“Rizzoli & Isles” Subtext Recap (3.05): Mama said there’d be gays like this


Maura runs up excited with news about Motherboard Martin, who dropped in during the midst of her good cry. She identified the soap mummy on site, which elicited a “you’re amazing” from her secret daughter. Now Maura is all excitedly tells Jane that her that her secret mother “likes Montepulciano, Lebanese zucchini and science fiction.” Um, is Lebanese zucchini code for dildo? Apple doesn’t fall far from the tree after all.

Maura finds another break in the case (don’t worry, I won’t go into detail because that’s so not why we’re here). Jane quickly deduces it involves the politician Mama R was so hot on. When Maura asks how she knew, Jane says a little sly, “Because I am also amazing.” Aw, someone is a little jealous.

The team is closing in on the killer. To speed things along Jane grabs a swab to test for blood on a piece of evidence. Maura insists that’s her job. Then, to show her girlfriend she can do Jane’s job, she takes a guess at what happened. A shocked Jane says she can’t guess, she’ll get hives. But Maura corrects her that she’s theorizing, which is perfectly a perfectly acceptable part of the scientific process.

The detectives get the proof they need to turn their theories into cold hard convictions and the cases are closed. Oh, sorry, the campaign manager did it. And the politician helped cover it up. Yadda yadda yadda. With the streets of Boston once again a safer place, Jane and Maura go out for a celebratory drink at the Dirty Robber. There they find Sister Winifred drinking alone and reading in a booth.

Maura asks Jane if they should join her. When the sister declines, Jane of course decides they must and scoots in, patting the booth for Maura to slide in next to her. Those two, it’s just second nature to be coupley and cute.

When they sit down, the cover on Sister Winifred’s copy of The Sounds and the Fury falls off. Underneath is the book On the Angel’s Wings of Desire. I’m guessing that’s the 50 Shades of Gray for the Catholic set. Sister Bitcher has a kinky side, I like it. Jane and Maura have a good laugh about it, and then both secretly wish they’d taken a peek inside the book. It never hurts to get some new ideas sometimes.

The saucy nun leaves only to have a sulky Giovanni walk up instead. The ladies try to cheer him with an obligatory, “You look hot.” But he is too disillusioned about the political process to even offer up a single threesome fantasy. Then Jane urges him to run for office himself, and aim high. The presidency maybe even. Think of the interns, Giovanni. Skirts optional. Now that’s what I call a lesbian bonding moment.

Now, here is a sampling of your much more satisfied #gayzzoli tweets from this episode. See what good a little gay can do for a person’s mood? Speaking of a little gay, did y’all notice that Jamie Babbit of But I’m a Cheerleader and Itty Bitty Titty Committee directed this episode? Like I was saying, a little gay around never hurts. Nope, not at all.

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