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7 reasons we keep coming back to “Glee”

Next week Glee finally returns to our TVs after its seven-week hiatus, which means we only need one more countdown of seven to get us through the grueling break. Over the course of these countdowns, I’ve shared my own personal love-hate relationship with the gayest show on TV – and you’ve shared your similar love-hate relationship in the comments. So, this week, I thought I’d countdown the seven reasons I left Glee, but finally welcomed it back with open arms.

It was right around the time that Will kissed Coach Bieste out of some misguided sense of chivalry that I threw the remote control at the television and vowed, NEVER AGAIN! But Dorothy Snarker gently guided me back at the end of season two by sending me a supercut of Brittany and Santana’s scenes together, culminating with Santana’s “Lebanese” t-shirt. I rewatched from the beginning and sighed, “OK, again.” And here’s why:

The Good Ship Brittana

It started as a throwaway line between two supporting characters and launched the mightiest fandom known to man. I confess, I thought the writers were just dicking everyone around promising that Brittana was going to happen one day. At best, I thought we’d get a Sweeps Week peck on the lips. At worst, I thought they’d toy with every lesbian’s heart by offering up the most minimal subtext for all time.

But then, the craziest thing happened: The actual story broke through my almost-impenetrable wall of cynicism with such power and nuance and authenticity that I couldn’t help but fall in love with it. It resonates from every angle. On one side, you’ve got caustic, guarded Santana Lopez, the full-on lesbian who didn’t realize she was a lesbian until she looked up and saw that she’d built her entire life around her best friend. And on the other side, you’ve got innocent, open Brittany S. Pierce, the sexually fluid optimist who never questioned her love for her best friend. 

It was a two-second joke that became the very best thing about the show.

When Glee gets it right, it gets it so right

Glee‘s method of creating stories is basically just tossing every character into a hormone tornado and seeing what pairings come whizzing out the other side. Then: Have them sing a chart-topper about their sudden, uncontrollable feelings. It’s the weirdest. But there are those rare times when the writers send their characters on an organic journey and the journey tests and taunts them, but ultimately they come out the other side, illuminated with personal authenticity and triumph. And then they sing about it. It’s what made the pilot episode so special. And it’s what makes some storylines so real that I’m willing to forgive every other misstep.

Those damn earworm-y mash-ups

Even when I wasn’t watching Glee, I was secretly downloading the best songs onto my iPod. Nobody does mash-ups like this show. Nobody. 

Naya Rivera’s ascent to her rightful throne

Glee cast Naya Rivera to stand behind Quinn and dance and say rude things sometimes, but the more Naya the show gave to the audience, the more Naya the audience wanted. Not only is she perfect at spitting out the mouthful of zingers the writers give her; she owned the pathos of the show’s second season. The way she inhabited Santana, the way she gave herself over to the emotional turmoil of her sexual journey: she grounded the show with shocking gravitas. Oh, and guess what else: She can out-sing even Lea Michele. (You heard me!)

That one joke that always lands

Glee may pull some wackadoodle shenanigans, but when they give the right joke to the right actor, it’s some of the funniest stuff on TV. Brittany’s Lord Tubbington high jinks are some of my all-time favorites.

#GaySharks

– Valerie Anne (@PunkyStarshine) February 22, 2012

Yeah, that’s right: You guys make me LOL. Actually, you make me LOLOLOLOLOL. My favorite part about recapping Pretty Little Liars is reading the #BooRadleyVanCullen tweets, and my favorite part about watching Glee is reading the #GaySharks tweets. AfterEllen.com readers are the best and the silliest and the most fun. I like to laugh when you laugh, and I like to punch my TV in the face when you punch your TV in the face. (Thanks almost exclusively to Will Schuester.)

Dianna Agron’s face

Just … yeah. You feel me.

How excited are you for Glee to return?

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