Rafaela and Mercedes
Julia/Mariana (and Armando)
Well, it went something like that, anyway. It is rumored that this goddess failed out of the Derek Zoolander School for Kids Who Can’t Read Good (And Want To Learn How To Do Other Things Good Too). But no one likes to talk about that.
What I’m trying to say is that Armando is back.
You know on Friends when Rachel finds Joey’s copy of The Shining in the freezer and Joey tells her that it got too scary so he had to put it in the freezer? Well, I am writing this recap from the freezer. And brr, it’s cold in here (there must be some toros in the atmosphere).
So where were we?
Okay, so Julia and Mariana have sex, which means that somewhere in Spain lightning lit up the sky and Armando’s lesbian virgin-alarm (designed to go off before Julia does) beeped violently, forcing him to jump into the nearest teleportation device and return to Mexico.
When episode 46 kicks off, we’re in the middle of an earthquake, which none of the Aparicio sisters notice because they’re busy creating earthquakes of their own. And by creating earthquakes I mean having sex.
The next morning at breakfast, Ileana greets them with, “Did you feel that earthquake?!” And Alma and Mercedes are like, “And by ‘earthquake’ you mean…?”