Beyoncé breaks a record and Gaga gays it up at 2010 Grammys

Before we begin the recap of the Grammys, I’d like to take this opportunity to say that Beyoncé had one of the best albums of all time! Oh wait — Kanye didn’t storm the stage and whine when Taylor Swift had an upset victory for Album of the Year with Fearless? Shocking. Nevermind then.

The gays set the tone of the 2010 Grammys last night, when Lady Gaga, after being dumped into an incinerator for her “mind-controlling” performance of “Poker Face,” reemerged with the most fabulous pop princess of them all, Sir Elton John, for a duet so bedazzled and flamboyant, it brought Saturday drag nights to the center stage. Their pianos were conjoined, their faces were smudged with charcoal, and I nearly peed myself as they sang “Speechless” and “Your Song.” Perhaps her vast popularity with the gays extended to the Grammy nominating committee and scored her the first two awards of her career.

Stephen Colbert continued the gay(ish)ness when he told his teenage daughter in the audience to have a good night, but “stay away from Katy Perry.” Seriously, though, I don’t think her obnoxious fiancé Russell Brand would mind it.

Beyoncé assumed total domination of the Grammys as she first seamlessly belted her way through “If I Were a Boy” to the angsty “You Oughta Know” by Alanis Morissette before taking home six Grammys — breaking the record for most Grammys any female artist has won in a single night — including Song of the Year for “Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It)” and Best Female Pop Vocal Performance for “Halo.”

The ever-stunning P!nk performed what now appears to be her trademark of daredevil acrobatics as she sang “Glitter in the Air,” disrobed, and spun high above the audience on a swing, drenched in water. If the whole singing thing doesn’t work, P!nk should definitely join the circus.

Though I was annoyed that Taylor Swift of all people got to join the Stevie Nicks onstage, the former Fleetwood Mac frontrunner rocked the stage to “Rhiannon,” despite Swift’s off-key contributions. For real, though, Swift sounded horrible on such an epic classic. Whatever, Beyoncé had one of the best albums of all-time.

Despite seeming like it was a giant plug for Avatar, the 3-D “Earth Song” tribute to Michael Jackson was beautiful: Celine Dion, Usher, Carrie Underwood, Jennifer Hudson and Smokey Robinson on one stage is pretty damn sexy.

Other highlights of the night were a shout-out to the iPad, a futuristic performance by the Black Eyed Peas, Mary J. Blige and Andrea Bocelli’s Haiti fundraiser duet of “Bridge Over Troubled Water,” and MJ’s children, Paris and Prince Michael, accepting the Lifetime Achievement Award on their father’s behalf.

Also, out lesbian Sharon Isbin won Best Instrumental Soloist Performance (Without Orchestra) for her album Journey To The New World. Congrats!

What was your favorite moment/artist/beautiful woman of the night?

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