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Gay Girl’s Goggles: “Ringer” SnapCap (1.04)

When only four percent of scripted TV shows feature LGBT characters, what’s a gay girl to do? Why, strap on your gay goggles and watch TV along with us, of course! Our handy appraisal scale is better than any old letter grade. Other sites A+. We say, “What about our lezzy-lady feelings?”

Hey, look, two little Sarah Michelle Gellars. I guess into every generation more than one is born after all. (I know, I know — but I can’t help it when the Buffy jokes are right there.) This week we got more of a glimpse into Bridget and Siobhan’s past. They were close as little girls, even time sharing a heart necklace they switching possession of every birthday. But then things went really wrong because Bridget did a Very Bad Thing. We still don’t know what this Very Bad Thing was, but it made Siobhan never want the necklace back — or to see Bridget.

AFTERELLEN BAIT (What enticement did the episode use to reel in gay lady viewers?)

This could really be the failiest Bechdel Test show I’m watching right now, which is crazy considering how Sarah’s other show (yes, two references in one SnapCap) never once failed in that department. OK, maybe just once during the “Hush” episode, but to be fair, no one talked to anyone then. Still, even two SMGs aren’t enough to make up for the fact that this show needs another lady, and not a best friend who only talks with Fake Siobhan/Real Bridget about how much she thinks her husband is cheating on her. Also, I could have really used a little Jaime Murray in this episode to reassure me given the big emotional end to the season finale of Warehouse 13. Oh, and way to freak us out with scary dream ghost Siobhan. This is Ringer, not The Ring.

FEELINGS, FEELINGS, FEELINGS! (Did the episode give you a lot of feelings?)

OK, so the sharing the necklace thing was pretty sweet. And then Siobhan throwing it at Bridget’s feet was pretty harsh. Showing more of the sisters interacting is smart, because it makes us more emotionally involved — which is what I’ve been harping about since the show started. But while the show is definitely working hard to make us feel sorry for Bridget, it seems to be doing the opposite with Siobhan.

TWISTY TURNY (Exactly how confused are you this episode?)

While we’re still left hanging about the Very Bad Thing Bridget did, we’re getting a sense of the Very Bad Thing Siobhan is planning in her Parisian hideaway. She hasn’t just disappeared; she’s scheming. In fact, she schemed her way right into the bed of some hunky big-time businessman, who ends up paying for her hotel stay because of her drained bank account. Um, doesn’t that kind of make her a prostitute? But wait, she actually targeted the hunky big-time businessman because he works at her husband’s company. And she steals account numbers from his briefcase.

As for Real Bridget/Fake Siobhan, she has her hands full trying to keep the nosy FBI guy with the dramatic eyeliner off her trail, her ex-lover with the unfinished book off her back (and front, ahem), and her best friend with the marital problems off her scent that she is really the cause of said problems. None of it goes that well, especially the BFF part because Gemma goes all dramatic Dynasty slap on Real Bridget/Fake Siobhan when she discovers the truth. And then in a truly bone-headed move, Real Bridget/Fake Siobhan tells Gemma that she’s really Bridget. Yeah, sure, reveal your secret identity to a woman who is super pissed and looking for revenge. Excellent plan. Nothing could go wrong here.

DOUBLE VISION (How clear is the show’s vision, double or otherwise this week?)

Now we know Siobhan has ulterior motives for disappearing, the question become what is her end game? Does she just want to rob her husband? Is she trying to escape something? Or, my dream scenario, is she involved in an illicit tryst with Jaime’s character Olivia and they plan to plunder Andrew’s company and then run away together to a desert island where they’ll live out their days rolling around on the beach and drinking pina coladas from coconut shells? Think about it, writers.

So, happy with the plot thickening? What do you really think Siobhan is up to? And, come on, what businessman in 2011 really carries around a piece of paper in a manila envelope filled with business account numbers?

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