Welcome, all! Welcome back to the crazy world of Creepy McCreeperson, aka Eli. Adam’s role in the storyline this week was extremely small, so we’ll cover that and move on to the developments between Fiona and Holly J.
Essentially, Eli’s still being creepy, and Clare is still creeped out. Adam asks Eli why he isn’t sitting next to Clare, and Eli responds that he’s “giving her space,” a word that Adam didn’t realize was in Eli’s vocabulary.
And it’s not, really. See, the rest of this storyline consisted of Eli getting annoyed with Clare for telling an adult that he’d brought a gun to school, Eli getting annoyed with Clare for cancelling on the road-trip he had planned for them, and Eli calling Clare to tell her he’s annoyed by her actions.
In turn, Clare tells him that she hates his hearse, and she thinks they should break up. Disagreeing, Eli declares that they’re meant to be together, and he’ll get rid of the hearse, Morty, if that’s what it takes. He then hangs up the phone and crashes the car. Somehow this doesn’t strike me as the best way to get the girl.
Thankfully, Clare agrees. After rushing to the hospital to make sure Eli’s okay and finding out that he crashed Morty because he knew she would come running to him, she tells him he’s manipulative and walks away. End story. Eli = creepy, Clare = creeped out and getting out.
On to Fiona! Anya is trying to convince Fiona that she should tell Holly J. about her crush, but Fiona refuses, insisting that it will ruin their friendship. Just then, Holly J. strolls gaily in (can I say that?) to announce that she and Sav are no more. In fact, the weight of the world has been lifted from her shoulders! You know your relationship belongs six feet under when — anyway, she invites both Anya and Fiona to be her dates for the Spring Semi-Formal.
Later, Holly J. mentions to Anya that she thinks Fiona’s acting weird. Anya waves it off but then tries to hint that she believes the sleepover is a bad idea, especially the part where Holly J. “shares a bed with her lesbian best friend.” Why? Well, because Fiona’s in love with her, of course! So much for keeping that a secret, huh?
As Holly J. puts this revelation together with some of Fiona’s recent actions, Anya quickly backtracks to make sure Holly J. won’t tell Fiona she knows about the crush (oh hey, pot – meet the kettle!) and that the only reason she told her in the first place was so Holly J. doesn’t make things awkward for Fiona.
Skip ahead to dress shopping for the dance, where Holly J. doesn’t want Fiona to zip up her dress and then cancels on the sleepover. Wow, Holly J. sucks at not being awkward just as much as Anya sucks at keeping secrets. Good teamwork, ladies.
Fiona heads out to shower, and Anya immediately calls her out on her newfound awkwardness around Fiona. Holly J. bemoans that she’s “just a default love” because Fiona doesn’t know any other lesbians. I think we can see where this might be headed. “Do you think Fi’s into blondes or brunettes?” Holly J. wonders, to which Anya responds: redheads. You walked right into that one, Holly J.
That night at the dance, in what is a decidedly awkward conversation, Holly J. pawns Fiona off to a decidedly not-redheaded girl who runs Degrassi’s LGBT Committee. Anya just looks at Holly J. in disappointment.
“Dance floor buddy system mean anything to you?” Fiona snaps at Holly J. when she finds her again. “You ditched me!” As Anya sneaks off, Holly J. tries to claim that she thought it would be nice for Fiona to meet someone new who could help take her mind off things—like her crush on Holly J.
Fiona calls Holly J. out for using the same “indirect approach” that she had used when trying to break up with Sav, but Holly J. insists that she just didn’t want to send Fiona “the wrong message.” Fiona — who’s learned a thing or two this year about standing up for herself in relationships — retorts, “Right now the only message I’m getting is that I lost my best friend.”
Holly J. eventually finds Fiona to explain that “dropping you as a friend was never my intention.” She was trying to be “sensitive” to Fiona’s “needs” but — by her own admission — was doing it badly. Yeah, ya think?
Fiona tells Holly J. that she knows they’ll never be together, and she just wants Holly J. to get over herself and stop treating Fiona “like a Fabergé egg.” In response, Holly J. offers up her pinkie to show that things will stay the same as they’ve always been between them.
After pinkie-swearing, Fiona quips, “P.S. I’ll get over you. You’re not that awesome.” Holly J. looks just the right amount of offended and amused, and they walk off into the closest to a sunset they’ll probably get. As far as straight-girl crushes on best friends go, this seems like a damn near perfect happily-ever-after.
Watch the full episode at TeenNick.com. ‘Til next time, everyone! Thoughts on Season 10 and hopes for Season 11?