‘How to Get a Girl Pregnant’ is a heartwarming memoir about a butch lesbian’s journey to motherhood
How to Get a Girl Pregnant is a heartwarming, humorous and candid memoir by Karleen Pendleton Jiménez that was published by Tightrope Books in 2011. If you are a lesbian couple hoping to have a baby, a butch woman or someone in love with one, or a two-mom family of any kind, really, you’ll relate to this book.
Karleen has wanted to have a baby for as long as she can remember. But one crucial element was missing in the life of the butch Chicana lesbian – the sperm. Though at times lighthearted, such as when Karleen considers all of the potential options for fertilization – some anonymous, some not – it is a weighty topic, and one that will change her life forever.
Here are two excerpts from the original memoir, which we highly recommend, as its a must-read for same-sex families, and bi and multi-racial/mixed families as well. The book is available on Amazon.“From How to Get a Girl Pregnant by Karleen Pendleton Jiménez (Tightrope Books, 2011). Reproduced with permission of Tightrope Books.”
The problem is that I have no idea how to look like someone who wants sperm. I know how to get a girl. I’ve mastered the lesbian cues, expectations, desires-Damn, I want the woman in the tight black miniskirt drinking the Corona at the end of the bar. I could watch her carefully, buy her another one just as she finishes, and then move in.
Knock it off. Focus on the men. I scan the room. Assessing men for their sperm is difficult for even the most politically astute of lesbians. What is it exactly I should look for, or avoid, in a sperm donor? In a bar, with only a few minutes to judge a potential father, I am a sucker for the superficial.
The author also speaks candidly about issues that face butch women specifically, and it makes us fall in love with her even more. She writes,I didn’t know until that moment that I wanted a baby, but when asked the question, there was no hesitation. I knew that I wanted a baby like I knew I wanted to breathe, eat, live. I spoke it and that truth became part of how I have seen myself in the world.
I also learned in that moment that my appearance, my boyishness, would lead people to believe otherwise. As a butch, I would alarm proper women like my mother, who would see me as someone who wasn’t going to make a family, make babies, make a home.