Shoot ’em update


Ever wondered where you could pick up a heavyweight stroller that protects against all modern armor-piercing rounds, or ever needed expedited shipping on baby’s first megavolt taser? Is Paul Giamatti out to exterminate your kid and Clive Owen nowhere in sight? Well, you’re in luck. is the one-stop shopping spot for all of your family-friendly heavy artillery needs (work warning: video opens with website).

So Shoot ‘Em Up was No. 6 at the box office with disappointing earnings. At least their website is spooftastic. Sign me up for the ultra-light kiddie riot shield — and then sign me on as Monica Bellucci‘s bodyguard.

Did anybody make it to the theaters for this one? Was it “a fun, if messy, compilation of the most absurd action scenes ever put on celluloid?” Or “a one-dimensional cinematic treat best savored with one’s brain on pause?” If you’ve seen it, share — in those Rotten Tomato reviews, it’s hard to tell the laurels from the thorns!

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