“Mistresses” recap (1.09): Ladies Who Lunch


At Casa Davis, Savi is doing work when her mom comes with a glass of wine for her. Savi conveniently uses the work she needs to do as an excuse to not drink, and her mom says she certainly didn’t get the responsibility gene from her or her father. This mention of her father reveals that her father split after Mama Janet had an affair and got pregnant with Joss. And suddenly Savi makes a little more sense.

Mama Janet asks Savi why she isn’t fighting for Harry, because she’s never not fought for anything. Savi can’t bring herself to confess everything to her mom, so she just says goodnight.

Zombie Paul decides the best way to get to April is through her friends, starting with the weakest link, so he shows up at Karen’s door. He tells her that he’s not leaving LA until he can talk to her again, but he noticed that April seems to have a new person in her life. Karen tells him Hot Dad’s name and social security number because she’s a genius. He even tells her that she was the most reasonable one in the group, which means either a lot has changed in the last three years, or being dead really rotted Paul’s brain.

At the Brazilian-themed going away party, Janet is flirting with the hot young bartender when Joss sidles up to chat with her Mama. She offers to come stay with her in Brazil for a few weeks, to help her get settled, spend some quality time together, etc. Mama Janet says that sounds lovely, and Joss gets all kinds of excited.


Reasonable Karen reasonably thinks the most reasonable time to tell April that Paul is still in town is while a party where April’s daughter, boyfriend, and boyfriend’s daughter are in attendance is in full-swing. Sounds reasonable. Predictably, April is pissed that Zombie Paul is not only still in town, but talking to her friends.

At the law firm, Dom is meeting with the wife of Karen’s dead ex-lover to tell her that she lost her settlement because of Karen’s notes. Almost immediately upon picking up the notes, she notices a discrepancy and proves Karen’s notes were forged. She plays the role of tattered widow well, but as soon as Dom runs off to get more information, a wicked grin spreads across her evil face.

Harry shows up at the party to say goodbye to Janet and says maybe she should tell her mom she’s prego, but Savi points out that it wouldn’t make a difference anyway, she’d be gone to Rio now or two weeks after the baby was born either way.


As the party comes to a close, Janet makes things awkward for everyone by accusing Harry of cheating. She finally figures out, from the pained looks and uncomfortable silence, that it was Savi who cheated. Savi runs out and Janet follows, apologizing and saying that she would never judge her. At her breaking point, Savi basically accuses Janet of being a neglectful mother. She reminds her of Joss’s 7th birthday, when Janet was in Cavo. Savi was 15, and she knew her sister’s birthday would go forgotten, so she bought Joss the necklace she still has to this day. Mama Janet legitimately didn’t remember that it wasn’t her that gave Joss the necklace, that’s how good Savi was at covering for her. Mama Janet says she did her best, but Savi returns a look that says maybe her best wasn’t enough.

The real kicker? Joss overheard everything.

Home alone, April answers her door to find Zombie Paul once again. This time, he demands to see Lucy. Seriously, April, get Savi to call Ella in Rosewood so they can reveal their true identities as the Halliwell sisters and vanquish this demon for you. Instead, she decides to tell Hot Dad about Zombie Paul’s reanimation next time he comes over.

Morning brings Savi and Janet back together in the kitchen. Mama Janet tells her oldest daughter that she’s her own person, showing few qualities of either of her parents. She raised herself, she’s strong; Mama Janet is in awe of her. She also says that she thinks Savi will make an amazing mother, not realizing that it’s actually all Savi needed to hear.

Karen, in her most recent attempt to get herself murdered, decided to add a sketchy private investigator to the mix. Unfortunately, he can’t tell if the widowed psychopath is actually capable of murder, so there’s no way to know if she actually killed her husband. He says he should just ask her, because Karen seems capable of cutting through people’s crap, but it turns out the wife is better at that, because by the end of the day, Karen is served in the case of the wrongful death of her dead ex-patient/lover.

In Savi’s kitchen, Joss has a big adorable hat on while waiting for Mama Janet to pick her up.


Savi comes by to see her off, and it was lucky she was there, because Mama Janet called to shatter Joss’s poor little heart. Joss does a wonderful job of hiding the fact that she’s on the verge of tears while she wishes her mom safe travels, but her face is absolutely broken when she hangs up, because unlike Savi, Joss has a world of chances for her mother, and really believed this time would be different.

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