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“Call the Midwife” recap (5.8): Weddings and Funerals

It’s the season finale of Call The Midwife, and they aren’t about to let us off the hook that easily. This episode brings tears, laughs, and a devastating loss to Nonnatus House as the series heads into the 1960s. The upside? A very happy ending for Team Pelia!

We open at the local clinic, where Shelagh tells her husband that women are lined up around the block to get the birth control pill. Unfortunately, that line-up includes unmarried women, who are not allowed to have access. My mother, who was a teenager in the ’60s, told me that she and her friends bought fake engagement rings to convince doctors to give them the prescription. I think this probably worked better in New York than in Poplar.

Women in charge of their own reproductive rights? What a notion!

Over at Nonnatus House, Fred and Violet are working in the garden when they run into Violet’s cousin Tessie and her son Mitchell. Mitchell is back from Australia, where he left his pregnant girlfriend. Tessie hopes that they can whip up a wedding before the baby comes out, and they go to ask Tom for a speedy service.

At the clinic, Sisters Evangelina and Monica Joan check up on the local children, and Rhoda (the thalidomide mum from 5.1) is there with baby Susan. She keeps Susan all wrapped up in a blanket so the other mums can’t see her deformities. Despite her rough start, Susan seems to be healthy and shows some muscle development in her limbs. Rhoda puts on a brave face, but the stress of caring for a disabled baby is taking its toll. Dr. Turner prescribes her some medicine to help her sleep. Yup, more thalidomide.

It’s okay dear, why don’t you try some cocaine? I’ve heard it’s ever so safe!

Barbara encourages Evangelina to help with the newborns, but since her stroke, Evangelina has sworn off caring for babies. She calls childbirth a two handed job and has resigned herself to help older kids at the clinic. Also, a baby poops all over Barbara. Frankly, I’m surprised the women of Nonnatus House aren’t continually covered in blood and feces. That’s a lot of habits to wash.

All I said was I was voting for Trump, and everyone started throwing feces at me!

Barbara visits with Tripti, a Bangladeshi Mum O’ The Week, who lives in squalid conditions in a tiny flat. Barbara is bitten by fleas/bedbugs and worries about the birth. Luckily, she’s learned some Sylheti phrases to help comfort the mum.

Across town, the boat has docked and Noelle, Mitchell’s fiancée, has arrived. Tessie hugs her and welcomes her to the family. Speaking of travel, Patsy helps Delia get a passport, and they must wait for Delia’s mum to deliver it. They notice a sad woman drinking out of a flask at the café, but can’t remember who she is.

I dunno, Dels, but I don’t think the Island of Lesbos is like the Gateways club

The Mother House has sent several boxes of stuff to Nonnatus House, and the sisters start unpacking crates filled with old books and the wedding dresses they wore when they took their orders. Apparently it was tradition for postulants to wear donated bridal gowns, and the sisters commiserate over dress adjustments and high heels. Cynthia took her orders in her habit and thinks about the days when she dreamed of being a bride.

Tripti goes into labor, and Barbara convinces Evangelina to give her a helping hand. Evangelina remembers that, like Barbara, she made an effort to learn a foreign language, and tells Barbara that she knew a few Yiddish phrases back in the day. They set off for the flat, but not before Evangelina berates Fred for failing to fix her flat tire. I don’t know why, but I never tire of hearing people yell at Fred.

You’re only 15 minutes old and you’re already smarter than Fred!

Barbara helps deliver a healthy baby girl, and Evangelina helps fetching water and bathing the baby. Despite her protestations, she finds a way to wash and hold the baby with her paralyzed hand. The women arrive home for tea and cake, but MJ has nabbed it from them. Evangelina rails on her for stealing the snacks and settles in for a nap on the sofa. Barbara tucks her in with a blanket and she drifts off to sleep.

The next morning, Fred arrives to light the fireplace, and he finds Evangelina still on the sofa. She passed away in the night. News spreads of her passing and the sisters pray in the chapel with the midwives share a cigarette on the stairs. Dr. Turner assumes it was another stroke that took her, and Julienne begs for them to avoid a postmortem. Monica Joan is especially upset at the idea of an autopsy and demands that they leave Evangelina’s body in peace.

Pretty much how we all feel

If you thought that was the only tragedy in this episode, hold onto your fucking hat. Dr. Turner gets news that thalidomide is being recalled due to birth defects, and realizes that he’s prescribed it to dozens of patients. He calls the board of health and Shelagh goes through their files to find the patients.

Cynthia visits Noelle and sees her pink wedding outfit. Noelle always dreamed of getting married in white, but bridal gowns won’t accommodate a pregnant woman’s body. We see the wheels in Cynthia’s head start turning. Later on, she tells Julienne that she heard the voice of Evangelina telling her to give Noelle her used gown. Everyone deals with grief in their own ways: Julienne weeps, Fred fixes the broken bicycle, and everyone is heartbroken.

Julienne and Nurse Crane are called to the clinic to help with the thalidomide research, but Crane wisely sends Julienne home to grieve and asks her to send Patsy to help. Dr. Turner is wracked with guilt and realizes that they must recall every pill immediately. They trace all the prescriptions and realize that Rhoda got some pills from her sister, who was prescribed them as a sedative. Apparently the folks of Poplar shared and passed around pills, which made the correlation so difficult to pinpoint.

Here’s an idea: Stop prescribing poison and start giving out some birth control, yeah?

Back at Nonnatus House, the sisters clean and dress Evangelina while the midwives tailor her wedding dress for Noelle. When the undertaker arrives, he offers to do the entire funeral for free. Sister Evangelina helped birth him when he was a preemie, and saved his life, so he considers it the least he could do. Flowers and condolences pour in from all over town.

The nurses go door to door and reclaim all the thalidomide pills. Julienne visits the drunk woman in the café, who was the mum from 5.4, and explains to her about the birth defects. The woman still carries the pills and takes one more before handing off the bottle.

Trixie and Nurse Crane iron their funeral clothes, and Trixie starts crying. Evangelina taught her so much, and Trixie has grown greatly since we first met her. She now knows her own strength and realizes that she doesn’t need a man to make her happy. Crane comforts her and assures her that there is someone out there for her.

You mean this birth control thing is still up for debate in 2016? JFC.

The people of Poplar are lined up outside Nonnatus House to pay their respects to Evangelina. Sgt. Noakes comes in to pay his respects and admits that he was terrified of her. BTW, why aren’t Jenny and Chummy in this episode? Would have been a great moment for a midwives reunion.

Patsy and Delia have lunch with Delia’s mum, and we find out that Delia is training to be a midwife! Her mum turns up her nose at the change in career, despite Patsy’s presence at the table. Patsy tells her that she’s taking Delia to Paris, and of course, her mum disapproves. She claims to be a “sophisticated woman” and admits that Delia always did her own thing. She’s fine being upset, but she asks Delia not to make her dad cry and hands over the birth certificate. She also calls Pelia “thick as thieves.” I’m not sure whether she realizes the girls are gay or just “different,” but this is about the closest thing we’ll get to her approval, so I’m taking it. Dear TV Gods, please show us Pelia in Paris, eating croissants and scissoring on the Seine!

We’re going to Paris, and I’m getting all up in your daughter’s Arc de Triomphe!

Are you sure you girls aren’t more interested in the Eiffel Tower?

Over at the community center, Mitchell and Noelle are married just in time, as Noelle goes into labor at the reception hall. While guests are dancing in a conga line, Cynthia and Trixie help her birth a healthy baby boy, and everyone rejoices. Way to get it in under the wire, kids!

I’m not crying out of pain; I just got the bill for the reception!

Dr. Turner and Shelagh explain the effects of thalidomide to Rhoda, who bursts into tears and apologizes to Susan for taking the pills. She tells them that her husband is slowly but surely bonding with the baby and that they’ll figure out a way forward. It’s heartbreaking stuff.

The next day, streets are closed, and the town stands still for Evangelina’s funeral procession. Lines of mourners watch the horse and carriage take away the coffin, but before they go, MJ places her Evangelina’s old shoes on top of the coffin Simple, direct, and utilitarian: just as Sister Evangelina would have preferred it.

When MJ cries, I cry

And that’s a wrap on Season 5 of Call The Midwife. I’ll be back to recap the Christmas special, as well as season six, both of which have been confirmed by the BBC. In the meantime, don’t miss my recaps of the final season of Pretty Little Liars, coming June 22nd!

How did you like Season 5? Tweet me your feels @ChelseaProcrast

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