Is the New Black. She’s the client in the trial that Diane was prepping so hard for, a trial involving her husband being killed by his own gun as he was being robbed; it fired after being knocked from his hand. Lockhart Gardner is suing the gun manufacturer because it was a faulty model, and just generally because guns are the worst. But even while Diane is preparing anxiously, Heather has dealt mostly with Alicia in the past, which is why she’s now standing on her doorstep.The counsel for the gun manufacturer is the ever dreadful Nancy Crozier, played so coyly by Mamie Gummer. And let’s all take a unrelated moment to mourn the fact that CBS didn’t pick up Backstrom, the series in which Mamie Gummer was supposed to be a lesbian cop this year. RIP, Lesbian Mamie Gummer. But back to The Good Wife. The guest stars are really on fire this episode, as the judge for the case is played by Richard Kind, who has been in too many things to count, although for some reason I still always remember him from Mad About You. And later, Grandpa Gilmore shows up! I love when Grandpa Gilmore shows up. But I am getting ahead of myself.
As the trial gets under way, Diane and Evil Nancy Crozier are soon whisked into judge’s chambers, where they’re informed there’s been an “administrative” issue. Enter in Heather with Alicia Florrick and Cary Agos. Richard Kind goes through this hilarious bit in his chambers where he asks them all to hold their fists in their hands and “squash” their frustration down so the other can talk, a stress release technique he teaches to gang members, he says, to the point where they are all sitting in a row, Cary and Alicia and Diane and Nancy Crozier, and he’s like, “Squash it! Squash it!” until they finally all do it and I am dying.
But in the end Heather still wants to go with Alicia, who she knows. So Diane isn’t going to be a judge, and she isn’t going to get to argue what she thinks will be her last case, which involves an issue she’s passionate about. It is already shaping up to be a rough day for Diane Lockhart.
Will is obviously pissed about what appears to be a client-snatching when he learns of it, and is like, hey, whatever, we’ll just refuse to give them the case files. Or rather, they pretend to send over the case files, but all the boxes are filled with fake rats, because Will is really mature. Alicia says, fine, I’ll just refer this to the mediation thing where lawyers who can’t be nice to each other have to go, the one who brought you down a few years ago, Mr. Will. Which is obviously meant to be an ouch but just makes Will more determined. Grandpa Gilmore rules over this mediation, and sides with Alicia. One for Florrick & Agos.
It is also after this initial meeting with Grandpa Gilmore that Diane gets her first hint that all may not be well in Supreme Court Judge Land. Back in the offices, she pulls Kalinda aside in what maybe just I am reading as a suggestive manner, and asks her to investigate it personally for her.
Kalinda looks back at Diane as she walks away like she is the only one around here who still cares about her heart.
Kalinda later confirms it: Diane is out. Diane calmly walks into a restroom and chokes out a few sobs in the most gut-punching way possible.
When Florrick & Agos finally get the files for the gun control case, they’re all, YAYYY, except almost everything has been redacted from them. Like, everything. Aw, snap, Lockhart Gardner. Except this is already exhausting me, and I want to yell, “Stop being babies and give them the files!” But alas, I guess that wouldn’t make for as compelling of an episode. So they go back to Grandpa Gilmore, who shakes his head at Will once again, and while Diane is now full of fire and pushes back, Cary still wins.
Interesting note here: Robin comes in to give Cary evidence while Kalinda is being interviewed as part of this whole thing. When Robin realizes Kalinda is also present in the room, there is an awkward, “Hi,” “Hi,” exchange that goes on, but it is not really antagonistic, probably the first Florrick Agos/Lockhart Gardner interaction that has NOT been antagonistic. It is almost friendly, in a hesitating way. Meaning: the dream of Robin and Kalinda still having some type of relationship in the future lives on! Never say die!
As Alicia continues to argue the case in court, she also pulls a switcheroo that packs yet another punch to Diane’s perfect face, although I honestly don’t believe Alicia means it personally. She hires Kurt—as in Diane’s husband Kurt—to be the ballistics expert on the case, the case that used to be Diane’s, to help her win the case that Diane wanted to win. Kurt does resist this conflict of interest at first, but then Alicia points out that the case isn’t actually about them, but a woman whose husband died unnecessarily. Which is, by the way, the first time anyone in this episode has pointed this out. Kurt can’t resist this notion of, you know, justice.
In the end, though, Lockhart Gardner still refuses to give over the entirety of the case files, finally getting the upper hand by some financial wrangling of Heather’s retainer agreement. Heather goes back to Lockhart Gardner, essentially being bullied to their side. Diane walks triumphantly into the courtroom; Alicia and Cary awkwardly exit. The first battle is complete.
After getting the confirmation of her judge fail from Peter, Diane asks Will if he’ll have her back. Since Will is still in Hulk Smash mode, he’s like, “Sure, as long as you will also smash with me!” Diane says she’s game, albeit with a little less crazy eyes than Will continues to sport.
Florrick & Agos, meanwhile, continue running around Alicia’s apartment, desperately in need of office space. Some lowly tax lawyers have extra space and offer to help them out, until they learn at the end of the episode that Lockhart Gardner has bought them out, and they can no longer extend the offer. Will raises his fists in the air in exultation. Hulk Smash!
Some other weird stuff that goes on: It turns out that drop dead gorgeous Ethics Marilyn is also pregnant, and keeps puking as she also keeps hanging out around Alicia’s apartment, waiting for her to be not-busy so they can chat. Turns out what she really wants isn’t too brief a startup on ethics, but to get the scoop on Peter possibly having personal matters interfere with his politics. (i.e., going after Chumhum to get them to go to Alicia’s side). Weird than an ethics officer would be interested in that! Alicia essentially tells her to back off, and it seems like Marilyn does, but it’s clear Peter is not going to get out of this season unscathed.
Also, the tattoo artist that Will continues to have lots of rage-fueled sex with says out of the blue, “So I know we’ve only known each other for three days, but I want your baby. Like, I just want a baby. So I want you to put your sperm in me and then leave.” And Will’s like, “Huh?” And she’s like, “Haha, just kidding, God, I can’t believe you fell for that, silly,” and then later, she’s like, “No, but, baby.” So. That’s weird! Man, I can’t wait for all the messes Will is going to get himself into this season.
What were your thoughts on “The Day After”?
