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“Pretty Little Liars” recap (7.9): The Kahn Job

Paige and Emily are filling out their job applications, but Emily is struggling with the whole arrest/crime conviction portion of the app. Hasn’t Emily held down, like, 40 different jobs throughout this series? How has she not encountered this problem before? Paige assures her that the principal knows all about her past, and wouldn’t have invited her to apply if he cared. Let’s be real: Rosewood High standards are LOW. They even let Alison DiLaurentis teach, and she literally never graduated from high school.

So I listed finger blasting under special skills, but should I put it before or after Microsoft Office proficiency?

Paige and Emily walk through the halls, reminiscing about high school. Paige wishes she could go back, but Emily isn’t interested in reliving the four seasons of stalking and murder. Paige asks Emily to hang out, but Emily tells her she has plans with Sabrina. Paige pretends not to know this (despite seeing them through the window), and Emily says that while Sabrina is nice, she doesn’t see a future with her. Emily doesn’t want to tell Sabrina about her past, maybe because it would take at least 20 days and an extensive Powerpoint presentation to get through it.

Don’t you wish you could come back to Rosewood High as a confident, out lesbian?
This school came to life and tried to eat me once, so nah, I’m good

Emily tells Paige that the A game is happening all over again, and Paige tells her that whoever she is dating needs to know what Emily is up against. If only there were someone in Emily’s life who knew her troubled backstory and understood her. Someone like Paige. Or Ali. OR Hanna Marin.

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