Previously on Once Upon a Time, Ruby and Dorothy made out, Hades told Zelena he loved her and that her kiss could restart his heart and free him from hell, Belle put herself under a sleeping curse to preserve her pregnancy so Hades couldn’t take her baby, Snow went off to Storybrooke, and Hades turned Cora into a miller as her eternal punishment.
Hades brings Zelena to make-out point and waves his arm over Not!Storybrooke, saying someday everything the light doesn’t touch will be hers. His plan is to keep Regina and her friends in hell so he and Zelena can take over the real Storybrooke. Instead of, I dunno, letting Regina and Emma have Storybrooke and going LITERALLY ANYWHERE ELSE IN THE WORLD. I hear there’s a Hellmouth in Ohio.
Hades gets down on one me and asks, “Will you make chaos with me?” and Zelena looks torn.
Zelena comes home to find her sister there sippin’ tea like Kermit.
“I hear you’ve been parking with Hades…but that’s none of my business.”
Regina was spying and doesn’t approve of her sister’s beau. Zelena thinks she can change Hades, but Regina isn’t so sure. Zelena tells Regina to GTFO and stop pretending she wants to be a good sister.
Flashback to a teeny tiny Regina playing with a doll and wishing it was a sister. Cora yells at her for wanting a playmate and tells Regina the only person a girl can count on is herself.
“But what if one day I want to marry a bail bonds person?”
Once she leaves, Regina finds Cora’s wand and tries to Pinocchio her doll to life but ends up knocking herself out.
After some brief commentary on gun safety (“Don’t you keep it locked up?”), Cora is forced to find someone in the family who can fix Regina, for no discernable reason other than this episode is called Sisters.
Regina tells Emma that Zelena is in love and acting irrational, unlike them who are acting totally normal, standing 15 feet apart to have a conversation. Regina’s plan is to find Cora to help her talk Zelena out of this relationship. Which also doesn’t follow very solid logic, but honestly nothing on this show does anymore.
Flash back to Cora finding Young Zelena with her abusive father in Oz.
“I didn’t mean to freeze you; I meant to topple the entire patriarchy.”
She takes her back to the castle and has her heal Young Regina, and the two of them play and get along fabulously. They even find out that they’re sisters and couldn’t be more delighted. But Cora gets mad that Regina liked being not alone, plus if anyone finds out she has a bastard child it will ruin her reputation in the kingdom. So she wipes the girls’ memories and sends Zelena back to her hellish childhood.