TV

The 2012 Golden Globes and Gay Degrees of Separation

If you followed @afterellen’s Golden Globes tweet-along at #showusyourglobes, you know that this year was almost as full of Gay Goodness as last year, even though we expected the awards to straighten up.

But we also expected Ricky Gervais not to be invited back, so what do we know?

Before we proceed with a recap of the festivities, I must put to rest any and all rumors about why I am doing this recap when awards shows are Dorothy Snarker territory. Ms. Snarker, faced with the choice of staying up all night writing about the Golden Globes or staying up all night partying in Vegas with lesbian softball players, chose the latter. I know, I know. But we will get through this together. On with the show.

The Red Carpet show-before-the-show wasted no time in affirming that the acting community’s favorite designers had chosen “show us your globes” as their theme for the evening long before we did. In fact, this may be the first time you notice that Morena Baccarin is the one wearing this dress.

Mila Kunis wore one of the most titillating gowns, proving that “the new face of Dior” is strictly a figure of speech.

Gervais was obviously tickled to be back after last year’s brouhaha over his controversial hosting style. “The Hollywood Foreign Press have warned me that if I insult any of you, or any of them, or offend any viewers or cause controversy whatsoever … they’ll definitely invite me back again next year as well.”

Our favorite bit from the opening alluded to Gervais’ merciless comments about Mel Gibson in last year’s show. Reading from a list of “rules” the HFP gave him for the evening, he said, “I mustn’t mention Mel Gibson this year – not his private life, his politics, his recent films or especially not Jodie Foster‘s Beaver. I haven’t seen it myself. I’ve spoken to a lot of guys – they haven’t seen it either. But that doesn’t mean it’s not good.”

Those gorgeous kids in the background are Jodie’s sons. Lucky boys.

For the most part, though, Gervais kept things fairly tame. I don’t know if we were just ready for anything after last year or he decided to tone things down. But just as last year, the good-humored celebs enjoyed him and the others just enjoyed each other. Well, except for Sir Elton, who enjoyed no one.

The awards themselves provided a good game of Six Degrees of Gay, although most needed much fewer than six connections. See if you can connect the queer dots as we go.

Best supporting actor drama went to Christopher Plummer, who played a gay man in Beginners. Best actress in a TV comedy was Laura Dern for Enlightened, who played the woman that motivated Ellen to come out on her sitcom.

Since Dern’s career suffered for a few years as a result of her appearance on the show, the award is especially sweet to those of us who have been able to live more openly “after Ellen.”

Introducing the best TV comedy actress category provided one of the Globes’ best moments: Tina Fey photobombing Amy Poehler‘s close-up.

No wonder we love these women.

AfterEllen.com favorite Downton Abbey won best TV miniseries, although our favorite ‘ships were nowhere to be seen. I always love seeing Elizabeth McGovern, though. I’ve had a crush on her ever since she played lesbian Moira in The Handmaid’s Tale.

To no one’s surprise, Kate Winslet received best actress in a miniseries for Mildred Pierce, kissing bisexual Evan Rachel Wood on her way to the stage.

One of Mildred Pierce‘s executive producers is out lesbian Christine Vachon. And, of course, Winslet herself is less than one degree from gay, having played a lesbian in Heavenly Creatures.

Best actor in a TV drama went to Kelsey Grammer for Boss. Grammer is best known for playing Dr. Frasier Crane, one of TV’s gayest straight men, along with David Hyde Pierce, who came out as gay in 2007.

My favorite new show of 2011, Homeland, garnered well-deserved awards for best TV drama and best actress in a TV drama for Claire Danes. If you didn’t watch Homeland, I hope this motivates you to catch up.

Danes won the Globe last year for playing lesbian Temple Grandin. She’s also married to the frequently gay-for-pay Hugh Dancy.

The Artist, to no one’s surprise, earned awards for Jean Dujardin as best comedy actor, along with best original score and best motion picture comedy/musical. I admit that the LGBT connection was a little thin – Beth Grant, a member of the Sordid Lives cast, plays a maid in the film. But when the cast took the stage to accept best picture, lead dog Uggie was among them. What is more gay than that?

To Sir Elton John‘s disgust, Madonna took the prize for best original song in a motion picture for “Masterpiece” in W.E.

Madonna also presented an award and was the subject of a jab by Gervais when he introduced her as, “always vogue, a material girl, and just like a virgin.” But Madonna didn’t skip a beat. “If I’m still a virgin, Ricky, then why don’t you come on and do something about it. I haven’t kissed a girl in a few years. On TV.”

Idris Elba of Luther won best actor in a tv movie/miniseries. I’ve never watched the show, but @skgway helped me with the gay connection. Luther co-star Aimee Ffion played Sketch in Skins. And Saskia Reeves, who plays Luther’s boss, played gay in the film Butterfly Kiss.

Best actress in a motion picture goes to Michele Williams for My Week With Marilyn. This is the same award Marilyn herself won more than 50 years ago. Williams thanked her daughter Matilda, “whose bravery and exuberance is the example I take with me in my work and in my life.”

Michelle played a lesbian in If These Walls Could Talk2 and also played Ennis’s wife Alma in Brokeback Mountain. Add the fact that she always brings Busy Phillips to awards shows as her “date” and Williams earns, as @TheWeyrd1 says, “the gay trifecta.”

Sarah Michelle Gellar and Piper Perabo presented best supporting actor TV to Peter Dinklage for Game of Thrones. (Dinklage played gay in the very funny Death at a Funeral). Best animated feature film went to Adventures of Tintin, directed by Stephen Spielberg, who is married to Dr. Arizona Robbins/Jessica Capshaw‘s mom Kate. Best screenplay went to Woody Allen’s Midnight in Paris, in which main character Gil travels to the 1920s and encounters Cole Porter and Gertrude Stein, among others. Imaginary gays totally count.

Just as we were about to doze off, Felicity Huffman and William H. Macy showed us why they need to be onscreen together more often as they sang a duet to introduce the best actress in a TV drama nominations.

Jessica Lange won the award for American Horror, a show too creepy for me to watch, created by one of my current least-favorite gays, Ryan Murphy. To my incredible surprise, Lange has never played a lesbian. What’s up with that? She did, however, star in Normal, in which she played the wife of a transgender MTF.

Around this point in the ceremony, my TV screen flashed so brightly that I thought the Westboro Baptist Church picketers had successfully called lightning down upon the sinners. To my relief, it was simply the near unbearable lightness of Tina Fey and Jane Lynch on stage together.

The wonder-women presented best actor in a TV comedy to Matt LeBlanc for the surprisingly good Episodes, which includes some smart LGBT humor. LeBlanc is best known for Friends, of course, which featured recurring lesbian characters and one of the first lesbian weddings on TV.

Octavia Spencer received best supporting actress in a film drama for The Help, in one of the most cheered awards of the night. Melissa McCarthy wept as Spencer quoted Martin Luther King: “All labor that uplifts humanity has dignity and importance.”

Spencer played Minny Jackson, who is one of the maids interviewed by Emma Stone‘s character Skeeter, whose mom thinks she’s a lesbian.

Martin Scorcese, who once dated Liza Minnelli, won best motion picture director for the delightful Hugo.

Best TV comedy once again went to the totally gay Modern Family – the only network show to win an award. Sofia Vergara took over the acceptance microphone, thanking the Hollywood Foreign Press in Spanish as director Steven Levitan translated. Vergara was slightly tipsy, so chances are the translation wasn’t word for word.

Meryl Streep was completely stunned to win best actress in a motion picture for Iron Lady. So stunned that she forgot to take her glasses on stage and had to thank people from memory. That did not prevent her from being passionate about the other women in the category – as well as the incredible performances in the film Pariah. This was a great year for leading women in the movies.

I know Streep’s win was not universally cheered by critics, but her performance was remarkable – she became Margaret Thatcher. The film itself was not among the best of the year, but that doesn’t take anything away from the acting. I may change my mind when Albert Nobbs comes to my neck of the woods, but I’m quite happy with Streep’s award for the moment.

In perhaps the biggest surprise of the night, The Descendants took best motion picture drama. George Clooney also took best actor in a motion picture drama.

As usual, the best part of the night was following the #showustheglobes tweets (facilitated by @chubbyjones). Here’s a sample.

So what did you think of this year’s Golden Globes? Do you have any other Gay Connections to add? What did you love – and hate about what won? Tell us everything.

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