“Scream” recap (2.8): Carnival Carnage

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Welcome back to Lakewood, or, as it will soon be more appropriately renamed, “the charred and gutted remains of everything Emma and her friends have ever loved!” Last week, Seth Branson died like six separate times, Kristen Lang survived a long walk off a short stairwell, and Gustavo was nowhere to be seen. It was beautiful, but all beautiful things must come to an end.

This week, Murderville is celebrating its centennial–that’s 100 years in existence, to be clear, not one hundred murders. One hundred murders in Lakewood isn’t a milestone; it’s a Thursday. But one hundred years is a perfect excuse to throw a big carnival with lots of exciting rides for people to get pushed off, trapped inside, or mangled by the gears of. You’ve got to hand it to Lakewood: their survival instincts are nonexistent, but they do know how to party.

Audrey wakes up to find that someone’s been getting arts-and-crafty on the ceiling above her bed.

scream 8.1Who doesn’t put a drop cloth down before they paint the ceiling?

…and on her mirror.

scream 8.2I will definitely be leaving this contractor a scathing review on Google.

Audrey and Noah count up all the murders and come up with 11 if you count Piper, meaning either there’s a corpse somewhere they don’t know about, or the killer is bad at math. Audrey’s still wavering on whether to tell Emma about her involvement with Piper, even though Noah keeps trying to convince her that the truth shall set her free.

Emma finds Eli at school and asks him if they can talk in private. He’s like “So, pants optional, or…?” Meanwhile, Audrey and Noah are chatting with Zoe and Gustavo about Lang’s botched attempt to make the Olympic diving team. Gustavo points out that if her fall was an attack, it’s a pretty boring one. He asks Audrey what she saw since she was at the crime scene, but before she can answer she’s cut off by an announcement from Mayor Brooke’s Dad. He says there’s no fucking way they’re canceling the carnival; the “Welcome to Lakewood” sign reads “Putting Human Lives In Danger In Pursuit of a Good Time since 1916” for a reason. He’s making Brooke go to the carnival, so she demands her friends come too.

scream 8.3I’d love to ride the Tilt-a-Whirl with you, if you know what I mean.

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