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The 20 Best Fictional Women in Politics

We’re still two months away from the US.. presidential voting day and I am suffering from big-time election fatigue. If I have to sit through one more televised interview where an old white guy tells me what I can and cannot do with my own personal vagina, I am going to punch my TV in the face. So to ease my agitation, I’ve compiled a list of lobbying ladies we can actually believe in. Here are the 20 best fictional female politicians of all time.

“I’ve gotten to know the city councilmen pretty well because of my campaign. If you hear them talking about ‘that blonde pain in the ass, that’s me.”

“I think you should say to these kids, ‘You think you get it wrong sometimes, you should come down here and see how the big boys do it.’ I think you should tell them you haven’t given up hope and that it may turn up, but, in the meantime, you want NASA to put its best people in a room and you want them to start building Galileo 6. Some of them will laugh and most of them won’t care but for some, they might honestly see that it’s about going to the blackboard and raising your hand.”

“There’s no mistake, Bill. When you veto someone’s funding that is not a mistake. When you hurt someone intentionally that is not a mistake.”

“How do you have patience for people who claim they love America, but clearly can’t stand Americans?”

“You like early Black Sabbath? It’ll make you mean!”

“Do you know what insubordination means? It means you’re grounded.”

“I’m going to go out there, and I’m going to take the oath of office. I’m going to run this government, and if some Islamic nations can’t tolerate a female president, then I promise you, it will be more their problem than mine!”

“Naomi, get to know me!”

“Make no mistake. The American people are terrified. They know something’s coming. They can feel it. And we can either shovel them the same old shit and call it sugar or we can arm them. We can arm them with a young, vibrant Vice President. We can give them heat, energy! Give them a war hero with heart, forged by enemy fire in the desert in the dark when American lives hung on the balance!”

“Dear Lord Jesus, I do not often speak with you and ask for things, but now I really must insist that you help me win the election tomorrow because I deserve it and Paul Metzler doesn’t, as you well know. I realize that it was your divine hand that disqualified Tammy Metzler and now I’m asking that you go that one last mile and make sure to put me in office where I belong so that I may carry out your will on earth as it is in heaven. Amen.”

“Tell her I’m canceling the lunch with Catherine that was supposed to prove there’s nothing more important than Catherine because something more important than Catherine has come up.”

“Now, here’s the problem as I see it. While Governor Bailey is beloved by all, ninety-eight percent of the voters rate you as despicable or worse.”

“I can help you find this son of a bitch, with full immunity and means. Your task force will have blanket authority to go after guys like Hesse and get them the hell off my island.”

“Thank you all for coming. I have a statement I would like to make. The attempted military coup against the lawful government of the Colonies is illegal, ill-advised, and clearly doomed to failure. I have not resigned the Presidency, and I will fight this action with everything at my command.”

Harriet Jones: Harriet Jones, former Prime Minister.

Dalek: Yes, we know who you are.

Harriet Jones: Oh, you know nothing of any human. And that will be your downfall.

“You make your own luck.”

“I’m sick to death of the bullshit and the egos and the men. I am so sick of the men, I could puke for days. I’m running for president.”

Abbey: Samuel Mudd set Booth’s leg after he shot Lincoln. Doctors are liable in this country if they don’t treat the patient in front of them.

Bartlet: Just for the record, this is why we don’t talk about foreign policy, which we do, but you don’t think we do enough.

Abbey: Why?

Bartlet: Because Samuel Mudd was tried and convicted of treason for setting that leg.

Abbey: So?

Bartlet: What ‘so’?

Abbey: So, that’s the way it goes. You set the leg.

Who’s your favorite fictional female politician?

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