Editor’s Note: We first published this story in September 2017, and I wanted to share it again in honor of Lesbian Visibility Day!
Megan Evans and Whitney Bacon (now officially Mrs. and Mrs. Bacon-Evans following their September 28th wedding!) make up the lovely, inspirational lesbian couple Wegan, beloved by their many fans on their YouTube channel and blog, What Wegan Did Next. We’ve followed their journey of love over the years, from their long distance relationship to civil partnership to their wedding in Palm Springs, California. We’ve been inspired and mesmerized by their commitment, not just to each other, but to the LGBT community as a whole, particularly the lesbian community. The couple is a face and a voice for femme visibility, and created the Find Femmes app to help other femmes find love. I was fortunate enough to speak with the beautiful brides in between their hectic week of wedding preparations, and I think you’ll find them as delightful and charming as I do. These ladies are the definition of #lovewins!
AfterEllen.com: I’m sure most AfterEllen readers know you and your transcontinental love story that has inspired so many. But for those who aren’t familiar, how did the two of you meet?
Wegan: We actually met on Myspace! Whitney was studying in Hawaii and went home to Kentucky for Christmas. She was up with jet lag and decided to randomly search for an English lesbian girl as she loved the British accent… She had to google for a random post code and VOILA I came up on the first page. Whitney says “one click changed my life”. We didn’t date online but chatted over a couple of years, increasing in the lead up to Whitney coming to study abroad in London in 2008 (which she says was always a long term dream and nothing to do with me!..)
So we met the first weekend she arrived in London and then two weeks later decided to make it official! It was pretty much love at first sight when we met in person – though I was more nervous as she didn’t tell me she had 8 of her friends from the University of Hawaii waiting with her!!… Some of those friends are at the wedding!
AE: How did you get interested in making your YouTube videos, and what do you ultimately hope your audience will get from your stories?
Wegan: We actually started uploading videos to Youtube before being ‘YouTubers’ was even a thing. Megan had set up a blog www.whatwegandidnext.com to document our long distance relationship, as well as to showcase our love as being out & proud lesbians; as growing up we felt a lack of lesbian role models. Megan would take pictures and film when we were together and started uploading them to YouTube, then it just grew from there. We naturally started to get a following & Megan enjoys editing our lives together to look back on one day.
AE: Lesbian visibility is so important, so thank you for being so open to sharing your lives with the world. Historically, femme/femme lesbian couples sometimes run into the issue where society doesn’t take them as seriously, or they are misrepresented. Is this an issue that’s important to you and how do you address that? What’s the most common misconception about lipstick lesbians?
Wegan: Lesbian visibility, in particular femme visibility is so important to us. As we said, it’s one of the reasons why we started putting our faces online. It’s amazing and humbling to receive message from girls and women who tell us that we’ve helped them realize they can be gay and feminine; that they don’t have to change who they are. We have found that as a femme/femme couple that we aren’t taken as seriously in both the hetero & LGBTQ world. We suffer from ‘femme invisibility’ in that we slip under the radar and neither side quite believes that we’re gay! The more & more LGBTQ women come out, the more we won’t be questioned. There’s still a great lack of lesbian visibility in the media.
We get asked by strangers if we’re sisters ALL the time! It’s crazy. We wouldn’t go up to a boy and girl and ask if they’re brother & sister! We even had a woman at Victoria’s Secret ask if we are MOM and DAUGHTER. We are one year apart in age… are you kidding?! (In case you’re wondering, they thought Megan was the Mom!)
The most common misconception of lipstick/ femme lesbians are that it’s a phase, that you ‘just haven’t met the right man yet’ or that a guy think it’s an invitation to a threesome!… no, no and no!
AE: You founded a dating app called Find Femmes that is for femme women looking for love. Is the app mostly for femmes or also for women who might not be femme, but date femmes?
Wegan: We founded Find Femmes as we had followers constantly asking us ‘how do I find a femme?’ We felt frustrated that we didn’t have a good answer for them, so we decided to do something about it. Find Femmes is for femme LGBTQ women but also those who love femmes. We’re not about segregating the LGBTQ community! Just because we’re in a femme/femme relationship it doesn’t mean that every other femme in the world wants to be! Whatever makes you happy!
AE: What was the hardest thing about the four years you spent living so far from each other (besides missing each other , of course!) and what is your advice for women who meet online and live far apart?
Wegan: It was one of the most difficult things we both endured in terms of what the heart wants/needs. The hardest part was not being able to simply give the other a kiss, cuddle or hold hands. Even doing the mundane things like going to the grocery store together. During our distance, we didn’t have the tools that are available now for instance, Facetime. We had Skype which never worked for us, and we did have Whatsapp during the last couple of years of our long distance journey, which definitely helped in those high phone bills we racked up.
Our advice to those women enduring the same journey is to make sure that you both are first clear in that you are both in it for the long haul and that you’re both willing to put in the same commitment. Trust and communication is even more important when it’s a LDR.
AE: The two of you were joined in civil partnership back in 2012, and are getting married this month, is that right? Tell us a bit about the wedding!
Wegan: Yes, we had a small intimate Civil Partnering in the UK on the 28th of September 2012, so we’re finally ‘upgrading’ with a big wedding on our 5th year anniversary – September 28th, 2017! We fell in love with Palm Springs when we visited for Dinah Shore last year. We didn’t like any venues in the UK so decided that Palm Springs was more our vibe. We have around 35 guests from both the UK and USA attending and we can’t wait!
We were the first lesbian couple to appeared on Say Yes To The Dress UK, and there was a bit of drama with our dresses, but long story short, we are are absolutely delighted with our stunning Dando London dresses that compliment each other. It’s going to be a very feminine and chic wedding with lots of blush pink and gold, and a few desert accents. Our wedding planners Cathy & Dorry, COJ events, have been absolutely amazing and they’re also a married lesbian couple. We all get on so well and they feel like family to us. In fact Cathy is going to be marrying us! We can’t wait for a day to celebrate our love with our nearest and dearest (and lots of champagne…)
AE: Will you live in the UK after the wedding or do you have any plans to move?
Wegan: We will be returning back to England in early December as we have planted roots there, I.e. Our home (aka Wegan Manor) and our beautiful cat Kisses. However, we do plan on also getting a property in the states in the near future, likely in Southern California so we can travel back and forth. Not sure where life is taking us, but we do love traveling the world together and seeing all the world has to offer with the one we love. Who knows where Wegan will go next!
AE: I think it’s wonderful to see a couple who is obviously so in love. I’m sure a lot of women see your relationship as being perfect, but is there such a thing? Do you ever argue, and if so, what about?
Wegan: Thank you, you are too kind. We genuinely are so incredibly in love and we are so thankful we found each other (thank you Myspace- shout out to Tom! haha). I think due to the fact we endured long distance for four years, it has really set us up nicely to really appreciate each other and never take the other for granted. Of course we do have arguments (more like bickering) from time to time, but usually over something silly like Whitney not listening to Megan when she says make a left turn rather than a right… and when it’s PMS time! We always quickly makeup and move on. It never lasts long.
AE: You travel frequently together. What is your favorite place you ever traveled? Is there anywhere that you saw as being particularly lesbian friendly?
Wegan: We will always hold a special place in our heart for Hawaii as it truly is magical and still one of the most beautiful places we have ever seen. Also, the people are some of the kindest souls you’ll ever meet. It is also very LGBT friendly, it’s the ‘rainbow’ state after all. 🙂
In addition, we love travelling to Greece, particularly Mykonos, which is very LGBT friendly, so scenic and the people are also incredibly friendly and hospitable. And Greek food, yes please! Palm Springs also, of course!
AE: You recently posted a video on your channel What Wegan Did Next with some exciting news about quitting your jobs. So whats next for Wegan? What will Wegan do next?
Wegan: Yes, we recently took the plunge and quit our full time jobs! Megan was working in Human Resources and Whitney worked in Account Management/ Digital Marketing. As much as we loved our jobs, it was getting more & more difficult to juggle running our blog, YouTube channel, social media accounts, attend events, run our dating site, oh and brewing our vegan bacon beer! (B.A.B.E. IPA )
Whitney was also missing America, after living in the UK for 6 years. So we decided to spend some time in America around the time of our wedding and focus on our projects. We love to travel together so it’s been amazing so far! We’re spending the month of September in California, the month of October in Hawaii (with our honeymoon in Maui), popping over to Las Vegas to see Britney Spears (!) and then ending up with November in Kentucky/ Tennessee with Whitney’s family. You can follow along our journey via our social media accounts & #WeganTravelsUSA.
Megan also wants to focus on creating more visibility of being gay and disabled as she has found by sharing about her disability to her left hand (Handy) that it has helped many others who have a disability, and even more so if they’re LGBTQ also.
We’ve already got a couple of speaking engagement arranged for next year and we’re just going to focus on what we love to do and see where the future takes us. We love working together and spending time together but also want to give back and make a difference to the world. We’re big believers in positive thinking the law of attraction. If you don’t ask, you don’t get. So wait to see what Wegan Did Next!
Megan’s instagram: @meganfromwegan
Whitney’s instagram: @wbacon11