TV

“Wynonna Earp” recap (1.13): Bulletproof, nothing to lose

Previously on Wynonna Earp, Bobo inexplicably saved Willa, Waverly found the treehouse she was kept in so Willa started to get memories back, Bobo threw a party and poisoned the whole town, Wynonna kissed Dolls, and Bobo sent the poisoned townspeople after Wynonna for the antidote while he walked toward the line of the Ghost River Triangle with the heir and her gun. Also Nicole Haught flirted with Waverly, making her feel New Feelings and patiently waited until she realized she was in lesbians with the hot cop.

We pick up where we left off, with Wynonna, Doc and Dolls in the middle of a zombie horde out for Wynonna’s head. Wynonna wants to find her sisters to make sure they made it out okay, so they throw her out the window and make their way through the masses to find the antidote.

Meanwhile, Willa and Bobo are being gross at the border to the Ghost River Triangle. They walk through the archway together and things get grosser as Bobo starts to sizzle like bacon. They dive back over the line and realize the gun in Willa’s bag they thought was Peacemaker isn’t Peacemaker at all.

And guess who has it.

Waverly. But Waverly doesn’t get to enjoy her success for long because as soon as she checks that Peacemaker is still safe in her bag, she gets chloroformed and kidnapped.

Meanwhile, at the border, Willa is pissed. She doesn’t understand how this could happen to her; she suckered Wynonna into trusting her and, it’s not like it could be Waverly. Bobo doesn’t underestimate her sister the way she does, though, and knows it could very well be either one of them, so he sends her back to her sisters to find Peacemaker.

Doc and Dolls go back to the police station to try to make a plan to get the antidote from the basement of Shorty’s when they hear someone coming. They scramble to get their weapons ready and Doc finds Dolls’ drug gun. Dolls promises it’s medicine, not narcotics, and Doc has no way of knowing this isn’t how all the heroin addicts are shooting up these days. (Hell, *I* don’t even know that it’s not how heroin addicts are shooting up these days.) Just then, Officer Haught runs in, still in her eveningwear, and asks what she can do to help. Dolls barks at her that it’s classified, the way he’s been doing all season, but Doc rolls his eyes. He looks Haught in the eyes and lays it all out, the recap version of everything that’s been going on: The Revenants, the Earp heir, that he’s Doc Holliday, everything. As soon as he’s done, Haught is…relieved. She thanks him for telling her the damn truth, FINALLY, and is pretty stoked when he tosses her a gun. But puts on her Serious Face right away.

She’s ready to fight-even more so now that she doesn’t feel like she’s taking stabs in the dark, so Dolls sends her to find the Earp girls and make sure Sheriff Nedley is still alive. Oh and he also welcomes her to the Black Badge Division, calling her Agent Haught, earning him-nay, earning us all-the biggest, brightest smile.

Wynonna goes back to the Homestead to look for her sisters, stripping off her not-easy-to-fight-in garb all the while. And of course, as soon as she’s stuck in her dress, one of her exes, Pete, shows up, wanting her dead for more than just the antidote. And just FYI, unlike Officer Haught, Pete didn’t help Wynonna get unstuck. Just saying.

Wynonna tries to remind Pete of all the positive history they have, like how in Kindergarten she wore laceless shoes in solidarity until he learned to tie his. (Further proof to my evolving theory that Wynonna is a Hufflepuff forced to act like a Gryffindor because of, well, everything in her life.) But he just remembers how he slept with his brother. She really doesn’t want to hurt him, but ends up not having to, because Willa comes in just in time to smack him over the head with a frying pan like some kind of Rapunzel.

Wynonna is very happy her sister is safe. Willa weaves some sob story about getting separated from Waverly, and then asks Wynonna where Peacemaker is. You know, for safety.

But then even as Wynonna is tying Pete up, even as she’s digging for his phone to call Waverly, Willa is still insisting on knowing where the gun is, all but saying to forget about Waverly and focus on the gun. Wynonna is concerned by this, but a ringing house phone interrupts. Wynonna digs around for the ancient technology, and it’s Chrissy Nedley calling, saying she has Waverly held hostage at the police station.

Willa is STILL asking after Peacemaker, even after the call, and Wynonna tells her to pull herself together and help her save their baby sister, saying, “Peacemaker is just a gun. Waverly is Waverly.”

They run to the police station and take down Chrissy and Willa unties Waverly, much to her surprise. But it becomes clear soon enough that Willa is still on her obsessive hunt for Peacemaker and doesn’t care about her at all. Waverly grabs her purse protectively, and Willa knows that her little sister is the one who took Peacemaker from her. And Willa is shocked that Waverly pulled this off because her hubris caused her to discount our Brave Little Toaster.

Waverly throws the gun at Wynonna, saying she took it because she saw something worrisome in Willa’s eyes in the treehouse, and Willa drops the act, letting her evil seep through her pores and pointing a gun at her sisters.

Wynonna is trying to talk Willa down when Nicole comes strolling in, looking for Waverly. Willa trains the gun on Haught instead, threatening to kill Waverly’s girlfriend if they don’t hand Peacemaker over. Oblivious Wynonna is confused by what she means by “girlfriend” and at first, Waverly is, too, but when it becomes REALLY clear that Willa has no qualms about killing “some ginger butch cop” Waverly pleads with Wynonna, saying she loves Nicole.

Wynonna looks at her sister and understands. This time understands, fully.

And even though the whole time the gun was pointed at her, Nicole was still trying to save Waverly, she looks a little relieved when Wynonna hands over Peacemaker. But then Willa shoots Haught anyway, as payback sort of, but mostly because she’s a giant bitch.

Waverly runs to Nicole, Wynonna not far behind, but with the absence of blood, Wynonna is worried that her new friend and her sister’s girlfriend might be a Revenant. But when she tears open Nicole’s shirt to inspect the wound, they find the most glorious thing: A bulletproof vest.

Wynonna says that Waverly, “Finally picked a smart one,” and winks at her sister, but also maybe at us, because look at this show. We picked a smart one, too. Both queer women survived an entire season on a show riddled with guns and demons, both of them even getting shot but making it through, just like everyone else. Nicole tells them where Doc and Dolls went, and Waverly beams through her worried tears, proud of her girl. So they kiss.

And you guys, the music LOVES them. With all the fraught love triangles and evil duos on this show, whenever Nicole and Waverly are kissing, the music just swells and swoons and dances in happy circles around them. It’s really beautiful. They’re really beautiful. For anyone wondering what we mean when we say LGBT characters deserve better, this is it. This is the kind of love story we deserve.

Wynonna gives the lovebirds a second to do their thing but literally only a second before throwing Waverly’s coat at her and saying lezgo. Waverly kisses Nicole goodbye and off they go. Outside, she wipes her tears away and steels her face, ready to get Willa back for shooting her girlfriend. That’s right! Her GIRLFRIEND, dammit! Nothing like a good life or death situation to eliminate the need to have “the” conversation.

The girls aren’t scared, but maybe they should be, because the zombie horde has found them.

In all the family drama, the girls almost forgot Wynonna was being hunted by her rabid enemies.

But just when it looks like there’s no way out, Nedley comes forward and tells the town that Wynonna is their best chance at survival, but not from turning her over, from letting her save them instead. He admits that they made Wynonna into the “bad girl” they perceive her to be, so now they can choose differently and, all be better off for it in the end. So he sends the Earp girls off, and in return they leave them with the knowledge that his daughter is safe.

Doc and Dolls raid Shorty’s, and when Dolls passes out from a gunshot wound, Doc shoots him up with some of his medicine, causing him to go Full Lizard. He storms back into Shorty’s and throws men right out the window, finishing off what they started.

Wynonna and Waverly decide to split up, Waverly saying she has something that only she can do. So Wynonna kisses her baby sister on the forehead, and they part ways.

Wynonna goes to Shorty’s and finds all the Revenants knocked out, and Doc and Dolls all weirdly chummy, but Wynonna doesn’t have time to ask questions. She gets them up to speed, throws out one last “stupid Carl” for the season, and takes Doc with her to stop this chaos. Dolls, injured and drained from his lizard-spree, is going to stay behind and wait for his boss to come scold him.

Meanwhile, Waverly goes to the treehouse to find Bobo waiting for Willa. They do a bit of a dance around the tree, Waverly not wanting to get too close, but as he talks, she stops and listens. Bobo tells Waverly he saved Willa, that he was protecting her up here in this birdcage. That when the Stone Witch took her away, Bobo dug for years trying to find her sons to get Willa back. Waverly is unimpressed at his tale, still thinking it sounds pretty twisted. Bobo says he used to watch all three girls when they were little, confused as to what Ward Earp did to earn such beautiful gifts. He thought of saving the baby of the family, and she assumes he didn’t because she wasn’t the heir, but at this he just chuckles. She’s not even an Earp.

Which I think is so interesting, for a lot of reasons. One being that the Earp family has always been at the heart of this show, it’s literally the central storyline because of the curse, but Willa coming back was starting to teach them that blood doesn’t make family. Just because Willa was their sister didn’t mean she felt like one of them. And I think maybe next season they’ll learn the reverse; even if Waverly and Wynonna aren’t blood related at all, nothing will change the fact that they’re sisters. Also Waverly’s whole thing has been trying to figure out where she fits in and who she is. She’s starting to learn about herself with Nicole’s help, but there’s still a lot that never felt right to her about her family, and now maybe she’ll start to figure out why.

Anyway.

Willa shows up before we can all demand more answers, Bobo hides Waverly. As Willa calls Waverly a snitch and takes Bobo and Peacemaker away, Waverly cries.

After getting a little pep talk about a rabid dog he had to put down from Doc, Wynonna admits that she’s a little afraid to fight her sister, because she’s got magic on her side. She blames herself for trusting Willa, but who wouldn’t want to trust their long lost big sister? She swears she won’t put her sister down like a dog, and Doc sincerely hopes she won’t have to.

Meanwhile, Dolls’ boss is ripping him a new one for not mentioning that there could be a second Earp heir. Her orders are to let Bobo open the gateway so they can observe it, even after he points out it will be hard to observe anything when EVERYONE IS DEAD. She also drops a little hint about Dolls’ past: Something happened in Kandahar (I’m pretty sure she said Kandahar) that makes her see him as a monster for more reasons than just the whole lizard thing.

Doc and Wynonna catch up with Willa and Bobo and start shooting, but Bobo is magicking bullets away left and right. He pulls Doc’s gun away first, then Wynonna’s, but she’s not surprised, or even mad. She instead gives him the finger, on which is a grenade pin.

Because she’s a smart cookie, that Wynonna Earp. Or a smart donut. I think she’d like that better.

Anyway, Doc and Bobo are down for the count, so it’s just the Earp girls by the time Wynonna catches up to Willa. She begs her sister not to do this, to wake up and remember who she really is. But the Willa she played gummy bear parade with is gone, and this Willa struts right through the archway. Immediately darkness falls on Willa’s side of the arch, the ground shakes, thunder claps. Willa thinks it’s perfect that this is all happening here, where their mother used to take them when she was tired of being hit by who I believe we can officially call their asshole of a father. Wynonna says they can start over, make everything right, but Willa is sure this is the answer. No more Purgatory, no more Earps, no more curse.

Then the two sisters draw on each other.

Willa pulls the trigger first, but Peacemaker won’t shoot. She doesn’t understand why, but Wynonna does. It failed on her when she doubted herself, it’s failing on Willa because she has too much hate in her heart. There’s a reason it’s not called the Warmaker.

Dolls appears as if out of nowhere and shoots Willa, causing a tentacle monster to lurch from the ground and pick her up as if wanting to suck the vitality right out of her. Wynonna runs across the line to get Peacemaker, and points it at her sister, who is being squeezed to death by the octolamprey. Peacemaker glows blue, and Wynonna meets her sister in the eye and tells her to make her peace. Almost begs her.

When her sister is gone, Wynonna superhero slides back across the line just in time, closing the portal and disintegrating the part of the monster that was still over the line. The guys are happy Wynonna is alive, but she ended up having to put her sister down after all, so she’s having a hard time sharing their joy.

Wynonna finds Bobo, still twitchy and weak from the explosion, and she’s about to shoot him with Peacemaker when Dolls’ boss shows up to take him away instead. Wynonna needs to kill him to kill the curse, but bosslady doesn’t give a flying fuck what anyone else needs. She threatens Wynonna with knowledge of something mysterious Wynonna did in per past that, from the look on her face, she didn’t think anyone knew.

Juan Carlos shows up to tell Wynonna that the Ghost River Triangle works two ways-keeps things in and keeps things out-to stress the importance of keeping that portal closed. But Wynonna knows one thing for sure now: She is the Earp heir. And she’s got shit to do.

Bobo and Dolls are being carted away, and as soon as they cross the town line, Bobo starts to laugh and scream and fry. Wynonna steps into the middle of the road, shooting Bobo between the eyes, saving him from endless misery, saving herself from having to hope the Black Badge powers that be give him back so she can end the curse.

He survives long enough to give her a grateful look, but she took no pleasure in killing him, even if he was the Big Bad of the season. It doesn’t help that she knows this will come back on Dolls, who is still under arrest for treason for going to help Wynonna against orders.

Wynonna and Doc take Waverly to the site where Willa died, and Wynonna says they’ll plant a poplar tree for Willa in the spring. Well, the real Willa. Not this psychopath who swooped into their lives to cause them emotional and physical distress. Waverly inspects the line where the gate was opened and sees a puddle of good. And, being too curious and brave for her own good, sticks her finger right in it. Which instantly makes her look like she’s using the Lexa Snapchat filter (but is probably something a little more nefarious than that).

After confirming that saving Dolls is one of her many plans for next steps, thunder strikes and, Wynonna says that she’s ready for anything. But what none of us were quite ready for was this: Waverly pulls pulling a gun on Wynonna and Doc…and shoots.

The end! What’d you think? Insane, right? Wynonna broke my damn heart a hundred times this episode. Willa made me angry. Nicole almost gave me a heart attack. And Waverly! Sweet Waverly. My Brave Little Toaster, my lovely little Ravenpuff. Let’s hope she can fight whatever evil just possessed her and that she doesn’t do anything she’ll regret too much when she pulls through. I mean, they thought they could pull Willa back to them, but she was just too far gone. Surely they can save Waverly. Maybe Nicole even can. “Come back to me, baby.” Okay, okay, tell me all your theories, all your unanswered questions, favorite scenes, lines, moments. I’m not ready to say goodbye.

And until next time, tweet me all your best #WayHaught fics (@PunkyStarshine), come play in the #HaughtDamn tag, and keep asking SyFy to #RenewWynonnaEarp!

Lesbian Apparel and Accessories Gay All Day sweatshirt -- AE exclusive

Related Articles

Leave a Reply

Back to top button