Gay Girl’s Goggles: “2 Broke Girls” SnapCap (1.05)

When only four percent of scripted TV shows feature LGBT characters, what’s a gay girl to do? Why, strap on your gay goggles and watch TV along with us, of course! Our handy appraisal scale is better than any old letter grade. Other sites A+. We say, “What about our lezzy-lady feelings?”

Max wants to ignore her bills. Caroline wants to avoid her ex-boyfriend. And Han — poor Han just wants to get laid. It’s good to have goals. Also, apparently, a horse. I now expect to see a horde of unemployed recent college graduates inquiring about horse ownership as a way to pay off their student loans. And if that fails, you can always see if Vicki from Small Wonder is available.

AFTERELLEN BAIT

Max and Caroline talk about each other’s nipples — a lot. And they touch their nipples – a lot. I am now starting to wonder why all TV shows aren’t filmed in walk-in freezers. The viewership from male and gay lady watchers would skyrocket. Think about it, TV executives.

FEELINGS, FEELINGS, FEELINGS

Do you know why I like this show – well, besides the fact that it fits in as many dirty jokes and naughty puns into 21 minutes as humanly possible? Because it’s about two girls who despite their Odd Couple tendencies care about one another and are trying to support each other, be it about personal relationships or personal finance. Caroline being concerned about Max not paying her bills – that felt pretty real. And Max giving Caroline the strength to face her douche ex-boyfriend – that felt pretty real, too. In real life, girls do that. It’s not just all cat fights or pillow fights.

BROKEBACK GIRLS

Checking out each others’ nipples? Check. Regaling each other with stories of past lesbian make-outs? Check. Discussing Han jobs, wad slapping and fingering without watercolors? Check, check, checkity check. But even if none of that happened, come on, they rode off into the night together on a horse, people.

FUNNY BUSINESS

So many dirty jokes, so little time. If Caroline wasn’t joking about bisexuals (“Max, everyone keeps telling me they can’t decide. It’s like a support group for bisexuals.”) then Max was examining Caroline’s gumdrops (“You’re smuggling some gumdrops there too, ice queen.”) Though I think my favorite joke of the night was their discussion of their differing sweet 16 birthday parties.

Caroline: I’m really good at party planning, my sweet 16 had a pink and black theme, and Alanis Morrisette sang songs from Jagged Little Pill.

Max: Wow, on my sweet sixteen my mom took a bunch of jagged little pills, and I had to drive her to the hospital to get her stomach pumped.

Caroline: Was your life based on the novel Push by Sapphire?

Also not to be missed this episode: Max fluffing Caroline’s gumdrops so they’ll pop for her richie-rich ex. See what I was saying about always being there for your friends? Still the best sight-gag of the week was of Han the lesbian hipster look-alike. Seriously, who hasn’t made out with this girl – dare or no dare?

So, which jokes has you in stitches this week? And, believe it or not, I’ve finally warmed up to the whole horse idea. You can stay Chestnut, as long as the gals ride off into the sunset (or sunrise) together on you every week.

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