“Grey’s Anatomy” SnapCap (8.16): “If You Were Lonely”

Last night’s episode of Grey’s Anatomy “If You Were Lonely” will give you a super-sad face. (Super-sad faces go all the way down to your lower neck.) Adele’s Alzheimer’s disease has substantially progressed, Cristina believes Owen is cheating and Derek blames racism for dirty looks he receives when he’s with Zola. (Don’t worry it’s not racism, Derek just doesn’t know how to do Zola’s hair, which I’ll elaborate on in the “Medical Mishaps” sections.)

AfterEllen Bait

Calzona is the superstar couple of this episode. Meredith brags to Cristina that Callie is “blowing her mind” at teaching her all she needs to know about taking her upcoming oral exam. (Sadly, no mind-blowing is actually shown.) And the patient that receives the most focus at Seattle Grace this week is a 14 oz baby boy. Alex nicknames the baby Ali for Muhammad Ali while the baby’s mother Morgan calls him Tommy. Having baby Ali/Tommy on the show means pediatrician Arizona Robbins gets some extra screen time. (It’s disturbing that a baby needs to suffer for Arizona to get adequate storylines.)

Feelings, Feelings, Feelings!

A sleeping Richard wakes up to his home’s smoke alarm going off. Adele has started a fire in the kitchen and Richard’s arm is injured while he tries to put out the fire. Fearing for Adele’s safety, Richard takes Adele to check out the late Ellis Grey’s former Alzheimer’s care facility Rose Ridge. While at Rose Ridge Adele seems more confused then ever so Richard takes her home and commits to taking care of Adele himself. Meredith insists that Richard can’t care for Adele on his own.

A guilt-stricken Richard explains, “I made vows to Adele, vows that I have broken time and again… The least I can do is honor her in sickness. She stays home, and if necessary, so do I.”

While Richard is at work, Adele is home being cared for by a nurse. When Richard returns, Adele is having a tantrum and throwing things all over the dining room. Adele has quite an arm on her.

Adele yells at the intruders to leave because she thinks she’s a young girl and the nurse and Richard have broken into her parents’ home.

Later that evening Adele seems back to her old self again.

Adele: I have Alzheimer’s, don’t I?

Richard: Yes, sweetheart, you do.

Adele: Rose Ridge does seem like a nice place. We went there this morning, didn’t we? I think it’s best that I would go live there.

(Is you face frowning yet?)

Teddy is making no effort to forgive Owen and she scolds him in front of other staff members while operating in the OR. Then, when Owen offers to assist, Teddy screams, “Back the hell off!” Am I the only person who thinks Teddy needs to take a leave of absence to grieve?

Whores & Gore

Cristina is stalking the new nurse, Sarah Connor Chronicles actress Summer Glau, fearing that she is having an affair with Owen. (Yuck! Why would she want Owen?)

Cristina pages Owen to the on-call room to seduce him but Owen resists, saying, “What are you doing? Cristina! No, I’m working in the OR I don’t have time. Dammit, dammit! I don’t have time!” C’mon! There is always time for a little afternoon delight, well, except for Wednesdays and Thursdays. I’m pretty booked on both of those days until 8 pm. What about an early evening delight? What am I talking about? OK, back to this recap, already in progress ….

When Cristina witnesses Summer putting her hand on Owen during one of their hospital chats, she finally confides in Meredith, “I think Owen is cheating on me.”

Meredith: Did you see something?

Cristina: No.

Meredith: Did someone else see something?

Cristina: No.

Meredith: Did he do something?

Cristina: No.

Meredith: Well, then how do you know?

Cristina: I don’t know! I don’t know. I just know.

Meredith: Cristina…

Cristina: You know what? I’m being crazy. I’m crazy, right? This is totally crazy.

Meredith consoles Cristina: Ok. I really think he’s not cheating.

Cristina whips around (Willow Smith-style) and says, “I know that!” and then storms off.

After a long day at the hospital Cristina is home alone and she can’t help but rummage through Owen’s belongings. She even smells his dirty laundry, looking for evidence. Is she checking for Summer’s perfume or just enjoying Owen’s smell? Suddenly Owen shows up and Cristina races off to bed and pretends to be asleep. Owen looks at Cristina and then takes a shower. Now the question is, is Owen washing off the stench of an affair or just refreshing himself after a long day of being the Chief?

In other whorey news, Mark tells Avery that he’s too uptight and he needs to get laid. Mark is so determined he tries to get April to sleep with Avery.

Mark: You’re an attractive woman.

April: (looks around): Uh, me? (laughs)

Mark:You and Avery spend a lot of time together don’t you?

April: We do yes but we’re just study buddies.

Mark: He’s an attractive guy. Nice bone structure. Hypnotic eyes, etc.

April: I guess so?

Mark: Have you noticed how uptight he’s been lately?

April: Like I said we’re study buddies.

Mark: Study buddies should help each other out. Relieve some that stress maybe extend that buddy relationship.

April: Extend? I don’t…

Mark: You’re two attractive people. Any thoughts on how to elevate that stress?

April: We could go for walks?

Mark: Walks are good. Walks are nice. I was thinking since you’re already study buddies you could extend that relationship, become the other kind of buddies.

A shocked April screams out, “Dr. Sloane! This is sexual harassment! You know that right?”

Mark: I think of it as sexual encouragement. Think about it, Kepner!

Mark gives April a thumbs up while April scurries away, adding, “Take one for the team.”

No April does not sleep with Avery and, in the end, we learn that Avery isn’t interested in anyone because he’s still in love with Lexie.

Medical Mishaps

Premature baby Ali/Tommy is only 14 ounces and Lexie explains, “Babies that weigh less than 16 ounces, don’t survive.” Morgan’s boyfriend and the baby’s father Chris believes Ali/Tommy was a mistake and therefore he wants to stop treating the ailing preemie. Chris is rattling off stats from his cell phone (nice product placement) regurgitating the odds that his baby only has a 13 percent chance of survival so why bother trying to save him. (And the father of the year goes to … anyone but Chris!) Morgan wants to keep fighting for Ali/Tommy and tells Chris he doesn’t have to be a part of his life if he doesn’t want to.

Morgan, “I’m offering you an out … I’m saying take the out, Chris. You want it.” Chris takes it and walks out on Morgan and Ali/Tommy.

While Ali/Tommy no longer has a father figure in his life, Derek is holding tightly to Zola. Derek notices people are looking at him strangely whenever he has Zola in tow. He assumes he is suffering from some form of racism and snaps at an onlooker.

Derek, “Do you have a problem? It’s 2012! Want to be shocked by a white man with a black baby? You’re about three decades too late.”

Bailey races over, “I am sorry don’t listen to him.” She then says to Derek, “What is wrong with you? She was not staring at you because daddy is white and his daughter is black. She was staring at you two because daddy has nice hair, maybe perfect hair but for whatever reason his daughter’s hair is 31 flavors of wrong! It’s hard on the eyes! Look, you are white, but your baby is black! Do your baby’s hair!”

Bailey saves the day and we see her at the McDreamys’ house instructing Derek on how to properly stlye Zola’s hair.

What did you think of this week’s episode? Do you think Owen is cheating on Cristina? Should Derek audition for Queen Latifah‘s Beauty Shop 2? How can I get Callie to blow my mind? 

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