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N.Y. Scene: The Beach Edition

Summertime in New York City. The roof comes off at the Maritime Hotel Cabanas, allowing the sun to bathe the Bacchanalians at Stiletto. Pride thunders through town, leaving livers sputtering in its wake. Then what? We descend upon the Jersey Shore to play dodgeball, and then it’s off to Fire Island.

Diva on the Shore, July 22-25, 2010 @ Asbury Park, NJ Yes, dodgeball. Every year, women from all over the mid-Atlantic region and beyond congregate in Asbury Park, NJ to throw balls at each other and toss back some drinks at Diva on the Shore. Thanks to MTV, the Jersey Shore conjures up images of orange people with caked-on hair product pumping their fists to trance and techno, but the coast of New Jersey is home to many shore towns, each with its own unique character. After a period of decline, Asbury Park has in recent years become revitalized as a gay resort town. If you find a “gorilla juicehead” in Asbury Park, he probably works out at the David Barton Gym in Chelsea and worships Lady Gaga.

Diva can be described as a grittier Dinah Shore or the Aquagirl of the Northeast and it revolves around a lesbian beach dodgeball tournament. A good number of women don’t actually play dodgeball and just show up for the dancing, drinking, disco bowling, and pool parties. This year, the City of Asbury Park clocked in over 3,400 people on the beach during the tournament.

Diva is the brainchild of Angelique Irizarry, co-owner of Shescape, a lesbian events company that has produced mega-events for women for more than two decades. As with many successful ideas, Diva started unintentionally.

“I was sitting on the beach with a bunch of friends on Fire Island and noticed that there weren’t many girls there,” she said. “I decided to run to buy some PVC piping, deer netting and some duct tape, and I went back to the beach and created a dodgeball court. Women started to gather, ending up with about 20 players on one court. From there, the idea was born. The next year we returned with eight teams of 12.”

Diva started out as a one-day event, but more events, such as the pool party and White Party, were added as women requested other activities. It eventually moved to Asbury Park to accommodate more people.

Many teams that enter the Diva on the Shore tournament are formed by lesbian bar and club owners and lesbian club promoters. Said Diva’s resident deejay, DJ JeNRG, who promotes several events around town including Vitamin D*** Saturdays @ Milk Lounge and Fabuloso Airways Tuesdays @ Skyline Cafe, “Angelique’s Diva events are one of the very few events that bring the lesbian community together, especially since there is so much competition out there between bars, promoters, teams, and so on. This event allows everyone [to] leave all of their differences at home. It brings our community together for drinks, activity, and unity.”

Of course, this raises the following question: Doesn’t it seem counter-productive for these businesses and cliques who normally compete during the year to be placed in a situation where they are actually throwing objects at each other’s heads? Not so. A German friend of mine once told me that, nowadays, Europeans channel all of their aggression into the game of soccer, and that is why Europeans don’t start wars. This concept appears to be working in NYC’s lesbian scene as well, as there have been no reports of civil unrest in lesbian clubland. And we have Angelique to thank.

Diva 2010 kicked off on July 22 with Thursday night disco bowling and a Friday afternoon pool party at the Berkeley Hotel. Then, comedians Michele Balan of Last Comic Standing Season 4 and Poppi Kramer entertained a crowd of women before a night cap at The Beach Bar. The next morning it was time to hit the beach. By 10AM, the heat was already oppressive. Because I like to put a positive spin on any situation, I’ll just say that it was hotter than Olivia Wilde double fisting flamethrowers in Hell, because if you add the image of Olivia Wilde shooting fire, Hell just got a whole lot nicer. Despite the brutal conditions, 24 teams of 12, plus around 3,000 spectators, attended the tournament, because not even 100 degree weather and the threat of heatstroke will keep lesbians away from competitive sports.

You’ve read a few articles on AfterEllen.com about the N.Y. lesbian scene, which generally revolves around lesbian nightlife and events. But there is another N.Y. lesbian scene which we haven’t tapped yet: the lesbian sports league scene, which according to one writer, “involves a lot less dim lighting and whole lot more interconnectivity and drama” than the lesbian nightlife scene. New York City is home to, among other things, a lesbian softball league, a lesbian flag football league, a lesbian basketball league, and yes, a queer dodgeball league. Not to be outdone, Big Apple Dodgeball (“BAD”), New York City’s LGBT dodgeball league, sent two teams to Diva on the Shore this year.

I caught one of the two BAD teams in its pre-game huddle. Executive board member Niki Kekos was animated, analyzing the other teams’ weaknesses and coming up with a game plan to bury them in a hailstorm of little red foam balls. As a non-athlete, all this talk sounded intense. And serious. Kekos assured me that it wasn’t. “I don’t know if ‘serious’ really captures the essence of our teams,” she said. “Our strategy was to have fun, play some classy dodgeball, and avoid sun stroke at all costs!” Apparently the BAD team didn’t need to train. According to Kekos, beach dodgeball is child’s play compared to what they’re used to. Said, Kekos, “I heard some teams practiced on the beach for weeks before the tournament; we just play real dodgeball on Monday nights with a bunch of gay men. You know – the kind you played with big rubber balls as a kid and have flashbacks about in your early adulthood – only this time you’re much bigger and stronger.” Jess Harris, also on the executive board of BAD, added, “Beach dodgeball is very tame in comparison to what we play. When we play, the balls are heavier and leave marks when you get hit. We’re pretty rough and tough,” she explained. Unfortunately, both BAD teams were eliminated in the first round. Kekos brushed off the loss and reported that no sports injuries were sustained. “I counted a few bruised egos and I still can’t feel the soles of my feet, but other than that, it was all good,” she said.

And then there is team Proposition. You know Proposition. They’re the ones behind the popular bi-monthly Friday night parties and a couple of wicked packed and generally insane NYC Pride events. Team Prop had the best of intentions. They trekked out to Asbury Park to win and bring home glory. But good intentions do not always lead to good results. Or do they?

I found team Prop lounging by the pool at the Berkeley Hotel. By that point in the afternoon, I, too, had decided to wave the white flag of defeat and retreat to a location with more hospitable conditions. Forget photojournalism. My scalp was starting to burn. You could have placed a skillet on my head and made a full English breakfast. They were passing around a bottle of Mezcal, which wasn’t of the “worm in the bottle” variety that you dare your friends to drink during spring break before they fall face first into a puddle of their own vomit. It was an artisanal small batch bottling called Ilegal Mezcal. Team Prop: keepin’ it classy at the Jersey Shore!

Was giving up dodgeball glory for this bottle of elixir and a dip in the pool worth it? A good journalist always seeks the truth, so I decided to go swimming and sample the mysterious liquor to answer this pressing question. After a grueling half an hour of back floating and mezcal swigging, I concluded that Team Prop made a wise decision. As teams were eliminated over the course of the afternoon, they made their way to the pool. What is the most logical thing to do after you’ve spent hours throwing balls around in 100 degree weather? Throw more balls around in 100 degree weather of course! Oh, lesbians.

So who won the tournament? Team Henrietta Hudson. This photograph was taken during one of their earlier matches, but it looked like they were already celebrating. Then it was time to get ready for the White Party. While not unusual in southern California or Miami, white parties are rarely seen in the New York City metropolitan region, so treat these photographs like you would photos of unicorns or chupacabras. The weekend ended with a tea party at the Oceanside Beach Bar Sunday afternoon. Diva on the Shore 2010 isn’t over yet, though. A slimmer, more streamlined Diva will be held in just a couple of weeks in Asbury Park to bid farewell to the summer. To find out more, click here.

My Vacation @ Cherry Grove, Fire Island, NY

The New York City region has three gay beaches: Asbury Park, Cherry Grove on Fire Island, and Fire Island Pines. We’ve already covered Asbury Park, and now we’re moving on to Fire Island.

Fire Island is essentially a large sandbar off the coast of Long Island where some enterprising folks have erected beach houses, restaurants and nightclubs. Building communities on a shifting pile of sand may sound impractical and silly, but Fire Island is a popular vacation destination, and the real estate is very expensive. Fire Island can only be reached by ferry, and no cars are allowed; thus, despite the fact that Fire Island is less than two hours from New York City, it feels like you are half a world away.

There are two gay beaches on Fire Island, Cherry Grove (“The Grove”) and Fire Island Pines (“The Pines”). The Grove is perceived to be the quirkier, campier and more “working class” of the two, and The Pines is dotted with designer homes and has a reputation for catering to affluent “look at me!” gays, although both communities are equally unaffordable, so, really, the only differences between them are aesthetics and attitude.

The ladies and older gay men tend to travel to The Grove, and during high season The Pines can be mistaken for an Abercrombie & Fitch modeling convention. In short, during the summer, Park Slope and the Village move to the Grove, and Chelsea moves to the Pines.

A few friends and I are at the Grove, and we are staying at the Bauhaus, which is one of the more modern rentals in the community. In years past, we’ve roughed it at some places, but we’re getting old and discriminating. Now we demand actual bed space and air conditioning.

The Grove is home to a few bars and nightclubs, including Cherry’s, Tides and The Ice Palace, which become lively and even anarchic on the weekends, but for a nightlife reporter, going to bars and nightclubs feels like work, so I’m avoiding them at all costs. Instead, we spend our days gobbling down steamers at my favorite restaurant at The Grove, Jumping Jacks Seafood Shack, which overlooks the ocean.

What else does a nightlife reporter do while on vacation, you ask? From Cherry Grove, with love, Grace

All photos by Grace Chu unless otherwise noted. If I took your picture and you’re not in this article try looking over here.

 

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