RachelWatch: Rachel Goes to CPAC

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Today: Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius, an update on the Joseph Stack case, and some amazing CPAC swag.

I Can CPAC Clearly Now

Rachel braved the Conservative Political Action Conference and came back bearing news. And swag. But first the news.

CPAC seems to be a festival of cognitive dissonance, the most egregious example being Dick Cheney’s entrance to rockin’ guitar music. This fools no one, conservatives! Just have him enter to Toccata and Fugue in D Minor like always.

Rachel seemed less concerned with the rending of the very fabric of what “rock” means than with factual errors. She noticed — Whoopsie! — just a few in some of the speeches.

Special treat: A little bonus bluster from former Republican Congressman Dick “Rachel Got Me Fired” Armey.

Suicide Pilot

Rachel and Andrea Mitchell of NBC News fleshed out the story of Joseph Stack, the man who crashed a plane into a building that housed the IRS offices in Austin, TX.

Mitchell stated rather firmly that it was a criminal act rather than terrorism, and I’m not entirely ready to buy what she’s selling. I think an argument can be made either way this early on — why was she so adamant?

Rachel was quick to jump in with a better point: Stack had as much leftist rambling in his suicide note as right-wing stuff. Which means the attempts to shove him into a political category to prove which side is the most awful are incorrect as well as being inappropriate.

As for the creepwads who immediately set up Facebook fan pages for Stack? Shove away.

[Later in the show, Rachel clarified that there was not, in fact, a bomb in Stack’s car.]

Here They Goliath Again

As you may have noticed, several major health care companies seem to be having a secret contest to see who can get away with being the most hilariously over-the-top evil before someone actually experiences consequences.

Anthem Blue Cross made a bold move with a planned (and since postponed) 39% rate hike in California in the middle of booming profits, which means CIGNA had no choice but to raise rates while cackling and twirling their moustaches.

Aetna doesn’t yet have the power to actually evict widows and orphans while raising their insurance premiums, but a spokesperson said they’re working on some “exciting new plans.”

And UnitedHealth Group, Inc. seemed to have fallen way behind until a top executive unveiled the shark tank yesterday morning.

Rachel welcomed Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius, who seems satisfyingly ready to start busting some heads.

I like Sebelius, but I was glad Rachel stuck to her guns and didn’t let her sidestep the issue of the public option.

The Filibuster Challenge

Rachel and her hard-dialing interns are getting ever-closer to real answers on who in the Senate supports filibuster reform and the contest to give the problem a name people will actually notice is coming down to the wire.

Rachel promised a winner on tonight’s show, which will be airing at the special weird times of 7, 9, and 11 p.m. Eastern. OK, two of those times aren’t weird. But if you want to see the first show, you’ll need to be on your toes.

Just This Once, Rachel Wants To Be Treated Like a Doormat

Rachel showed us her adventures at CPAC and did a quick inventory of the amazing swag she picked up.

Get ready to take in 100% of your recommended daily allowance of awesome in just one serving.

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