Some days I just want to be a Muppet. And I bet I’m not the only one. Don’t you have days when you’re sick of your job or stressed about the economy and you find yourself humming “C is for Cookie” or “Mahna Mahna,” and wondering which Muppet you could be?
Now, I’m already only a degree or two away from actual Muppetdom. In fifth grade I made a Dr. Bunsen Honeydew (think green Nerf ball) and used it to sing show tunes. (The fifth-grade chorus theme was “The Muppets Go to Broadway.”) Plus, my wife regularly opines that I am Muppet-like. (She also observes that I’m kind of like a 17-year-old boy in a garage band.)
But I digress.
The reason I’m even thinking about Muppethood right now is because of a recent discovery. While I once had to slog through the exhaustive work of cataloging my own personality traits and comparing them with those belonging to a host of Muppets, I can now simply answer a few questions in the “What Muppet Are You?” quiz and, in seconds, learn my true Muppet identity. And you too can have hours (or minutes) of fun and self-discovery by clicking here and answering scientifically designed questions such as “How big are you?” and “What is your favourite colour?”
Before subjecting myself to the scientific rigor of the quiz, I might have self-assessed as Grover.
I’m fairly sweet and friendly, and I’m anxious enough to be afraid of the monster at the end the book – before I realized it was me, of course.
(Sorry if I just spoiled the ending for anyone.)
But according to the experts, my true Muppet identity is …
These results indicate I am “reliable, responsible and caring,” and I “have a habit of waving your arms about maniacally.” All of this is actually quite true.
My favorite expressions are “Hi ho!”, “Yaaay!” and “Sheesh!” And my hobby is “sitting in the swamp playing banjo.”
I think Kermit is a pretty accurate call for me. (And I’m not at all surprised that my wife was identified as Statler or Waldorf!) But completing this quiz did remind me of the only thing I don’t like about the Muppets – they’re almost all male. I cannot really identify with any of them. I’m not vain enough for Miss Piggy or stoned enough for Janice.
Aside from Gonzo’s chicken lady friends and the occasional Sesame Street character, I cannot recall any other female Muppets.
Regardless, if you don’t mind being a male Muppet, take the quiz and report back with your Muppet identity.