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“Bad Girls” Recaps: Episode 1.6 “A Big Mistake”

THIS WEEK’S RAP SHEET:

The confessor: Dominic just can’t keep a secret.

The catastrophe: A new inmate shows up and rocks Denny’s world.

The coquette: Helen flirts with Nikki at every opportunity.

Lovely Larkhall Ooh, look at that. That’s kind of a pretty prison, isn’t it? I mean, as places of incarceration go. If I were an inmate there, I’d send postcards home that said, “Look at my castle!”

A truck (er, lorry) is trundling through the gate. It’s delivering women. Inside, Shell and Zandra watch the newbies arrive. Shell says, “Let’s hope we get some gear off this lot.” Isn’t it nice that she and Zandra have found some common ground? Addiction makes for strong bonds.

One of the new inmates looks like she knows a thing or two about addiction. She’s shaking and bleeding and just looks generally messed up. She peers up at the prison and shakes some more.

The officers’ lounge – Fenner asks whether anyone has seen Helen yet today; she’s been on holiday. He hopes she’s decided to change careers. “If only,” says Sylvia.

Speaking of changing careers, Dominic is still considering quitting the prison service. Sylvia says it’s probably for the best, if he feels he can’t hack it.

Dominic: It’s got bugger all to do with hacking it.

Ooh! Dominic, you’re cute when you’re angry. And at pretty much every other moment of the day.

Dominic accuses Sylvia of not caring (or not “giving a toss,” which is really much more evocative) whether the prisoners live or die. Jim tells him Rachel’s death wasn’t anyone’s fault.

Dominic: Oh, so we’re all happy just as long as the money goes into the bank on time?

Hmm. I really hope nobody’s doing this for the money. There have got to be better ways to pay for your morning cuppa.

Dominic leaves. Sylvia says, “Get Mr. Conscience there.” Yeah, actually, you might want to look into getting a conscience, Bodybag. It’s kind of a nice thing to have.

Sunny day — Nikki is out in the yard (or whatever it’s called), enjoying the sun on her face. Sunshine on my Nikki looks so lovely. But no sun is brighter than the look on Nikki’s face when Helen arrives.

Helen: Hiya, Nikki.

Nikki: Miss Stewart!

Helen: How are you?

Nikki: Surviving. How was your holiday?

Helen: Oh, I don’t know that I would call it a holiday, exactly. Three weeks struggling with the instructions to flat-packed furniture!

Nikki: No man around to help you?

Helen: Call yourself a feminist?

Nikki: [smiling coyly]

Helen: Sean’s up to his eyes in work at the moment.

Nikki: Oh.

Helen: The longer we’re together, the less time we seem to spend with each other. Mind you, I did catch up with a bit of reading. Have you read Sophie’s World?

Nikki: No. No, I haven’t.

Helen: Well, I’ve got a copy at home. I’ll bring it in.

Nikki: Isn’t that against regulations?

Helen: Well, I won’t tell if you won’t.

I don’t even know where to begin. First, I know I said Nikki was happy to see Helen, but the reverse is definitely true too. Helen is doing that little tongue-tucked-behind-her-teeth smile again.

And they’re generally giddy and nervous and grinning a lot, the way you do when you’re falling in love. Or, I mean, the way you do when you’re an inmate and a prisoner in a purely appropriate, prison-like relationship. You know. But really, Helen, did you have to mention Sean? You should try to read the little looks Nikki’s giving you. Actually, I suppose that’s exactly why you mentioned Sean — because you are reading Nikki loud and clear.

And the last two lines of their exchange are just delicious. Nikki’s voice gets all throaty and deep, and Helen is as flirty as can be.

It’s so nice to feel like I’m not making things up for a change (like I usually do when I watch TV). There really is something going on here!

The officers’ lounge — Jim and Sylvia are grudgingly polite through clenched teeth when Helen arrives. Nothing new there. They tell Helen that everything’s been running smoothly in her absence.

Helen starts rifling through the filing cabinet (apparently this is a combination lounge and office), so Sylvia asks if she needs help.

Helen: I’m looking for Nikki Wade’s file.

Fenner: Any particular reason?

Helen: I want to review her sentence plan.

Clearly I’m not up on British lingo. I had no idea “I want to review her sentence plan” was code for “I want to make her mine and build my life around her.”

Jim and Sylvia say there’s nothing to review. So Helen changes the subject and asks for the reports for the last three weeks.

Jim: I’ll get them to you by Friday.

Helen: Today’ll be fine.

Hee! Fenner looks properly scolded.

Meeting Jessie — Dominic is talking to the new inmate who’s shaking and delusional. Her name is Jessie Devlin. Dominic is very gentle with her. Jim, on the other hand, swoops in and says Jessie looks like she’s been “dug up.” Lorna seems to find this funny. I don’t like you anymore, Lorna.

Dominic takes Jessie to some sort of holding cell. As they walk down the hall, other women hiss through the slots in their cell doors. It’s almost like that scene in The Silence of the Lambs where Clarice walks by all the crazy killers. Except, well, this scene probably cost about 1/100th as much to film.

Jessie doesn’t want to be on her own, not without a drink. Dominic says he can’t help her, so she attacks him. She eventually collapses, so they put her on a horrible mattress that’s fermenting on the floor. Dominic tells Jessie the cell is the best place for her, and she promptly pukes on him. Jeez, Dominic, no wonder you want to quit.

Asking for help — Zandra asks Lorna to help her contact Robin, her ex. Zandra can’t even get through to his parents. Lorna just tells her to put Robin out of her mind. But Lorna looks like she herself has quite a lot on her mind whenever Zandra is around.

The ones who care — Helen and Dominic are chatting about Jessie Devlin. Dominic says Jessie has a history of alcoholism and manic depression and needs better care. Helen says at least Larkhall is something.

Dominic: No, it’s nothing. Look: You might be helping. All I’m doing is mopping up the mess.

Helen starts to try to reassure him, but she has an appointment. She suggests they go to the pub sometime.

Dominic: What are you gonna do? Ply me with alcohol, get me to change my mind?

Helen: I hadn’t had you marked down for that cheap.

Here’s something, Helen: I’m even cheaper. All you have to do is speak the word “pub” — or any other word that strikes your fancy — and I’ll be drunk on your accent.

Dominic agrees to meet Helen at the pub on Friday. Who wouldn’t?

Facing her demons — Jessie is having DTs. She’s shrieking and seeing faces in the wall and hearing voices, and she has wet herself. This show is one big public service announcement for the dangers of all kinds of substance abuse.

Reviewing her sentence plan — Helen and Nikki are meeting in their favorite little romantic spot, otherwise known as Helen’s office.

Helen: You used to run your own business. What did that entail?

Nikki: [shrugging] Hiring. Firing.

Helen: And what do you do to keep busy now?

Nikki: Gym. Gardening. Usual stuff. You know.

Helen: Are you not interested in education classes?

Nikki: Well, there are only so many macramé plant hangers you need in one lifetime.

Helen: I’m talking about the Open University.

Nikki: Look. In 10 years’ time, I’ll be a 43-year-old ex-con with a general studies degree. Companies’ll be crying out for them, won’t they?

Helen: I’d like you to think about it. Please? As a favor to me?

Nikki: OK. For you.

I’m going to dissolve into a puddle of goo. Why is this so sweet? Is it because it’s in such direct contrast to the horrors of prison life? Or is it because these two actors really know how to play smitten? Probably both. All I know is that Helen is openly flirting with Nikki, Nikki is openly flirting right back and I’m openly gaping at the screen.

When Nikki says, “For you,” it’s almost like she’s just offered up her wedding vows. She’s taking this pretty seriously, Helen. Don’t toy with her, even if she is inexplicably wearing flip-flops!

Back to reality — Dominic is moving Jessie up to G-Wing. He tells her she looks a lot better than she did last week. Last week?! Come on, you can’t deprive me of a week’s worth of Nikki and Helen smiling and flirting! That’s a punishment more cruel than anything these inmates will ever face.

Dominic escorts Jessie to the meal queue. Shell asks her what she wants, and when Jessie doesn’t reply, Shell smacks her in the face with the serving spoon. Ow. I think DTs are probably preferable to the company of Shell.

Shell’s shenanigans don’t stop, even when Dominic tells her to behave. The minute he turns his back, Shell spits on Jessie’s fish and chips.

Denny shows up, claiming she’s starving, but soon loses her appetite. When she sees Jessie, she stops cold.

After the noticeable commercial gap (which is built into the show because that’s how the Brits do these things), Shell sits down at Denny’s table and makes some snide remarks about Jessie, who’s having trouble grasping her utensils. Bodybag sees it as a prime opportunity to play Taunt the Inmate: “Pick it up like a good girl.” Jessie tries, but ends up on the floor.

Helen swoops in out of nowhere and says, “What’s the joke?” Then she asks Sylvia to help her get Jessie back into her chair. Bodybag acts like she’s just been asked to open her own vein for a blood donation.

Sylvia: What, with my back?

Helen: Look, if your back’s that bad, you shouldn’t be here.

Right on. Also, Sylvia, I’ve discovered that if I transpose two letters in your name — Syliva — it looks like another word for spittle.

Helen tells Sylvia to get Jessie a cup of tea. Nikki watches the whole thing and enjoys it greatly. She and Helen exchange surreptitious grins. Denny smiles too, rather mysteriously.

The four-bed dorm — Denny and Shell are playing cards. Zandra and Shell are still trying to figure out how to get some drugs. Shell says the new girl (Jessie) seems “as high as a bleedin’ kite,” but Denny says Jessie is a nutcase, not a junkie.

Denny: Just leave her alone, all right?

Zandra: [as Denny walks out into the hall] Ooh. Who slapped her tits?

Snort. Zandra, you crack me up. But your hair is just crazy today.

Shell watches Denny go and actually looks concerned. I guess it’s possible to be evil and still have a soul.

The pub — Helen and Dominic are getting that drink they talked about. Dominic is kind of startled by the sight of casual Helen.

Helen: What? It’s a pint. I’m off duty.

And you’re a beauty.

Dominic says it’s weird to be having a drink with the boss. Helen puts him at ease, though — by flirting with him just as sweetly as she flirts with Nikki. Maybe a little more sweetly, unfortunately.

She asks Dominic why he became a prison officer. He pretends it was for the security and the money, but then ‘fesses up: He thought he could make a difference. She tells him he still can, but he just doesn’t think so. Helen says they need officers like him.

Helen: You show the women respect and integrity. Unlike some I could mention. [pauses as she raises her glass] Forget I said that.

I think he’ll probably forget everything you’ve said, if he’s as hypnotized by your stunning face as I am. And you’re showing us your tongue again! Stop that!

Crossing the wrong path — Shell’s sashaying past Jessie’s cell. Jessie steps out at just the wrong time and spills tea (or something liquid, anyway) on Shell. So of course the villainous vixen threatens her and then proceeds to make good on the threat — until Denny pops up out of nowhere.

Denny: Shell, just leave it, yeah?

Shell: Look what she done to my top.

Denny: Wash it. Come on, let’s go.

Shell doesn’t understand why Denny is defending the “old alkie.” I don’t either, but I suspect we’ll find out. Jessie just cries in her cell.

Still at the pub — Helen is getting a bit tipsy. Tipsy looks good on her; she’s literally letting her hair down a bit. Not to mention showing some cleavage.

She says she’s going to rip up Dominic’s resignation letter on Monday. He feels guilty about the show of faith, so he starts to tell Helen what’s been weighing on his conscience. But before he can confess, the bell rings: It’s last call. Helen says, “Right — back to my flat.” Dominic’s not sure, but Helen says she needs the company because Sean’s off on business somewhere.

Don’t look so excited, Dominic. I mean, I would be thrilled too, but you’re just making me jealous.

A sleepless night — Zandra can’t sleep. She’s worried about the baby she’s carrying. Denny can’t sleep either, but she won’t get more specific than “what a s— life I’ve had.”

I’m pretty sure that’s true of everyone there, Denny. It’s sort of a chicken-and-egg thing.

Helen’s flat — Why, oh why, is Dominic there rather than Nikki? It’s just wrong.

Dom and Helen drink wine. How many pints did they have at the pub? I think Helen could drink me under the table. And once I was down there, well, who knows what would happen?

Dominic finally comes clean about Zandra’s temporary escape (you know, when he and Lorna took Zandra to the clinic for the abortion that didn’t happen). He even says it was his idea to keep it quiet and that Lorna wanted to report it, which is the exact opposite of the truth. Helen is gobsmacked.

Helen: How could you have been such an arse?

It’s really embarrassing how much I just giggled at that line.

Helen tells Dominic he could be “sacked on the spot” for the whole thing. He says he knows that and adds that he doesn’t want to keep on lying — “especially to you.” Uh-oh. You’re making everyone fall in love with you today, Helen.

There will have to be a report to the Governing Governor, but Helen still wants Dominic to stay. She says she’ll put in a good word for him and Lorna, but it won’t be easy.

Helen: Still, I have been known for my persuasive powers.

That is like porn for the ears.

Sean arrives home. He and Dominic shake hands. Dominic nods to himself as if he’s thinking, “Yep, she really does have a boyfriend.” I know how you feel, Dom.

Back in black — In the officers’ lounge Monday morning, Dominic announces that he’s decided to stay. After everyone disperses, Lorna asks Dominic what changed his mind. He tells her about the drink with Helen. Lorna teases him. Don’t encourage him, Lorna!

Helen shows up and is rather frosty to Lorna, without explaining why. After Lorna leaves, Dominic asks Helen to keep his confession from Lorna a little longer, at least until she’s talked to the boss.

Helen: And then I’m gonna call you both in for the biggest bollocking of your lives.

She’s so scary. And sexy when she’s scary, especially in that suit she’s wearing today.

Friendly advice — Denny has a confab with Jessie. She tells her to keep her wits about her. Jessie is grateful but not sure why Denny is being so nice to her.

Elsewhere, Zandra’s disappointed that there’s no mail for her. She pulls Lorna aside and asks her to take a letter to Robin, who’s in rehab “just down the road.” She threatens to go see the governor if Lorna doesn’t help her out.

Lorna, you seem to think you’re tough enough to handle this. But anytime you’re within five feet of Zandra, you break into a sweat of Fennerian proportions. Zandra, on the other hand, looks pretty pleased with herself.

Doing as she’s told — Lorna tries to give Robin the letter, but he doesn’t want it. Lorna tells him Zandra didn’t go through with the abortion. How many ethics violations have you just committed, Lorna?

A conversation — Denny stops by Jessie’s cell. Hey, Denny: nice tank top.

She asks Jessie how it’s going; Jessie says she has 13 days left. Denny has thousands. They chat about what they’re in for, where they’re from — you know, small talk.

Denny says it must be tough on Jessie’s family. Jessie says she never had any kids, “Thank Christ.” Denny just gets up and leaves.

Um, Jessie, I guess your mind really must be pickled in alcohol right now if you’re not able to see what Denny’s trying to tell you. Do you think she — the one with the barbed wire tattoo on her neck — is just in the habit of welcoming new inmates?

Jessie does look a little confused as Denny leaves.

Feeding time — Zandra corners Lorna and asks what happened with Robin. Lorna says it was just a waste of time: “Do yourself a favor, love, and put him out of your mind, yeah?”

Zandra’s face says no.

Meanwhile, Denny’s not touching her food. Shell sits down next to her and teases her about Jessie: “I was beginning to think you fancied her.” Then she says maybe it’s the other way around, because Jessie is smiling at Denny from across the room. So Denny struts over to Jessie, grabs her by the throat and pushes her to the ground.

Denny: [gesturing to her own face] Take a good look at this. Don’t it look familiar?

Dominic and Sylvia pull Denny off Jessie. Next thing you know, Denny and Jessie are in Helen’s office. Denny doesn’t offer any explanation at first, but loses it when Jessie says she wants Denny kept away from her.

Denny: You think I’d come anywhere near you, after what you did to me?

Jessie: I never done nothing to ya.

Denny: You bloody did!

Jessie: What?! What have I done?

Helen: Is there something that you’re not telling us?

Denny: She’s my bleeding mother. All right?

Whoa. Aw, Denny. I still feel some weird sort of fondness for you.

Later, back in the dining hall — Um, is that what you call it in a prison? A dining hall? Anyway, Shell is giving a speech about motherhood:

Shell: Imagine having a mother who couldn’t give a s— about ya. Like Denny here. Denny’s mum put her daughter over to the social. ‘Cause she couldn’t put the bottle down. Isn’t that right, Den? Rather have the vodka any time. What age was you when your foster father started raping you, Den? Eleven, was it?

Denny: Leave it, Shell.

Shell: Had to have an abortion at 13. The only place Denny liked was her last children’s home. Then they told her they were shipping her out. Is it any wonder she torched it and ended up in Durham?

Oh, I didn’t know Denny was an arsonist. I know it’s wrong, but I have more respect for her now than I did when I thought she was just a petty crook.

Shell goes over to Jessie and outs her as Denny’s mum. Zandra spits at Jessie, and everyone stares. Shell kisses the top of Denny’s head. Shell, I still don’t know why your evil heart is so soft where Denny’s concerned, but I guess I’m glad you still have some humanity in there somewhere.

Recreation time — Nikki finds Jessie and tries to console her. Jessie explains that she really thought Denny would stand a better chance without her. Nikki tells her to talk to Denny, or to at least write it all down.

Nikki, you’re looking rather fetching today, but wow, do you wear a lot of makeup. I guess you have plenty of time to paint your face in prison.

Special delivery — Jessie gives Denny an envelope.

Jessie: I put some things down. It might fill in a few gaps.

Denny: Yeah? You reckon you can put all I need to know on a bit of paper?

Well, no, she’s just following Nikki’s orders. It’s hard to resist those soulful eyes.

Jessie begs Denny to read the letter. Trouble is, Denny can’t read.

Another special delivery — Helen has brought Nikki the prospectus for the “education classes.” She recommends the English course.

Nikki: Do you really think I can do this?

Helen: Of course! What’s stopping you?

Nikki: I’m scared.

Helen: Well, I never thought I’d hear you say that.

Helen encourages Nikki to at least give it a read. She starts to leave, but then stops and turns back around — she has also brought that book she promised Nikki.

Helen: You thought I’d forget, didn’t you?

Helen looks so proud of herself, not to mention pleased with this little secret they’re sharing. Nikki just looks pleased, period. Um, I mean “full stop.”

Nikki watches Helen go, and with each step Helen takes, falls a little more in love her. I might be projecting a little.

A reading — Zandra is reading Jessie’s letter to Denny. Jessie had a rough childhood, too, and drank to escape it — and later drank to escape her rotten husbands. The letter ends with: “I know you must hate me. You have every right to. They should have a bigger word for it. And I’m sorry.”

Denny sobs, and Zandra holds her. Sniffle.

The next morning — Zandra asks Lorna to help her get some drugs. She figures Lorna’s mother probably has some “Valium or something” and wouldn’t miss a few. Lorna tries to say no, but Zandra reminds her why she has to do everything Zandra asks. Lorna, Lorna, Lorna. Your name is fun to say!

As this conversation is going on, Shell is eavesdropping around the corner. She tiptoes away — not very quietly, but apparently quietly enough.

Elsewhere, Denny gives Jessie the faintest of smiles, and Jessie returns it. I’m such a sap: I’m so happy for both of them!

Lorna’s locker — There’s a note in Lorna’s locker. It says, “Remember my prescription.” Somebody told me to pay attention to the pictures in Lorna’s locker, so let’s look:

I see a kitten, a shark, a tiger and … a bunny up at the top, I think? And there’s a woman with considerable cleavage and nice legs. The cleavage and the legs may be two separate pictures; I can’t quite make it out. But I’d say this assortment of photos tells me nothing about Lorna’s sexuality. It does tell me that she’s kind of weird.

Family dinner — Jessie and Denny are eating and talking. Jessie says maybe she could visit occasionally after she gets out.

Jessie: Do you want me to?

Denny: I ain’t never had a visitor.

Wah! That is too sad. Fix it, Jessie.

Generosity — Zandra’s kid is kicking up a storm. Denny gives Zandra a jelly (a tranquilizer) and doesn’t even ask for anything in exchange. She tells Zandra about a girl in the children’s home whose dad reclaimed her at one point.

Denny: I thought that was how it would happen. Bit of a shock to meet my mum in here, looking like a burst bag of s—.

Zandra tells Denny not to count on her mum’s promise to visit. These two seem to be such good friends now; I guess Zan has fully forgiven Den for the de-crutching. Now that’s generous.

Plotting — Denny asks Jessie whether she meant it when she said she would visit. And then Denny says she doesn’t have to: Denny’s going with her. Oh, boy. Den, you’re just not very smart sometimes.

The library — Nikki is reading Shakespeare. Helen shows up to return a thick, serious-looking tome. She peeks over Nikki’s shoulder.

Helen: Romeo and Juliet. I’m impressed.

Nikki: Juliet and Juliet would be more my cup of tea.

This piques Helen’s curiosity (as if it weren’t already piqued to the point of perkiness), so she follows Nikki to a quieter corner.

Helen: Have you never been interested in men?

Nikki: Not my flavor, no.

Helen: But I thought …

Nikki: What? I just hadn’t met the right one? Nah, they do nothing for me.

Helen: How can you be sure?

Nikki: Same way as you are. If you are.

Helen: I’m not interested in women. Not in that way.

Nikki: Well, you should give it a go sometime. You don’t know what you’re missing.

She hands Helen a copy of Jeanette Winterson’s Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit and leaves. Helen looks at the book quizzically and puts it back on the shelf. She’s a little unsettled but is obviously dedicated to maintaining her unflappable demeanor.

I love this flirtation-through-books thing. It’s like they’re starring in their own romance novel. They’re certainly exchanging enough smoldering looks for that. And Nikki, you’re so cheeky! “If you are.” Nice.

Still plotting — Denny is reviewing her escape plan: She’s going to dress up as a guard. Jessie’s not sure it’s going to work. Rather, she’s sure it’s not going to work.

Denny: You’ll have your exit papers and I’ll be escorting you out the gates. Half the screws are dykes, anyway, so I won’t look out of place.

I kinda doubt your dykey appearance is the biggest problem, Denny. Your prisoner-y appearance is probably more significant.

Jessie tries to talk her out of it, using a very motherly tone. She might just be a decent mum if she could stay sober.

But Denny won’t listen. When the time comes, she goes out to the potting shed and dresses up like a guard. Isn’t it cool that she can manage all this in prison? They seem to have so many resources at their fingertips.

Jessie goes out to the shed and makes herself clear:

Jessie: It’s not gonna work, Den. You’re risking everything. All I can think about is where the nearest pub is.

Denny says she can help Jessie get off the booze, but Jessie says she has to do that herself. She says goodbye and leaves Denny sobbing in the shed.

I hate to say it, Den, but your mum’s right this time.

A sigh of relief — Helen has just met with the Governing Governor, who is understandably upset about the Zandra incident. But he doesn’t want to lose two good officers over a “stupid mistake.” Dominic considers this good news, but Helen is wearing her stern face and tells him to get back to work. But after he goes, she smiles to herself. You seem to be doing a lot of secret smiling lately, Helen.

Zandra’s cell — Lorna delivers the requested valium. She leaves without a word.

A pub — Jessie starts to go in, but stops just short of the door and turns back around. It sounds cheesy, but it’s just kind of cool.

A confession — Dominic tells Lorna that Helen (not to mention the Governing Gov) knows everything about Zandra’s escape. He tries to tell Lorna it’s fine, but Lorna looks like she’s about to hurl.

Mail call and night calls — Denny has a postcard from her mother: “Two days and not a drop.” I can’t help it: I’m rooting for them.

As night falls, the inmates tease Denny about her mum. It’s clear that they’re rooting for her too.

NEXT TIME ON BAD GIRLS: Lorna continues to live on the edge; Nikki lives the good life.

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