Alison DiLaurentis, Pretty Little Liars
Why Not: Because she is a total rhymes with “itch.” Also, she is dead. I usually find that a major impediment to dating.
Jackie Peyton, Nurse Jackie
Why Not: Because she is drug addict. But I do recommend becoming her friend so you can meet her sexy best friend, Dr. O’Hara.
Tara Thornton, True Blood
Why Not: Because she’s always getting kidnapped, hypnotized or brainwashed. Of course it’s not really her fault, poor dear, but better safe than sorry because that girl is a trouble magnet.
Frankie Alan, Lip Service
Why Not: Because the hipster lesbothario thing is all fun and games until she dumps you faster than you can say “skinny jeans” for the girl from her past who got away.
Shane McCutcheon, The L Word
Why Not: Because this isn’t who you want to sleep with, but settle down with. Say what you will about sexy, sexy Shane, but she no one is going to give her a “World’s Greatest Girlfriend” mug anytime soon. One girlfriend winds up left at the altar. Another winds up falsely blamed for burning down her business. And another winds up dead in the pool. That’s a bad track record, people.
Jenny Schecter, The L Word
Why Not: Because she is Jenny freaking Schecter. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200. Just run.
We boss because we care. What TV characters are on your Should Not Date list?