The life of a lesbian consists of two seasons: The Season of Pretty Little Liars and The Season of Woe. Thanks Vanderjesus above, this year’s Season of Woe is almost over! In five days, Pretty Little Liars returns with a recap episode of season three, and then the following week, it’s season four, bitches! To ready ourselves for the main event, I’ve counted down the 25 best moments of last season. 25. Spencer loses her bra The only thing she’s better at than hide-and-seek is strip-trivia. 24. Jenna comes out of the closest Bitch can see she likes the ladies! 23. Mona goes to church Nerdy Mona praising the Lord with her heart and her dance moves was one of the most flawless flashbacks we’ve ever seen. 22. “You may have heard I killed a guy.” Is a thing Emily said to her therapist before she was hypnotized into believing she bludgeoned Ali to death with a shovel. 21. Ashley Marin learns the gay lingo “What’s a pink drink? Is that code for something gay?” 20. Mona enjoys Spoby’s Pinot While Spencer sits outside sobbing her eyeballs out and begging Toby to open the door and explain why he’s A, Mona sits inside listening to classical music, sipping on their anniversary wine.
19. Mamaw Marin sings the National Anthem Because she can. 18. Wedding Cakes from Outer Space No, seriously, you two, tell us about love on your planet. 17. Cousin Nate gets gutted And that’s what happens when you fuck with our lesbian characters, Lyndon James! 16. Kahn Kabin Truth or Dare Although we’ll never really understand why Jenna and Spencer didn’t jump across that coffee table and tear each other’s clothes off. 15. Sparia Canoodles In one of the cutest scenes ever, Spencer reminisces about secretly shaving off her dad’s sideburns for her Nana.
14. Paige embraces her soft butch Suspenders and cut-offs and dropped crotches, oh my! 13. Spencer can’t stop staring at things Damn you, phallic fruit! Damn you to infinity! 12. Paige drops the “L” word She’s in lesbians with Emily. 11. Mona and Spencer go toe-to-toe Both cocky as hell and completely unhinged. We could’ve watched them alphabetize former Soviet republics for hours. 10. Spencer and Ali share a slow-dance In the basement of an insane asylum in the middle of the night. You know, for practice. For boys.
9.Mona’s Made Up Language One of the most satisfyingly creepy moments in a season filled with goosebumps on top of goosebumps. Mona plays with her santitarium dolls and speaks in code to the Liars about how they’ll all be dead soon. 8. Emily gets some new jewelery Just a necklace made out of the teeth of her first dead girlfriend. 7. The Liars go to the bathroom together Everything that happens in the bathroom is the best. 6. Paige wants a coconut cupcake And she won’t stop until she finds one that doesn’t taste like old pennies! 5. Do-ragley van Cullen Prison changes a man.
4. Hanna walks into a lesbian bar Where she is assaulted by flirtinis from every one in the room. 3. CeCe thrashes a snake With a mannequin leg. 2. Paige thrashes some trash cans Because Cousin Nate’s face was otherwise occupied. 1. Emily was looking for something She was looking for someone, and she came here. Don’t look away.
What was your favorite moment of season three?
