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This Week in Lesbianish TV: Jan. 27 – Feb. 4

We run a lot of recaps on AfterEllen.com, but we aren’t able to run them on every single show with a lesbian or bisexual female character. It’s a great problem to have, really – too many shows on television with gay women. So we decided to do a weekly column giving you the basics on the lesbianish storylines and highlights from out lesbians who have regular shows on the tube. If we miss anything, we’d love for you to send us a tip.

Being Human (Mondays, SyFY): Emily was MIA this week.

GLEE (Tuesdays, Fox): New episodes return Feb. 6.

Grey’s Anatomy (Thursdays, ABC): Callie gives Arizona a baby ultimatum (be part of the baby’s life or hit the road), but she is paranoid about the baby’s health and won’t leave the exam room. This means that both Arizona and Mark spend the whole episode running back and forth between the OR and Callie’s exam room, checking in on Callie and their fetus. The best moment of the episode is when Callie explains the situation and introduces Arizona and Mark to her new doctor, “Lesbian lover, baby daddy.” Yep, that about sums it up! In the end, Arizona tells Callie to relax and that she’s in for the long haul with “my baby,” then corrects herself and says “our baby.” Arizona = Callie’s baby daddy? We would totally approve that message. Watch full episodes at ABC.com.

Portlandia (Fridays, IFC): On the second episode, Aubrey Plaza (Parks & Recreation) visits Women & Women First in search of some books for her feminist college course. One book she needs: Different Daughters.

Pretty Little Liars (ABC Family, Mondays): Emily returns to the swim team, where she has pissed off Paige, who wants to be swim captain. Paige tells Emily she knows she’s into “the breast stroke,” which doesn’t bother Emily as much as it bothers Spencer. Being a good BFF, Spencer tells the swim coach, who confronts Paige and Emily about the homophobic remark. Even though Emily says it’s not a big deal, Paige later tries to drown her in the pool and leaves her with a threat. Watch the full episode at ABCFamily.com.

Private Practice (Thursdays, ABC): Addison threw a Big Lesbian Wedding for her mom and mom’s lover – and discovered that her own acceptance of LGBT people didn’t quite extend to her mom. Check back for our recap on Monday. Watch full episodes at ABC.com.

Rules of Engagement (CBS, Mondays): No Brenda this week, and no word on when she’ll be back as of yet.

Skins (MTV, Mondays): This week, Tony tries to get Tea to talk to him at a party, but she’s ignoring him. But Tea has to follow through on her bet, and ends up showing her boobs to Tony and the other boys because Stanley finally lost his v-card. Watch full episodes at MTV.com.

Spartacus: Gods of the Arena (Starz, Fridays): Here’s what you need to know: Lucretia invites Gaia to join her in bed again – but this time, her husband is involved. This is after the women had a discussion of what happened, and Gaia said she enjoyed herself and wouldn’t turn the other opportunity down should it arise again, as it did.

The Good Wife (CBS, Tuesdays): The best line in the whole episode was spoken by a lawyer from the States Attorney about Kalinda: “Whenever I see that bitch, I know we’re in trouble.” And she’s right. Now Kalinda has not only Blake looking into her personal life, but the States Attorney, where she thinks she has an ally in Cary Agos. So far, it seems Cary is working with his boss to go against Kalinda, but he sure seems unhappy about it. Watch full episodes at CBS.com.

White Collar (USA, Wednesdays): This week, Diana poses (literally) as a runway model to get the attention of Collins, a man Peter and Neal are trying to bring down. As he makes himself known, Peter and Neal descend on him, but he pulls a gun. Diana arrives in time to arrest Collins for attempting to murder Neal, who she refers to as an FBI agent. After they put him away, she shows Peter and Neal some footage of a video Christopher sent them, where he tries to lead them to his girlfriend, Maggie. Watch full episodes at USANetwork.com.

Brooklyn Kinda Love (Playboy TV, Saturdays): No Bek and Erin this week. Guess they’re too much in love compared to the other couples, who fight like crazy.

Tabatha’s Salon Takeover (Bravo, Mondays): Tabatha attempts to help bQuite in Palmdale, Calif. by making over their look and helping the workers to bond. BTW, their team-bonding is done in the desert.

Worst Cooks in America (Food Network, Sundays): Out lesbian contestant Georgann joins her team in having to work on a meal unsupervised. Later, they are in charge of an hors d’oeuvre party for NFL star Kris Jenkins 30 guests. Georgann competes well and stays on another week.

The Ellen DeGeneres Show (WB): Glee star Darren Criss serenaded Ellen this week, and she loved it. They also talked about Darren’s character on the show, which she praised for being a confident gay teen. Ellen also got involved with some comedic drama with The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills this week, and scared the crap out of Jennifer Aniston.

The Rachel Maddow Show ( MSNBC): Rachel covered the happenings in Egypt this week in detail, but she also took some time to remember David Kato for his LGBT advocacy work in Uganda, before he was murdered. Watch full episodes at MSNBC.com.

The Suze Orman Show (Fridays, CNBC): A caller wants to spend a lot of dough on two different hockey games in Calgary, an 11-year-old asks if he can spend $28 on some cool spy glasses and a woman stages an intervention for her over-spending best friend. Watch video clips at CNBC.com.

The Talk (CBS): Sara shared some photos from when she gave birth that featured her partner Ali. The hosts were discussing having cameras in the delivery room, and Sara said she was all for it. Marlee Matlin visited the show the same day, and talked about her childhood and how she got her new gigs on CSI and The Apprentice. Watch full episodes at CBS.com.

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