Lez Dish It Out! AfterEllen’s Weekly Round-Up

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Photo: Disney, Instagram

Photo: Disney, Instagram

Happy Friday, ladies! Although America might be on the brink of a nuclear war, lady lovin’ news is still going strong. This week in lez news, New Yorkers got word that Cynthia Nixon might run for New York governor, a Disney cartoon featured lesbian moms, and Amber Heard and Elon Musk called it quits. Lez get to it!

Gif: Tumblr

Amber Heard & Elon Musk Split

Photo: Amber Heard/Instagram

Photo: Amber Heard/Instagram

Well, this didn’t last long.

About five months after Heard announced her relationship with Elon on Instagram, the couple decided to call it quits on Tuesday. Although the bisexual actress tends to keep her private life private, she confirmed the split to fans.

Check out Amber’s breakup message below:

As for Elon, he wrote, according to the CNN:

Btw, just to clear up some of the press storm this weekend, although Amber and I did break up, we are still friends, remain close and love one another. Long distance relationships when both partners have intense work obligations are always difficult, but who knows what the future holds.”

Obviously, Musk’s explanation makes the most sense here. Heard is busy filming Aquaman in Australia, and long distance relationships are hard. In my dramatic mind, however, I’m imagining a reconciliation between Amber and her ex Tasya van Ree. The two were spotted hanging out just last month, so you never know…

P.S. Shoutout to the Los Angeles Times for the corniest Amber/Elon breakup headline: “Amber Heard and Elon Musk’s relationship has run out of fuel.” Musk is the CEO of Tesla, in case you weren’t aware already.

Ellen DeGeneres Releases A New Line… For CATS

Photo: Ellen DeGeneres/Instagram

Photo: Ellen DeGeneres/Instagram

OK, as much as I like Ellen, she needs to cool it with these lifestyle collections.

Just a week after I told you about the lesbian’s lifestyle collection for babies, she announced the launch of her cat line. To be honest, I’m a bit surprised DeGeneres hadn’t already tackled the cat market – lesbians and cats, am I right? In an interview with AOL, the comic revealed why she decided to get into the cat market (is that even a thing?) and revealed her favorite products from the line. Oh, and you can buy the products on PetSmart.

On why she decided to make a line for cats: “Because I have very nice furniture that I didn’t want them to scratch, and launching my own line of toys and scratchers made more sense to me than buying new furniture.”

On her favorite toys from the collection: “I love all of the toys. Give me a ball on a string and I’ll see you in a week or two when I’m done playing with it.”

Here are some cute photos of the products:

Photo: Petsmart/Ellen DeGeneres

Photo: Petsmart/Ellen DeGeneres

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Screen Shot 2017-08-10 at 7.28.44 PM

Full disclosure: I used to hate cats before I met my former roommate’s cat, Oscar Wilde:

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Photo: Gillian Walters

As you might be able to tell from the picture, Oscar Wilde is a total character, and I can’t wait to buy him some of these toys. My new goal in life is to be the ultimate cat aunt. You can buy items from the line HERE.

Moving on to more Ellen news, she recently spoke to Good Housekeeping about her marriage to Portia de Rossi. It turns out the pair’s NINTH anniversary will be on Aug. 16. Time flies!

The celesbian said:

Portia understands me completely. In our vows, she recited a quote, ‘It is good to be loved. It is profound to be understood’ — and to me, that’s everything. What ‘I love you’ really means is ‘I understand you,’ and she loves me for everything that I am. She supports me and makes me happy.”

Well, hopefully Ellen’s gushing quotes about Portia quiets the couple’s haters. These two have had to endure numerous divorce rumors throughout the years, and it’s just petty at this point. Here’s to many more years of happiness for DeGeneres and de Rossi.

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